Thursday, January 28, 2021

Stoop Family Thanksgiving




Faked Out Sports - Bryan in Tulsa


FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM


soonerpolitics.org


Bobblehead Sports:


I had the opportunity to see both my grandkid play basketball in the same night last week!  This is considered a ‘night on the town’ for Mimi and Papa!!  Ana dominated in her 4-year-old game making 4 of her team’s 5 baskets!  In Gustavo’s nightcap game Papa received a technical foul from his wife and daughter for being too loud!!  Both the rugrats came over the next day and presented a contract for Papa to sign agreeing to BE QUIET at their games in the future!!  If not, I must stay home and watch 48 Hours on TV!!  Contract attached:



FOS Notes:


Next Stoops Family Thanksgiving:


Fired former DC at Oklahoma, Mike Stoops is rumored to be the new linebackers coach forthe Texas Shorthorns!!  The dining room at the Stoops home will be lit up with football chatter during Thanksgiving dinner!!  OU receiver Drake Stoops and nephew of Mike will ask Uncle Mike to pass the mashed potatoes where he will accidentally on purpose drop them in Uncle’s lap!!  Legendary former Sooner coach Bob Stoops just sits at the head of the table and releases a wicked chuckle and leads the Stoop clan with a thunderous round of Boomer Sooner!!  Mike and Erin Stoops left the Thanksgiving 🍗 function early and finished dinner at the Norman Western Sizzler in their burnt orange Texas sweaters!!  Coach Mike is also rumored to be on the shortlist to be the next defensive coordinator at NEO, Tahlequah!!  He sent his resume to NOC, Tonkawa but they have no football team!!  


Rumor Mill continued:


Rumors on the Dan Patrick Show and TMZ are HOT about Tennessee  Football!!  The assistant coaches at Tennessee handed out the money in McDonald's paper sacks as part of their recruiting spiel!!  There was nothing hidden and it was well known and expected by some Volunteers recruits!  The only difference from the Tulsa University late ’70s recruiting was the sacks for football recruits had actual McDonald Quarter pounders and fries in them!!



Where is TU All everything, Zaven Collins, playing Pro Football?


Cleveland Browns -  Baker and Zaven against the world!!  Cold weather, very plain city but they love their football!!


Kansas City Chiefs - the Chiefs need defense and linebackers specifically!!  Great barbecue city but no NBA basketball!!  No major league baseball either!  Oh wait, forgot the Royals!!  I think they are triple-A.


New Orleans Saints - Going from Hominy, Oklahoma to Bourbon street in New Orleans would be tough for most but Zaven is so grounded!!   I believe he will invite his old friend Bryan in Tulsa for Beignets and Hurricane drinks!!


Jacksonville Jaguars - Trevor Lawrence, Urban Meyer and Zaven Collins will make a great combination and a FOS Super Bowl projection for 2023!!




Miami Dolphins - Zaven has received 5 letters and notes from former Dolphins QB Dan Marino describing the Miami area as the best place to live in America!!  He also sent an autographed picture of himself and Jim Carrey in ‘Ace Ventura:  Pet Detective’!!


FOS Baseball Notes:


My Redbird’s Busch Stadium will allow 8,000 to 12,000 fans per game!!  With all the moves the Cardinals have NOT made this offseason 8,000 fans is a stretch!  Watching Matt Carpenter bat leadoff makes me long for the days of speedsters Willie McGee and Vince Coleman!!




FOS Big Dance in Indiana Projections:


Oklahoma - 90% - 7 Seed - OU coach Kruger is such a nice guy that all of Indiana wants him to play at their school facility!!


Oklahoma State - 92% - 8 seed if pardoned by Biden for NCAA violations 10 years ago!  WTF!  F=frick


Arkansas - 70% - 9 seed play in game!  The Razorback fans have gone hog wild over their basketball!!


Tulsa - 40% - second last 4 not to get in the NCAA Tourney!!  B in T projecting Tulsa to be 2 seed in the National Invitational Tournament in Fargo, North Dakota!


Oral Roberts - 50%- finally beats the large sycamore trees of the Dakotas and wins the postseason tournament!  Automatic bid and Hallelujah!!  The Prayer Tower works!!


