B in T/FOS
FOS Notes ’bout Nuthin!
The Elf on the Shelf is CREEPY!
🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶🤶
FOS Research Team Has Discovered Some Interesting Little Known Facts About The Elf On The Shelf!!
- The Elf on the Shelf is a distant relative of CHUCKY the doll!!
- The Elf on the Shelf’s eyes will follow you all over the house!! Trust me I just now tried it!! Scary shat bro!
- The Elf on the Shelf that existed when B in T was a young B in T, are at my grandkids houses NOW!! How did they fricking get there!! Very eeerrie!!
- The Elf on the Shelf watches the kids and sends naughty or nice reports daily to Santa via their tiny, itty-bitty cell phones!! True shat! Google it!! I dare u!
- The Elf on the Shelf is not potty trained! So, red and green Hershey’s Chocolates may not be what they seem!!
- The Elf on the Shelf does resemble a young boy Donnie Trump!! But young Donnie looks more like a Chucky doll!!
- The Elf on the Shelf can be transgender!! As long as they get their list of naughty and nice to the Santa team by midnight each evening until December 23rd!!
- Is The Elf on the Shelf simply a Christmas Elf from the North Pole that is earning his pointy ears before working in the Toy Workshop?? Or is he sent to sit on the Shelf for a period of time as punishment for default toy making?
- The Elf on the Shelf has been hired by the Houston Astros to steal signs!!
- Elf shat - what you look for when tracking Elves in the forest!!
Watch out for the Elf!!
Non-Sports Related Stuff:
Will the chicks on Sex in the City still be doing remakes in 10 years when they are all 90 years old? God, I hope not! I never thought they were hot in their prime, if you could call it that!!
If you are a Tulsa Police Officer and you needed to make a ticket-writing quota by the end of November just go to any Walmart and hang around the handicap parking area on Black Friday! As a handicapped smart ass dude myself, I would personally buy dinner, purchase hot chocolate or coffee, wash and wax their squad cars, shine their shoes and give them copies of B in T Faked Out Sports if they would write tickets to the fine quality individuals who park their worthless lazy butts in the handicap parking in a very large Walmart on south Lewis!! With no sign of a handicap tag anywhere!! This gripe session was paid for by anyone but Donald Trump for president!! Seriously, I would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas!! 🎁🎄🌲🌲☃️☃️☃️🎁🎁🎁
FOS Short List for Next Razorback Head Coach:
Sam Pittman OL Coach Georgia- Long shot, very boring and unemotional at interview! 100 to 1 chance of getting any coaching job in Arkansas!
Lane Kiffin HC- Florida Atlantic has requested his own hairstylist as part of his contract! Ole Miss nabs him! Too late Razorbacks!!
Lane Kiffin HC- Florida Atlantic has requested his own hairstylist as part of his contract! Ole Miss nabs him! Too late Razorbacks!!
Houston Nutt - has applied for every division one head coaching college football job for the last 4 years!! He did not pass Hog test!!
Keith Burns- (currently working for a Hummer Dealership) He did not pass Hog test!
Mike Leach (Washington State) - he was a frontrunner with the Razorback brass but regressed when he started speaking about living on Mars in the middle of an interview!! He did not pass the Hog test!!
Seth Littrell (North Texas) on every coaching list with Houston Nutt, but has much better odds than the Nutt!
Jason Garrett (fired coach walking, Dallas Cowboys) please hire him, PLEASE! Passed all Razorback tests but smelled funny in interviews!!
Mike Norvell (Memphis HC) - super candidate, my favorite pick with Keith Burns! Hire by Florida State!!
Barry Lunney Junior (Interim HC Arkansas) - favorite son of the Razorbacks, was starting QB for the Hogs in the mid-90s for 40 games!! Passed all tests but not a big enough name for the Razorback mucketty mucks!!
B in T TV Watching Dilemma!!
- Watch the my Dallas Cowboys play the Chicago Bears with the worst coach in the history of football!
OR
2. Watch Saturday Night Live
Christmas Special with Mrs.
B in T by the fireplace with hopes
of headphones for Mr. B in T in
the air!!
Went with number 2, no headphones from Mrs. B in T, just exercise pants but a great evening by the fireplace!!
FOS Bobbleheads!
