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FOS Notes ’bout nuthin:
Faked Out Sports is About Fake Sports!! Duh! Other Faked Shat!
Fake News- Trump?
Fake Sports- B in T?
Fake Boobs- self-explanatory!
Fake Hair- Bill Self?
Fake I.D. - I just took a pole and all 4 of my grown kids have had one, oh what a surprise, oh we are such bad parents. Oh wait Mr. and Mrs. B in T did too!
Fake Orgasms - no comment
Fake Eye Lashes - Kardashians have closets full of fake shat!!
Fake Baked Christmas Cookies - smell weird and leave you feeling very spirited and hungry for more......and, more!!
🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️⛄️☃️☃️🎁🎄🎄🎄🎶🎁🎁🎁🎁🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲
Is KOTV’s Leanne Taylor The Real Mrs. Santa Clause?
Has anyone ever, ever seen the two of them in the same room? Hmmm?
Leanne’s house decorations look like they came from the North Pole!! Check it out!
Leanne hands out Chocolate Cocoa to the kids every night starting December 1st!! Look at the empty Hersheys Cocoa boxes in her trash containers!
Leanne is reportedly shopping Pet Smart for Reindeer feed and treats!! Hmmm!
Leanne’s cheeks get rosier the closier it gets to Christmas Day!!
Leanne took 5 pairs of men’s red pants to a local seamstress to let the waist out!! Hmmm!!
Leanne has been spotted in NAPA Auto Parts ordering sleigh engine fusion parts!!
I am just sayin’!!
Impeachment Smeachment!
During the impeachment hearings, I turned down the sound and played Christmas music!! Is that bad? Is that unpatriotic? I left the video on just in case the Republicans and the Democrats broke into a wrestling donnybrook!!
B in T PRESENTS: Mason Rudolph vs Myles Garrett, A Charity Boxing Match Which Will Bring 1,000s of Toys for Tots!!
Mason, who looks very similar to Jethro Bodine of the Beverly Hill Billies, has agreed to the boxing match but his agent says they must use NERF boxing gloves! Myles and his agent prefer to go bare knuckles but will use anything as long as they get a shot at the ’soft honky’! If the players agree to the bout their fines will be expunged and they will be allowed to participate in all reindeer games next year, according to the NFL!!
FOS Bobbleheads:
B in T’s Grandchild Basketball Team Just Needs One Recruit!!
The B in T Grandchild Fab 5 just had its 4th recruit added to his recruiting class with a healthy female point guard from Jordan and Clark!! Rosie entered the world smallish but with the ability to crossover dribble with either hand in her seventh day on earth!! No shat!! We are heavily recruiting a Center/Aircraft carrier for the 5th of the B in T Grandchild Fab 5!! Lance and Keli have made a verbal commit with Charlotte and will officially sign-on February 5th or around the date, depending on the stork flight schedules!! I believe in Santa Clause, Storks delivering babies and TU going to a major bowl in 2020!!
FOS College Picks:
Navy 42 Army 24
This game is not being played on top of the U.S.S. Iowa like TMZ reported!! These two teams believe in option running game, winning the time of possession, old Green Bay Packer 3 yards and a cloud of dust and no turnovers!! The average weight of both offensive lines is 279 lbs which due to military requirements makes these trimmed up dudes badass blockers!!
FOS CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP PICKS:
🏆🏆🏆Big 10 Championship
Ohio State 47 Wisconsin 27
Buckeye QB Justin Fields is bothered by an undisclosed knee problem for the Big 10 Championship game against the Badgers!! The Buckeyes have so much depth and talent on this semi-pro team that B in T could play QB and Howdy Doody of the Dallas Cowboys could coach and Ohio State would still beat the Badgers by a touchdown!!
🏆🏆🏆SEC Championship
LSU 34 Georgia 27
LSU Coach Orgeron was very upset when his players and some Georgia players got into a pregame scuttle which turned into a melee!! Evidently the LSU Tiger’s mascot was depants by some Bulldog players!! Six players for Georgia will be suspended for the first half of their bowl game against OU!!!
🏆🏆🏆Mountain West Championship
Boise State 45 Hawaii 24
Boise State and Hawaii have numerous Samoan recruits of which some are currently in the NFL! Boise State Quarterback Jaylon Henderson is not Samoan but led his team to a complete victory over the Hawaii Rainbow Trouts!!
🏆🏆🏆Big 12 Dr. Pepper Championship
Oklahoma 48 Baylor 41
The Oklahoma Sooner Schooner was put on a temporary ban on the wagon in Oklahoma but not in Arlington, Texas!! The new Schooner made its debut after OU scored a touchdown!! Out of the corner of the AT&T stadium came 6 giant Clydesdales with a red tank-like wagon surrounded by the Rufneks and OU male cheerleaders only!! The OU Regents voted and stated that the new OU wagon tank could not exceed 3.5 miles per hour!!
A tad bit slower than C.D. Lamb!! The wagon tank has 3 roll bars made out of titanium like substance from Mars!! No shat!! Ok, OU’s offense and QB Hurts only stopped themselves and had no need for a punter to the dismay of the Baylor defenders!!
🏆🏆🏆American Athletic Conference
Championship
Memphis 42 Cincinnati 38
The new member of the Super 6 in 2022, American Athletic Conference’s top dog Memphis, will play in a New Year's Day Bowl with a win, again, over the Bearcats!!
🏆🏆🏆ACC Championship Game:
Bank of America Stadium Charlotte, North Carolina
Clemson 44 Virginia 23
The Hippie QB for Clemson threw for 3 touchdowns before the Cavalier fans could get to their seats!! For almost am hour, Hippie QB was seen signing young ladies Clairol Shampoo bottles!! Ho-hum and a bottle of rum for the Clemson fans as they get ready for the College Football Playoffs!!