FOS College Basketball Picks:


Big 12 - SEC Challenge:


Oklahoma 70 Alabama 65

The Sooners can beat the Tide basketball team but in football, the Sooners are a punching bag for the Tide!!  The Sooners are Grump Saban's biiooootch!!  Sooner coach Lon Kruger is the most delightful man in the history of college basketball coaches!!  On senior day he brought monogrammed tissues for each senior mom who balled!!  Ok, well, OU defeated the Tide with a barrage of 3s in the second half!!  Look out for these two teams in the big dance!!  


Oklahoma State 84 Arkansas 79

Hog’s coach Eric Musselman and Poke’s coach Eric Boynton are a couple of B in T‘s fav coaches!!  I like the way they handle themselves in public!  Each are eloquent and passionate at their craft!!  


Tennessee 74 Kansas 68

Kansas continues to play it’s NCAA seed into the play-in game at a high school somewhere in Indiana!!  Coach Self is good friends with Tennessee coach Rick Barnes from their Big 12 days!!  Both of the coaches decided to take their wives and attend dinner at Calhoun’s by the River!!  THE hot spot in Knoxville!!  Coach Barnes accepted the tab due to coach Self’s Jayhawk credit card is frozen by the NCAA investigations!!


Illinois 78 Iowa 77

Iowa's Luka Garza is destined to be the OKC Thunder’s next Steven Adams but with a nice shooting touch!!  The Illini Kofi Cockburn can score in bunches and he lit the Hawkeyes up for 24 and 11 rebounds. 


Tulsa 68 at East Carolina 61

Big game for the Hurricane who has been off for 2 weeks due to Coronavirus by their opponents!  Tulsa’s Brandon Rachel went crazy and scored 32 of TU’s 68 points with 8 rebounds, 4 assists, and 4 steals!!  Giant cardboard cutouts of Jerry Ososki and his stud son, Owen who just signed with Tulsa had to be placed on the second level so other cardboard fans could see!!  The Ostroski cardboard family travels with the basketball team as cardboard security!!  True shat!  Wikipedia it!!


Have a great sports week!


Faked Out Sports/Bryan in Tulsa



 
by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org

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Thursday, January 21, 2021

Bills vs Packers - Super Bowl Pandemic #1




Faked Out Sports/ Bryan in Tulsa


FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

      


soonerpolitics.org


FOS Bobblehead Sports: 


My granddaughter, Charlotte is approaching her first birthday and has received an early birthday gift!!  The gift is not her own TU jersey, not a toddler Nautilus weight set, not 2021 TU football suite seats, and not her own TU tippy cup since she already has those gifts!!  She is receiving her own Little Tikes basketball goal with collapsible rims for dunking!!!  Her dad and I are training her the drop step, pivot move and are taking classes to become her agent!!

FOS Notes:


FOS Covid Warning:


TU vs Wichita State rivalry - out of control!


Last week just before the ‘Cane / Shocker basketball game numerous protestors were outside the Charles Koch Arena trying to enter the game!!  These black and yellow shocker-covered protesters were angered by the fact that only player families could watch the game live!!  Protestors were seen with crowbars and headphones to pick up the game on the radio in case their attempt to take over the arena failed!!  And it did fail!!  Go Cane and always be aware and respect coronavirus rules for crowd gathering!!

This message was paid for by Cuban / LeBron 2028!!


lululemon NIGHTMARE!


As a rather large, older fart I have never had the occasion to visit the lululemon shop on

Brookside in Tulsa!!  Well I ended up walking into this yuppie, dinc, palates fashion place with a younger child of mine last weekend!!  This child will remain nameless!!  First of all the largest size for men in this God-forsaken so-called clothing store was XL and it would not fit over my head!!  I swear the entire place was looking at B in T and his TU Zaven Collins mask wondering what the shat he was doing in this store!!  There were at least 20 sales reps on a lululemon Saturday and they seemed to avoid me like the plague!!  I purchased a mesh tank top for 95 dollars and use it as a Pandemic mask for the face!!


Go Alexko!!!


The OKC Thunder have future draft superstars and a team that was a preseason pick for 30th place out of 30 teams in the NBA!!  WRONG bong pipe breath!!!!!!  The Thunder have future star Point Guard - Shae Gilgus Alexander and the youngest, boniest, 7’1” point guard in the league!!  His name is Alexko Pokusuvinski from Chezlovachia!!  At 7’1” and 193 pounds he can currently bench the weight lifting bar with spotters!!  FOS odds of the Thunder drafting the number 1 rated player Cade Cunningham of OSU Stillwater is -- 31%!!



