Brian Bosworth On The OU Coaching Staff?/ NFL Playoff Picks!

LISTEN TO BARRY, LINCOLN!!!!

Oklahoma Sooner legend Barry Switzer stated to Lincoln Riley, who is being courted by NFL teams, ”More coaches would want the job that you just left than the one you just took”!!  Didn't Switzer take the Dallas Cowboy coaching job??

I would like to suggest that Joe Castiglione and Lincoln Riley consider Fansville Sherrif Brian Bosworth as the next Defensive Coordinator at OU!!  The Boz added an in-depth analysis regarding the OU D, as the ESPN Gameday Guest Picker!!

B in T’s wife has left to Maui and like the Christmas holiday show, I am home alone!!!  My wife and her friend will meet Tonga, the native heart throb from Kuau and dance to many Hawaiian songs like Tiny Bubbles, and the Hawaii Five-O theme song!!  Girls, please bring me back a couple of Hawaiian leis!!

FOS NFL Second Round Playoff Picks

NFC Playoffs

Dallas 28 Los Angeles Rams 27

The Dallas Cowboys and Dax Prescott have finally won back to back playoff games for the first time since Dandy Don Meredith sang ’Turn out the lights the party is over’!!  Cowboy owner Jerry Jones bought up thirty thousand tickets from the Los Angeles Coliseum and sold them to Dallas fans who were making the trip with only a 40% mark up!!  That shrewd piece of crap owner!!

QB Prescott was 17 for 24 with 3 touchdowns!!  Amari Cooper caught 7 passes for 121 yards and 1 TD!  Ezekiel

Elliott ran for 118 yards and 1 TD and was caught after the game doing his eat em up act with owner Jerry Jones!! Enough is enough, please stop!!

New Orleans 31 Philadelphia 24

Drew Brees gets better with age!!  Saint running backs Mark Ingram Jr. and Alvin Camera are the best one, two punch in the NFL!!  The Saint crowd registered a 103.73 on the seismic indoor fan noise scale!!  Last time it was that high was at a Godsmack concert when a nude girl fell into a mud mosh pit!!  The Eagles tried a repeat of 2017 but came up short when QB Foles threw his 2nd interception with a 1:32 left!!

AFC Playoffs

New England 34 Chargers 27

Night before game meal for Tommy Brady family with wife Gisele and two lovely children, is at 5-star restaurant L’Esparle where their total bill was $1,267.34 plus tip!!  While Charger QB Rivers, his wife and 9 kids are at the local Chucky Cheese for kids eat for free night!!  The bill came $32.28 but Mrs. Rivers had a 5 dollar off coupon from Value Pack!!!  Brady’s short passing game doomed the Charger defense and reminded the world that New England and Mr. Brady aren't done yet!!

Kansas City 34 Indianapolis 23

Chiefs have lost 6 playoff games in a row so they are due to beat the Colts and Andrew not so Lucky this year!!  Both Quarterbacks can nock a fly off a horses ass from 150 yards, similar to Jed Clampett on the Beverly Hill Billies!!  Maholmes cannon-like arm and accuracy helped him throw for 341 yards and 4 touchdowns!!  Tyreke Hill who reminds me of Super Hero Ant-Man and the hands of Spiderman!!

Words of wisdom by B in T:

Never overreact to the words of local weatherman!!  You might end up with a garage full of, toilet paper, snow shovels, rock salt, tire chains, and generators!!

Have a super sports week!!

B in T

B, in T

FOS New Year Resolutions/College Ball Picks

Faked Out Sports 2019 version!

2019 New Years Resolutions!!

1. In 2019 I will write all my sports crap while sober!!
2. In 2019 I will lose weight!!
3. In 2019 I will try to get published again!!  Thank you to Sooner Politics!!
4. In 2019 I will attend a Bowl Game that Tulsa University is playing in!!  
5. In 2019 I will not let tooties in the bed that my wife can hear!!
6. In 2019 I will not curse around my grandkids this year!!  The rest of the world is free game!!
7. In 2019 I will not taunt my bocce ball opponents!!  I will not say ”you suck” or ”nice shot ass face” or ”I have won the Center championship two out of three years bitches”!!  I promise never to say those things in 2019!!
8. In 2019 I will get my Medical Marianna Card!!  My Cocaine Card!! My Qualude Card!!  
9. In 2019 I will eat all my fiber bars daily!!
10. In 2019 I will attempt to do exactly what my wife tells me, to the best of my ability, so help me God!!  Dilly Dilly!!

