OU-Texas? What the Frick!

 FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B in T Notes:

B in T bobbleheads:

My son and daughter-in-law are extremely stoked about having their second child and will soon find out the sex of the young Golden Hurricane football player!!  They currently have a beautiful 18-month old daughter that can palm a grapefruit!!  If a boy, the Lohmeyer men want to name the young stud Zaven Richard Lohmeyer!!  Of course if a girl, Zavanna Mariah Lohmeyer would be the men’s selection!!  The name suggestions have not made the top 10 for the very boisterous and always correct Lohmeyer women!!  Stay tuned for more baby news!!

Just found out the wittle baby is a GIRL!

See below:

****Breaking B in T Bobblehead News**** 

The Mimi and Papi grandkids are have just discovered that the 6th grandchild will be another girl!!  Five grandgirls and one grandson!!  OMG, the Lohmeyer men are SURROUNDED!!  Help 🆘!!

B in T Top 5 Hottest and Classiest College Football Coaches Wives:

1. Sarah Harbaugh - Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh’s main squeeze.  She quieted the entire male student section by simply bending over to pick up a hotdog 🌭 wrapper!!  True story!  Google it!  I dare ya!  
2. Jen Bielema - wife of new Illinois coach Bret Bielema!  B in T and Coach Bielema are proof that fat and phat dudes can get stunning chicks!!  Google ‘phat’ if confused!!  I did!
3. Layla Kiffin - wife of Ole Miss coach Lane Kiffin.  Lane’s hairline is disappearing as fast as Layla’s so-called midnight rendezvous to work!!
4. Cathleen Swinney - wife of Clemson coach Dabo Swinney.  Other Clemson’s coaches' wives are so intimidated by her that they will not sit within 20 feet of her at Clemson games!!
5. Ashley Montgomery - wife of Tulsa coach Phillip!  New entry!!  Probably should be number one with all of the monies she has raised for Alzheimer's!!  She has made Tulsa University look blessed to have the Montgomery team 🏉 in Tulsa!!  Go Hurricane!!

Oklahoma and Texas Moving to the SEC?!

Suddenly an 8-4 record looks good the college football icons, OU, and Texas become members of the Southeastern Conference!!  The idea of a national CFA playoff with 3 or 4 SEC teams in an 8 team system sounds very appealing!!  In my illustrious opinion, the American Athletic becomes a stronger conference than the Big 12 with Oklahoma and Texas hauling ass to the SEC!!  Cincinnati and Iowa cancel each other out and the rest goes to the AAC by a wide margin!!  Should the remaining Big 12 little ducklings create a new super conference with the AAC??  Hell yes!!!  FOX Sports Network will put together a super package for this combination of teams!!  The Texas A&M Aggies are very twerk off about the Longhorns entering the SEC zone of college football!!  A&M left the Big 12 or Big 8, whatever it was, years ago to get out of the Texas Longhorn shadow and become a power in the SEC!!  Now the big,  mean, older bother is moving back into the conference house and the A&M is pissed!!  The legal Gods of the A&M trustees have found 124 infractions with lawsuits to throw a Tool time wrench into the Texas and Oklahoma move!!

NBA PLAYOFFS:

The almost 3-month long playoffs and have finally come to an end!  Gina is Arachniaphobia from Greece led the Milwaukee Bucks to their first NBA Championship in 50 years!!  The Phoenix Suns and the rejuvenated Chris Paul puttered out, after taking a 2-0 playoff lead!!  The OKC Thunder have reportedly offered all 73 of their draft choices to the Bucks for Giannis!!!. The offer was rejected by the Bucks front office!!

Coming soon to Faked Out Sports / B in T:

Pumpkin 🎃 Man!

College Football picks from THE PICKER with a record of 2,675 correct picks and 1 incorrect pick!!

B in T top high school towns and diners!!

B in T College Bowl picks!

The cost to you for this stuff is some ‘Jack’ and some ‘Shat’ or zilch!!  

B in T top high school mom competition!

B in T Quote of the Week:

Never drink tequila off of a stripper belly button during the pandemic!!  Just sayin’!!

Have a great sports week!!

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicate SoonerPolitics.org

B, in T

Sponsors: Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson & Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc. Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL) Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK) MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO) Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK Dr. Richard Stephens DDS Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

Boccia is Back at Center

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

COLLEGE FOOTBALL PICKS IN UNDER A MONTH!!  Dilly Dilly!!

B in T Sports Notes:

Three Sooner Football Dudes Punted Off Team:

Two players from the Sooner football running back room and one from the wide receiver room were kicked off the team for robbing and bitch slapping a young man in his dorm for some puff puff hooch!  The former OU footballers could have spent 150 bucks for a so-called medical marijuana card and saved each one of them 300k in scholarship money but no let's just rob a kid for 3 joints and a black and mild!  As Forest Gump said once ‘Stupid says what stupid does, or something like that!

Center Boccia Ball Team Going to Rocklahoma!!