Kentucky's Calimari Can't Coach in a Pandemic!


The Kentucky Wildcats are in foreign waters at a record of 4-7 this Pandemic year!!  What the frick is happening, cats and dogs sleeping together, Trump has conceded the Presidential office, and coach Calimari of the blue blood Kentucky Wildcats is actually attempting to coach these McDonald all - Americans!!  My good friends from the Kentucky area are having to learn how to be humble like basketball fans in Oklahoma!!  Rumor has it that due to Coronavirus the assistant coach numbers at Kentucky count have shrunk from 14 to 12 and their Armani suit stipend has been axed!!  True story, Google it!!  I dare ya!


FOS College Basketball:


Baylor 79 at Ok State 66


The Bears are ranked number 2 in the nation and look to win the Big 12 instead of Kansas for the first time in over a decade!!  Oklahoma State Senior Guard Isaac Likelely deserves a trip to the NCAA's but the team is banned this year due to a penalty from a regime 5 years ago!!  Sucks!!



Kansas 68 at Oklahoma 67

Kansas Coach Self is back where the OU fans feed on him like Piranha on a grain-fed hog!!  He is constantly hounded by the Oklahoma student section regarding his toupee!!  Numerous students were dressed as prison guards referring to his problems with the NCAA investigations the Jayhawks are implicated in!!  



Arkansas 82 at Vanderbilt 72

Razorbacks days of throwing a medicine ball around for an hour with Nolan Richardson are gone but current coach Eric Mussleman is using 30 minutes of medicine ball hell and 30 minutes of yoga with the same frickin results!!



Tulsa 77 Tulane 72

The Golden Hurricane is working hard at a National Invitational Tournament (NIT) bid where the entire 32 team tournament will be held at the Fargo, North Dakota High School, and a giant Fargo Airport Hanger!!  The Cane riddled the Green Wave with 3-pointers (11-17) but kept a very stiff and flat crowd awake till the end with 34% from the 2 point range!!



Oral Roberts 94 UMKC 78

ORU studs Abmas and Obannor scored 58 of the team’s points and maybe the best one-two punch in the Nation!!



NFL Playoffs:


AFC Championship 

Bills 35 Chiefs 27

Bills QB Josh Allen completed 14 passes in a row for 3 touchdowns in the second half and concussed Chiefs QB Mahomes still thinks he doing State Farm Commercials!!  One of his teammates, who will remain nameless, said the QB asked if he needed makeup during the middle of a huddle!!



NFC Championship

Packers 31 Buccaneers 27 

Elder statesmen QBs Aaron Rogers and Tom Brady bring their ‘A’ game to Lambeau Field for the NFC Championship game!  The Packer’s Rogers is known for his cannon arm, body swagger, and refuse to lose attitude!!  Buckaneer's Tommy Brady is known for his rejuvenated arm made by Tom House and the use of avocado ice cream to make him look 19 at the age of 43!!


Have a great sports weekend!!




FOS - B in T by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org


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Wednesday, January 13, 2021

Bobblehead Sports are BACK!



Faked Out Sports - Bryan in Tulsa


FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM



soonerpolitics.org


Bobblehead Sports:


My two gorgeous granddaughters in the Oklahoma City area have learned to attack sports as their parents!!  Frankie, at the age of 2 going on 10, is doing junior Pilates, hiking in a jogging stroller, ultimate Frisbee for toddlers, and yoga for mighty mites!!  Frankie is more into sports fashion and is making a statement for the youth of America!!  The younger Rosie is still searching for her favorite sport!!  With the influence of Papa hopefully, she will be shooting baskets at the age of two!!




FOS Notes:


I thought I was watching Olympus Has Fallen, with Gerard Butler but instead, it was CBS news with Oklahoma Senator Mark Wayne Mullin!!  Soooo....bad acting either way!





Coach khaki Harbaugh of Michigan needs to read the fine print of his four-year contract extension!  Section 45 page 467 ‘If at any time the Wolverines lose to Ohio State, he will be fired and stoned in downtown Ann Arbor’, Section 71 page 834, ‘if the Michigan football team loses to a non-power 5 team, Coach Harbaugh will be picked up by a helicopter and dropped into a giant shark tank’!!  Always read the fine frickin print Coach H.!!