The Aquaman dude and Steven Adams of the OKC Thunder are fuuurrricking look a likes!!

I recently learned that in the Grand Slam of Darts, one finalist accused another of malevolent flatulence (farting)!!!  He stated that the odor was similar to rotten eggs!!  Moral of this true story is fart while throwing a dart!!

FOS College Basketball Picks!

Arkansas 79 LSU 78

Great game in Fayetteville!!  Coach Anderson had ex-Coach Nolan Richardson back to conduct some practices!!  The players hated his practices but loved some of the pictures he showed off!!  His polka dot shirts and jackets back in the early Tulsa and Arkansas days were the hit of the practices!!

Kansas State 73 Iowa State 69

Clone Coach Prohm has more talent than some NBA teams!!  How he gets that talent to cold and boring Des Moines, Iowa is a question that seems to be one step ahead of NCAA investigators!!  The Wildcat talent without forward Dean Wade is enough to bring home the victory to a great home crown in Manhattan!!  If the Cats score more than 70 points everyone with a ticket to the game gets a free Corn on the Cobb at Charlies Chicken!!!

Oklahoma 82 TCU 72

The return of Top Daug in Norman was greeted with some excitement as the Horned Frog mascot and Top Dawg engaged in a slap fight!!  All was fun and games until Top Dawg was hit with a low blow!!  Male cheerleaders from OU and security broke up the mele and the game continued!!

West Virginia 83 OSU 68

West Virginia coach Huggy Bear was given a technical when his stomach bumped the head official and caused him to fall on the court!!  The official’s Addidas Whistle was missing and a substitute whistle was used!!  The whistle is said to be located somewhere on Huggins but no other comments were made by the West Virginia Athletic department!! 

Tulsa 71 SMU 69

This was a hard fought game in the Ewing Center, in Dallas named after famed Oil Tycoon J.R. Ewing!!  Numerous fouls and ejections in the game!!  The fans got into it when a TU Senior Hurricane Happy Timer started pushing a SMU Senior Pony Express patron when one lady spilled popcorn on the lap of her husband and started wiping his groinal area!!  Ewing Center Security quickly ended the tussle and bought the whole section popcorn!!  Oh, and TU gets a big road win!!

South Dakota State 77 ORU 70

The ORU team is a huge disadvantage in this league when they have to leave the Oklahoma mild weather plains and head to  Antartica and play basketball in the shorts!!  Not fair!!  These two teams are the best of the conference and we will see SD State in Tulsa!!

B, in T

Super Bowl Performers Wanted/ College Football Championship Game Pick!

Job Posting:  Super Bowl Performers!

The halftime show for the Super Bowl will be starring Marroon 5!  Other bands to accompany Marroon 5 have been tough to book!!  A total of forty-six performers have rejected the halftime show!!  The stance taken by Colin Kaepernik of kneeling for the National Anthem and the eventual blackballing measure by Commissioner Goodell has the Hollywood circuit very agitated.   Here is a list of some of the remaining performers under consideration:

1. Ted Nugent- He has the cat scratch fever to be in this halftime show!!
2. Beach Boys, accompanied with Dolly Pardon as Wonder Woman!  Longshot!!
3. Oklahoman Ventriloquist/Singer Darcy Lynne has been approached for the halftime show!!  Her production staff is attempting to make President Trump and Commissioner Goodell puppets but evidently, their heads are too big for little Darcy to hold up!!
4. Steven Tyler of Aerosmith, accompanied by his lips, is under consideration!!  
5. G.A.P. Band (Greenwood, Archer and Pine streets) out of Tulsa, Ok was high on the list!  They backed out when the Super Bowl security would not allow them to sing ’You Dropped a Bomb on Me Baby’!! 

FOS College Football Championship!!