Boccia Superstars such as Spencer - ‘chicks dig me’, Sherri - ,beat me and I will rip your throat out, D’Andre- ‘I chase cute trainees’, Lee and Victoria - ‘we met playing boccia love birds’ and of course, Stephanie ‘hush Bryan, were all in the running for gold this year!!  B in T finished 17th out of 23, personal best!!  Glad to announce that no one was kicked out of the tournament for belching during a boccia ball throw like last year!!  I would like to thank our beautiful, smart, and generous Center Director for agreeing to let the Center Boccia team go to Rocklahoma!!  This trip includes transportation on Center bus #2, to and from the Pryor concert, 1 keg of Old Milwaukee Lite, mosh pit passes for ten, backstage passes to rock legends Puddle of Mud (BYOB - bring your own bong), sack lunch of Margie’s ham sandwiches, and finally, each of us will have the number of a local Pryor Bail bondsman!!  What a great package for the boccia team!!

College Athletes Now Get ‘Likeness Money”!!-

College football players can now do their own deals!!  OU’s Spencer Rattler and Canes Chicken inked a deal that allows Spencer and his offspring chicken nuggets till the year 2100!!  At Oklahoma State, all football players who wear a mullet by ‘Wigs by Francisco’ will get paid 35 dollars a month!!  The University of Tulsa football player, Jaxon Player, has inked a deal with Tulsa’s Coney Islander to do autograph signings once a month including when signed by an NFL team!!  Mr. Player’s compensation is reportedly between 10k to 15k Coney dogs!!  

B in T Mood Swings:

Mrs. B in T told Mr. B in T that he needs to level his moodiness quickly or he will show up missing on a True Detective TV show!  She explained that Mr. B in T needs to start writing and his moods will be happy!  Mrs. B in T is always right!!  Suck it up buttercup B in T!

B in T’s Bias is Deserved!!

Simply stated I have loyalty to the Tulsa Golden Hurricane football and numerous Oklahoma high school football including the Cushing Tigers football team where my nephews have raised havoc over 4A District 3!!  I have projected Cushing to be rated #2 in 4A this year and 13th in the B in T top 25 coming out in two weeks!!  So forgive me for indulging my homerism!!  Go Tigers!!  Hehehe

All-Star Game ho-hum:

I do not know two-thirds of the players in this year's All-Star game won by the American League 5-2 for the umpteenth time in a row!!  Lost track but who cares!  I believe that the American League wins every year points directly to a conspiracy theory similar to the UFO stuff and the U.S. Government!!  Cracking down on spitter pitchers in MLB is also part of a government conspiracy to make the game last longer thus selling more ads, makes more money in the U.S. economy this the government saves the day!!  Conspiracy yep!  NOTE:  I have reread this 3 or 4 times and I have no idea what the purpose or reason I wrote this!  

2021 College Football Coaches on HOT SEAT🔥🔥!!

1. Ed Orgeron - LSU - he reminds me of a mob boss friend of mine!  Time to fly Ed!!
2. Herm Edwards - Arizona State -  lost by 70 to a conference rival!  Such a nice man to be removed at halftime of a game!!  May happen in 2021!
3. Scott Frost - Nebraska - after Oklahoma hangs half a Hondo on the Cornshuckers at halftime watch for the alums to start ringing Bo Pelini’s flip phone!!  Anyone but Frost!
4. Jim Harbaugh- Michigan - Cocky Coach khaki has underperformed more than the Michigan Fab Five grade point back in the day!!  
5. Justin Fuente - Virginia Tech - Great guy, super background (Union Tulsa QB) but we are not rushing Justin for a fraternity.  His record has been average for many years and if average in 2021 he may be on the TU shortlist for OC in 2022!

B in T Projection:

Covid numbers are starting to spike up mainly with those individuals who have NOT been vaccinated.  My projection is if you want to attend a college football game in 2021 you must be vaccinated!  Just sayin’!  Thanks, Missouri and Arkansas for spreading to our state!!  My beloved University of Tulsa announced that they will now accommodate 100 % seating capacity for 2021 football and basketball!!  I love my Golden Hurricane’s optimism but the last time we had a sellout at Skelly was in 1975 for the Nathan Hale vs. Booker T Washington high school playoff game!!  

Big 12 Media Day hot topic for 2021:

No media members of the Big 12 were interested in talking x’s and o’s at Oklahoma State last week!!  All questions were regarding coach Gundy’s chopped-off mullet and what fricken animal was on the top of his new hairdo!!  Possible a hedgehog 🦔?  He mentioned that his team will beat TU by 50 points!!  Bulletin board material for the Golden Hurricane!!

BTW:

By the way (BTW) - I am writing sports crap without a contract this year!  

BTW - Bob Bolesby, President of the Big 12 Conference, also known as Bob No balls be is leaving OU hanging!!  Superstar A.D. Castiglione simply wants a game-time changed and is denied by Bob Ballsbegone!

BTW - Will the new Space Jam lead me to start possibly having to like big head LeBron?

Have a great sports week!

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org

B, in T

Sponsors: Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson & Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc. Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL) Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK) MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO) Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK Dr. Richard Stephens DDS Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

Soon, B in T Picks will be BACK!

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

I AM BAAAAAAACK!!

B in T has been out for a few weeks!!   Yes, I know that no one noticed I was not writing, but to all 7 fans that noticed have a case of Old Milwaukee beer headed your way in the mail!! Seriously yes!  I was actually on a month-long trip to the Kiamichi Mountains to look for Sasquatch, Bigfoot, and the Flo on Progressive commercials!!

The following has happened since my hibernation in the mountains:

Tulsa’s Zaven Collins was drafted 16th in round 1 by my new favorite besties team, The Arizona Cardinals!!  Zaven looked great in rookie camp and won the rookie talent show by using Kyler Murray as a puppet on his knee!!