Coach Self’s lid.


What the HELL is that thing made of!



  1. Orangutan back hair!
  2. Australian Squirrel Tail!  Most popular pick.
  3. The sticky tar on the highway after 2 weeks of 110* heat!
  4. Westminster Kennel Club dog show, backstage dog hair after grooming!
  5. Oxen hide!




FOS College Basketball Picks:


ORU 89 at Denver 71

The Golden Eagles get to play two games in Denver and I will let you wonder who wins the Faked Out Sports second game!!  The Eagle team went Snowmobiling, played hockey, and a virtual - how to build an igloo documentary - after their first victory Saturday!!



Oklahoma State 73 Oklahoma 71

Superstud Cade Cunningham hits a three-pointer from China with .001 on the shot clock and was carried off the floor after each player put on gloves and masks!!





Baylor 74 at Texas Tech 70

The Baylor Bears 4th ranked basketball team had a huge road win with the Red Raider's getting another heartbreaking loss in the Big 12 Conference!!  Tech coach Chris Beard chased the referees off the court and to their showers complaining about a call in the final seconds of the game!!  He was later notified that be would be suspended for 3 weeks from all showers on the Tech campus!!


Arkansas 80 at Alabama 77

The Razorback fans were asked to not wear plastic hog hats to the Alabama field house during the pandemic!!  The sweat under the hog hats seems to cause more coronavirus cases in the Alabama area according to Dr. Faucci!!


who is dat?





Illinois 73 Ohio State 64

The 15th ranked Illini did something in basketball that they have not been able to do infootball in decades and that was WIN!!  Illinois coach Brad Underarmor has the athletes to take this team deep into the tournament!! 



Kansas 81 Iowa State 73

The Clones have lost numerous close games in the Big 12 this season!!  They have the talent and might be a sleeper in the Big 12 Conference Tournament!!  Kansas may not win the Big 12 for the first time since Apple baskets were used as goals in Lawrence!!




Tulsa 71 Memphis 60

Tulsa had a huge road victory 2 weeks ago against Penny’s Tigers!!  Coach Hardaway and his Amini suit with Nike shoes were overmatched by Tulsa coach Haith and his Blue and Gold Gucci suit and his blue and gold wingtip leather shoes!!  The Tulsa Reynolds Center was packed with flat fans!!  A cardboard cutout of a young Bill Self before hair transplant and B in T when he was young, thin, and nonhandsome were on display in section ZZX row 62!!




FOS NFL Playoff Picks:


NFC


Saints 31 Buccaneers 24

Two G.O.A.T.S. are playing in a game for young men half the age of Tom Brady 43 of Tampa Bay and Drew Brees 42 of New Orleans!!  Drew Brees will be hanging up his size 9 cleats at the end of this season and heading to the TV booth and Tom Brady will be playing till he is fifty and has grandchildren!!  Both QBs hugged and exchanged pleasantries and suggestions for low testosterone medicine!!?


Packers 34 Rams 13

Rams QB Jerod Goff and his cracked thumb on his throwing hand was not helped at all by the 12 below wind chill on the Green Bay frozen tundra!!  A number of the cardboard cutout fans looked very similar to the frozen real fans in seats with an additional 5 inches of snow!!  


AFC


Browns 28 Chiefs 27

The Brown’s Baker Mayfield showed some no-look passes of his own and beat the Chiefs!!  With 3:46 left in the 4th quarter, Baker did the old statue of liberty play to RB Nick Chub for 82 yards and the winning touchdown!!  After the game, Baker Mayfield consoled a high pitched crying Patrick Mahomes!!  Baker simply told him that he can look forward to doing his State Farm commercials with the newly added Baker!!  True story!!  Google it, I promise!!


Bills 35 Ravens 24

Bills all world QB Josh Allen threw for 4 touchdowns and ran for the 5th and the last score!!  He also prepared a pandemic safe breakfast for all the players and their families 6ft apart in the Buffalo International airplane hangar!!  Also before the game, he had each Buffalo family driven to the game in a pandemic safe and cleansed limo from Josh’s Limo Services!!





Have a great sports week!!


Bryan in Tulsa/Faked Out Sports 🏈   by B in T - FakedOutSports, SoonerPolitics.org

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