I was very excited to see my little Ana’s 3-year-old ballet recital recently!! Watching the other parents was very entertaining!! College football’s big offensive linemen use ballet at times to help their feet work and make them feel lighter on their tippy-toes!! Little Ana was perfect in her very special ballet performance!! A lot of ballet experts say that a tomboy child-like Ana will not be long for the ballet world!! Papa B in T says Ana will do what makes her happy! Shown below in middle!
FOS College Football Picks:
Navy 42 Army 24
This game is not being played on top of the U.S.S. Iowa like TMZ reported!! These two teams believe in option running game, winning the time of possession, old Green Bay Packer 3 yards and a cloud of dust and no turnovers!! The average weight of both offensive lines is 279 lbs which due to military requirements makes these trimmed up dudes badass blockers!!
FOS College Basketball Picks!
Iowa State 88 Iowa 82. The Corn Cy-Hawk Maple Syrup Invitational-
This is a fundraiser for corn crops around America that have had monetary damage by President Trump or physical damage by alien crop circles!! One-half of the tickets purchased by at the game will go to the corn farmers damaged by Aliens whether they are an alien Trumper or a real live Alien!! Great game and speed beats tall and slow everytime!!
Arkansas 78 Tulsa 68
The Hogs are now led by super new coach Eric Mussleman with some new transfers in and out upon the departure of Mike Anderson! Arkansas looks like a 20 - 10 team this year and 8- 10 in SEC play!! NIT probably!! Tulsa really needs to pick up their game! The TU crowds of 3 thousand (B in T is one of them) are getting more sparse each year!! A nice road win at Vanderbilt, Kansas State or Hog land would make the TU fans more regular!!
Perhaps more fiber in their diet would help be regular as well!
Tennessee 79 Memphis 70
The Volunteers shooting and the fact that superstud James Wideman is suspended for 12 games due to $12,500 dollars found in his mattress!! A note on the money said ’to my besty James from your future coach Hadaway’!! Hope TU plays the Tigers, minus the NBA lottery pick!! If the FBI, NCAA and the CIA are not opening large files on Penny Hardaway right now, they will soon!!
Wichita 77 Oklahoma 71
The Wheat Shockers played meany hosts to the Sooners!! Panic at the Koch Arena happened when WuShock the Wichita mascot wheat hair caught fire and burned his scalp!! True story, Wichita Chronicle! State outlast the Sooners and outshoots them 58.3% to 44.6% from the field!
ORU 90 Central State Orthopedics 56
ORU smothers the Orthopedics with smooth shooting from the 3 point area and blocking 11 shots of the much shorter opponents!!
Houston 79 Oklahoma State 78
Houston Coach Kelvin Sampson had many battles with the Cowboys back in his days as the Oklahoma Sooners head coach!! New Oklahoma coach Mike Boynton Jr. is no Eddie Sutton but has recruited some Sutton type athletes and will play defense like crazed dogs!! The freshmen Boone twins are starting to get the hang of major college ball as they both scored in double figures!! But the Cougars and Sampson were too strong and made their free throws at the end!!
FOS NFL Picks!
Chiefs 31 Broncos 17
The Chiefs tight end Kelce is a football catching badass and runs over defenders like they are Smurfs!! He is so hard to tackle that he looks like Jerome Bettis in the GEICO flag football commercial!
Cardinals 33 Browns 27
Cardinals Kyler Murray can run a Kinsbury offense and Baker Mayfield can run his mouth!! In Oklahoma, we love them both and want to have their babies!! Unless you are a male or a fan, maybe not in that order! Cardinals defense did not stop Baker but play-calling and turnovers did!!
Cowboys 35 Rams 24
The Cowboys and coach Howdy Doody back into another first-round playoff round loss!! Urban and Lincoln were seen in the guest house of Cowboy owner Jerry Jones!! TMZ and B in T reported!
Texans 27 at Titans 21
Texans are ready for the playoffs and another first-round exit! The Houston Texans, like the baseball Astros, are caught with cameras in the Texan Cheerleaders powder room where numerous cheerleaders were seen fully dressed with NO makeup on!! True shat!! TMZ is offering the pictures for $125,000!!
FOS Words of wisdom from the unwise one!!
Never Facetime your daughter while she is pumping milk for your newborn beautiful granddaughter!!
Have a great sports week!
Dilly Dilly!
FOS/B in T
 |
B, in T
|
No comments:
Post a Comment