Alabama 42 Clemson 32
Alabama put OU Coach Riley the B lists of clubs looking for hot coaching prospects!!  The Clemson freshman pretty boy QB Trevor Lawrence could play in broadway’s hit Hamilton!!  His long hair was grabbed twice by Alabama’s all world Defensive tackle Quinnen Williams for losses!!  The tide DT would have had a third hair tackle but Lawrence’s hair was too greasy and unmanageable!!  Tide via Tulsa McClain running back Joshua Jacobs ran over the Clemson Defense for 110 yards!!  Alabama QB Tua passed for 270 yards and 3 touchdowns and was named player of the game!!  While Tua was accepting the MVP trophy after the game back-up QB Jalen Hurd announced he was Graduate transferring to Oklahoma and would be eligible immediately!!  Great news for OU fans everywhere!!

FOS Pro Football Playoff Picks 

Wildcard Games!!

Dallas 27 Seattle 24

The Dallas Cowboys have not won a playoff game since owner Jerry Jones first facelift!!  Dallas’ new secret weapon TE Darwin Jarwin from Oklahoma State, catches another touchdown pass from Dax Prescott!!  Another former OSU Cowboy, Seattle RB Chris Carson, gained 88 yards on 20 carries against the Dallas stout front 7!!  The Cowboys hit the wagon trail on the road with Jerry Johnson coaching the horses and the offensive line in charge of the chuck wagon and vittles!!

Chicago 24 Philadelphia 16

The Chicago Bears pass rush dominated the Eagles!!  Bears DE Khalil Mack was in the Eagle backfield so often that Eagle QB Foles invited him to their halftime locker room!!  True story!!  Not really!!  Seriously true story!!  Chicago Trubinsky went straight from weightlifting to the field with his weight belt still on!!  Some of his Bear teammates giggled at him but stopped when he threatened to snap their collar bone!! 

San Diego 31 Baltimore 24

Chargers QB Phillip Rivers, not to be confused with Dan Fouts, throws for a late touchdown pass and takes a road win at Baltimore!!  The crowd was heard yell we want Flacco!!  I am afraid Flacco will be the starting QB for the Denver Broncos or the Calgary Stampeders next year!!

Houston 31 Indianapolis 21

Colts Quarterback Jaws Luck has had more protection by his O-line than Prez Trump Secret Service gives him!!  The Texans DL with Clowney and Watt were in Luck’s hip pocket all night!!  During a third-quarter heavy rush, JJ flexed his biceps and Luck passed out because of FEAR!!

I would like to leave you with these famous words that my Grandma Audoo used to tell me:

”Bryan get your hands away from my Folgers snuff spit can or I will spank your butt with my wooden spoon!”

Have a great week!!

B in T/ FOS

B, in T

Area Recruiting Classes Studly/ FOS College Ball Picks

Faked Out Sports!

Area Football Recruiting Classes Look Studly!!

Great recruiting class for OU and Arkansas!!  Top 6 recruiting class for Coach Riley and top 15 class for Chad Morris which was the Hoggies highest ranking ever!!  Oklahoma State was hovering around the 44th best and TU around 90th best recruiting class!!

Great news for FOS, myself and my wife along with 2 board members will be visiting 1 local restaurant and giving a FOS review!! 

The first 6 months will be the following : 

January:  LaSalle pie night, sounds a little snooty but hope it serves more than pie!!

February:  Smitty’s Garage, hamburgers, now we're talking!!

March:  White River Fish Market, fried fish, and hush puppies, note to self-check blood pressure after the meal!  Biggest hush puppy balls in America!!

April:  Jane’s Deli, bet they don't have cheese fries!  Wives picked this one!

May:  Food Hall, another wife deal, sounds like the campus cafeteria at TU!

June:  Shops at Warren Place, new restaurant to be named 61st and Yale!!  Please be a Mexican restaurant!!

I will give a review each month, please feel free to comment!!  

FOS College Basketball Picks

Texas A&M 79  Arkansas 75

The Aggies are not known for there basketball but the 2018/2019 team version is strong, deep and talented!!  

Kansas 88 Iowa State 81

Coach Self was very red faced at his battle with the Clones!!  This can mean that he had the four enchilada spicy platter at his favorite local Mexican restaurant or NCAA investigators or FBI dudes waiting for Coach after the game!!  Please medicate Bill!!  Cyclones local legend, Kevin Highland, Tulsa Mortgage Banker and friend of B in T was very upset about the officiating!!  In the mid-70s, Kevin averaged 15 a game!!  15 seconds a game that is!!

