Monday, October 1, 2018

World's Most Perplexing Questions... & College Football Prophecies

B in T Questions to ponder!!

  1. Who would win between Florida State and Broken Arrow at a neutral site?
  2. Does Sam Presti of the Thunder look exactly like Tulsa Mayor Bynum?
  3. Are Mylie Syres and Hanna Montanna the same person?  Have you ever seen them together at the same time?
  4. Will there be a Sharknado 8?
  5. Does Coach Gundy color his mullet?
  6. Has anyone seen Kansas Basketball Bill Self’s hair move?  Ever? 
  7. Does this year's Super Bowl halftime activity really move like Jagger?
  8. Will Boccia Ball replace the NFL as the top sports empire?
  9. If caught cow tipping in Oklahoma is it a misdemeanor or a lynching?  Google it?  Seriously!
  10. Who has a higher pitched voice Tiny Tim or Chiefs QB Mahomes?

Dr. B in T Takes Credit for Birds Surge
B in T, Faked Out Sports would like to apologize to my fellow St. Cardinal baseball fans for doubting our team this year while they stunk!!  I was doing what is known as reverse psychology, rope a dope, or fake dislike!!  The Cards started winning, and I will take the credit!!  Go Birds!!!

College Football Picks!

Houston 49 Tulsa 24
Numerous Tulsa Alums had a huge party 🎉 at the Phillips 66 corporate offices after the game!!  Don’t tell anyone but there were lots of liquor, drugs and wild women there!!  That was all ignored when the Western Sizzerler buffet arrived!!  Tulsa Alums know how to eat and party!!

Alabama 45 Arkansas 10
Coach Grumpy Saban’s Tide rolls over the Razorbacks and a number of Hog fans take out their frustration by not eating Tyson Chicken 🍗 until the football team wins another game!!  The protest was stopped when the Arkansas National Guard was called in and Tyson Chicken was on dinner tables!!

Oklahoma 48 Texas 27
The Oklahoma football team and coaching staff are tremendously worried about injury to the smallish Quarterback Murray!!  NASA has sent OU some padding that is in his jersey and football pants of Murray for the Texas game!!  He looked like the Stay Puff Marshmallow man and started bouncing off defenders and took the jersey and pants off at halftime!!

Oklahoma State 38  Iowa State 30
Clone Nation’s trip to Stillwater was a disaster when numerous fans, team managers and cheerleaders were hit with food poisoning at a local popular Mexican restaurant in Stillwater Friday night!! Refried beans were the culprit!!  The restaurants refried bean stirrer was accused of putting laxatives in the beans but there was not enough proof to file charges!!  True story!!

Texas A&M 42  Kentucky 26
B in T will be at this game with his wife!!  Our beloved Aunt and Uncle and Cousins invite us down to Aggie land to lose some brain cells while watching big time college football!!  Last year I had a sideline pass thanks to my gracious cousin!!  I also tried to put the Sooner flag on Revelry, the A&M dog mascot!!  B in T will not be on the sidelines this year!!  

Virginia Tech 28 Notre Same 24
Union High Schools own Justin Fuente will outcoach and possibly REPLACE coach Kelly at Notre Dame!!  You heard it here first!!

Which of the following coaches will be a TV analysts in 2019?

  1. Willie ‘no clue’ Taggert-  Florida State
  2. Scott ‘jack’ Frost-  Nebraska
  3. Chip Kelly - UCLA
  4. Chad Morris -  Arkansas

A valuable quote that B in T would like to pass along to all sports fans:

B, in T
“Always love thy neighbor, unless they are a frickin’ Longhorn”!!

Willie Taggert needs to start looking over his shoulder quickly!!  The three remaining dudes are fine through 2020!