FOS College Basketball Picks!
Oklahoma 77 at North Texas 67
Austin Reeves, a transfer from Wichita State, reminds me of a cross between Pistol Pete Maravich and Larry Bird on a smaller scale, kinda, maybe, somewhat!!. The young man is a real good addition to the Sooners and puts them in the top 5 of the Big
12!
Tulsa 75 Arkansas State 70
The Golden Hurricane basketball team is doing a good job of taking care of business at home with 6 wins so far this year!! Superstud transfer Brandon Rachal, a 6’6” power forward from Louisiana, scored 25 points with 8 for 10 shooting!! The Red Wolves of Arkansas State were 13-19 in 2018-19 but have 9 underclassmen back and look to fight with the upper half of the Sunbelt Conference! The Red Wolf is almost extinct and is located in the Southeastern, United States and has an awful aroma after rummaging through dirty diapers at a daycare center!!
Kansas 88 Colorado 71
Kansas Coach Self plays the high low offense with two seven-foot aircraft carriers while texting his stockbrokers while his assistants do the coaching!! Ho hum day for Hollywood Self!!
Kansas Coach Self plays the high low offense with two seven-foot aircraft carriers while texting his stockbrokers while his assistants do the coaching!! Ho hum day for Hollywood Self!!
Oklahoma State 70 Wichita State 67
Oklahoma State’s two freshmen from Memorial High School in Tulsa, Kalib and Keylon Boone are becoming adjusted to college basketball and scored 10 and 8 points respectively!!
Oral Roberts 91 Haskell 57
ORU is looking good after a monstrous non-conference schedule! The Golden Eagles scheduled the Haskell Haymakers High School this week and will play the Bishop Kelley Comets JV next week! Serious.............google it!
FOS High School Finals Picks:
6AI Championship
Owasso 44 Jenks 20
The Owasso tight end Mario Kirby is averaging 70 yards a catch and more of the same this night!! Kirby caught 2 passes for 154 yards and 2 touchdowns!! The city of Owasso closed downtown the following Monday with a parade!! The Ram football team road in two double-decker busses, while the coaches wore white tuxedos with red cummerbunds, in large white and red wagons pulled by 30 Norwegian Rams!!
6AII Championship
Bixby 46 Stillwater 30
The Spartans have created a 6AII dynasty monster but next year they will get to play the Jenks and Union big boys in 6AI!! Stillwater quarterback Gunner ’son of Gundy’ Gundy, threw 3 interceptions but had 3 touchdowns! His dad picked him up immediately after the game and made him throw 500 passes through a tire swing off a tree limb in the backyard!! Somewhat miffed at dad, the coach Gundy, son of Gundy, immediately signed to play football with Kansas University!!
5A Championship
Carl Albert 36 Bishop McGuiness 27
Carl Albert football helped design the Gold Ball Trophy since they have so fricking many of them! Simply get a football and paint it gold! The problem is winning enough games to get the Gold Ball and Carl Albert is really good at that!! The Irish of McGuiness has more D1 recruits than my Golden Hurricane!! Hmmm, I wonder where the Irish get their D1 recruits from?! Uncle Howard raised his Carl Albert flag high and proud!! I envy my Uncle Howard for being so very high and proud!
FOS NFL Picks:
Cowboys 34 at Bears 20
The Bears Quarterback Mitchell Trubinsky seems to get a better ovation when he is injured this year than when he is announced in the starting lineup!! Very sad!! Trubinsky’s 9 touchdowns and 4 interceptions are not exciting!! The problem with Trub is that he averages 4 yards per completion!! He is 30th in QB rating!! The Cowboys Dak Prescott is first!! No shat!!
Browns 35 Bengals 17
The Bengals have canceled their trip to Mexico next year and will instead play Owasso High school in an attempt to actually have a fricking chance to win!! MAYBE! Playing the Bengals twice a year will not save Kitchens's job! Change the uniforms please!
Patriots 28 Chiefs 17
The Patriots defense, which I know none of their names, slow down Mahomes with their blitzing!! The Patriots players were mocking Mahomes high pitched voice by calling out defensive signals in a Kermit the Frog voice! No class! Shocking!!
Texans 32 Broncos 21
The Texans seem to be good one week and bad the next week!! Texan Wideout Deandre Hopkins is averaging 10 yards a reception but catches 8 passes for 157 yards against the Bronco defense!! The Broncos are still using grocery stockers from Homeland as their quarterback!! Keep the QBs coming President Elway!!
The Texans seem to be good one week and bad the next week!! Texan Wideout Deandre Hopkins is averaging 10 yards a reception but catches 8 passes for 157 yards against the Bronco defense!! The Broncos are still using grocery stockers from Homeland as their quarterback!! Keep the QBs coming President Elway!!
Cardinals 35 Steelers 27
Ex OU Sooner QB Kyler Murray versus ex OSU Cowboy QB Mason Rudolf!! Both quarterbacks are still trying to find their way around the NFL with short dink passes!! Dink dink here, dink dink there, everywhere a dink dink, old McMurray had a pass!! I digress. Kyler Murray may sew up the Rookie of the Year at this game!! He completes 23 of 30 passes for 265 yards, 2 scores and runs for a touchdown!!
Words of wisdom from the unwise one!
Never request grilled hamburgers 🍔from your loved one when it is snowing outside!
Have a great sports week!!
Dilly Dilly!!
FOS / B in T
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B, in T
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