**********UPSET SPECIAL*************

Kansas State 71  Texas Tech 68  

Texas Tech played Duke and has been ranked as high as 12th in the nation!! The Wildcats are without their first team all-Big 12 hoss Dean Wade so a perfect upset pick!!  Tech has one of the nations top defenses but the Wildcats have length!!

Oklahoma 76 Oklahoma State 71

The Sooners are having a super year and Oklahoma State is still finding itself!!  Sooner big man Jimanji McNeace is starting to flex his muscle in the post with moves like Jagger!!  

Tulsa 70 South Florida 56

Tulsa 6’5” forward Dequan Jeffreys plays like he is 6’9”, scored nineteen points, eleven rebounds, and 5 dunks!!  Point guard Taplin is starting to get into form as AAC starts to heat up!!  Numerous fans headed to a big celebration party at the Golden Corral and were noticeably upset when the chocolate fountain was closed for repair!!!

ORU 78 North Dakota 71

ORU tall front line of four forwards is, 6’8”, 6’9”, 6’10” and 6’11!!  And a 6’ point guard!!  The North Dakota team is not as potent as it has been in the past and ORU plays strong at home so boogie on Golden Eagles!!  Freshman forward Deshang Weaver can go inside-outside and makes the ORU future bright!!

B, in T

Cardinals Obtain a Nugget With Goldschmidt!/ College BBall and NFL Picks

Faked Out Notes!!

Cardinals Obtain Muscle in Lineup!

The Redbirds obtained slugger Paul Goldfingers from Arizona for some Cardinal players that don’t really matter!!  Goldshmidt will play first base and Matt Carpenter will play this third base with his pop gun arm!!!  Cards lineup will be much more potent this year!!  The Cards are also trying to trade for Dodgers OF Cody Berlinger who played for the Tulsa Drillers before his call up to the Dodgers!!

FOS College Basketball Picks

Coach Weber Out Smarts Smart!!

Kansas State 70 Texas 65

Wildcat Coach Bruce Weber who looks like Leslie Nielsen of the movie series Airplane, simply out smarts Texas Coach Smart of Texas!!!  

Kansas 82 Oklahoma 75  Kansas who is playing without star big man Aduka Uzibuicki, but still has 5 five star and 2 six star McDonald All Americans to outlast the Sooners!!  The Sooners are the surprise team of the big 12 and the Jayhawks are the same basketball conquering giant from Lawrence, Kansas where Dorothy and Toto are from!!  Kansas' size, athleticism and ability to give players gifts and cash is tops in the nation!!

Iowa State 87 Oklahoma State 77

The Clones keep getting 4 star recruits from up East!!  I would go to Des Mainz, Iowa for a new Lexus and weed!!  FBI and NCAA investigators will not go to igloo land because of the cold!!  Clones 5 Star recruit from Queens, NY scores 35 to beat OSU, and Coach Boynton who does things the right way!!

Tulsa 75 Houston 74

*********First Upset Special 2019*******

Tulsa has won numerous close games this year and would have a huge road win against the 10-0 Cougars!!!  Big man Martins is becoming a dominant inside presence and has a AAC coming out party against Houston!!

Kentucky 89 Louisville 71

Big rivalry between Kentucky’s Calamari and Louisville’s future ex-coach, battle it out until Calamari brought out the money for the SEC referees!!  Kentucky pulled a second-half dunk a thon and won handily!!

Omaha 76 Oral Roberts 59

ORU seems to have a problem with any team that has 2 players over 6’10”!!  The Golden Eagles has some heighth but no meat on the bones!!  Guard play is getting better and with some home wins, momentum will be back at the Prayer Towers!!

FOS NFL Picks

Chiefs 38 Raiders 23

Chiefs run over the Raiders using their fifth string running back picked from Dr Pepper sales rep in the stands at Arrowhead Stadium!!  Raiders have actually won a couple of games under Gruden and are heading in the right direction!!

Cowboys 28 Giants 25

Cowboys are backing into the Eastern Conference Championship!!  The Giants and over the hill QB Elf Manning are as bad as the rest of the conference!!  Manning throws 3 picks and 1 pick 6!!  Dallas offense is awful!!  Thank God for their Defense!!

I will leave you with these words of wisdom:

Never go to Starbucks and order an Ariana Grande trying to be funny!! THERE IS A REAL DRINK BRANDED BY HER!!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

B in T/FOS

B, in T