Wednesday, April 5, 2023

Easter Bonnets are fashionably outdated....

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 Bryan in Tulsa


FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM


B in T Rants:

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Who loses their phone the most in 38 years of marriage - Husband or Wife?


Mrs. B in T  - called her phone to find her phone:

11,245 times lost in 38 years of marriage!  I have phone records and records of phone calls!  I have 4,731 pink fricking memo pad notes saved before cell phones even existed!!


*Where found-

*Toilet - lid was down!  Go figure!

*Purse - a very large purse!

*On top of the automobile- maybe not sure

*Restaurant - 80% of total   number above!

*papa’s favorite liquor store!

*her favorite seat couch crack!


Papa B in T

*10 times lost in 38 years of marriage 


*Where found:

-always up Papa’s bu_ _ crack

according to Mrs. B in T!

-in Papa’s Troy Aikman pajama pocket!

-next to the big screen remote

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Mrs. B in T losing first I IPhone 20 years ago!


Nicaraguan pitcher                 struck out three Detroit Tigers, bam, bam, bam, then after the game was signed to a Tiger contract for 2023 and ‘24!!  Looks like a movie to me!!


Joe Exotic running for President in 2024!! 

Looks like we will have found a candidate that is trustworthy and not senile!!

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Rumors abound regarding ORU starting a Division II football program with home games to be played at Victory Christian High football field!!  You may send in new ORU football nicknames care of B in T at PO Box 1, RR 1, Blackwell, OK!!


Names: so far-


*The Prayer Tower Powers

*Monks

*Friars Tucks

*Goliaths (my fav)

*Red Sea Parters

KEEP THOSE SUGGESTIONS COMING!

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The St Louis Cardinals' new cult hero from Japan is setting his native country on fire!!  Left-handed OF cranked a few homers for the Cards in 2022 at the major league club but is slated for starting in RF in 2023!!

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Nootbaar is the first non-Japan-born player ever to play for the Japanese national team!  He was born and raised in Los Angeles but is eligible to play for Japan because his mother, Kumiko, is from Higashi-Matsuyama, Saitama Prefecture!!  Nootbaar's middle name is Taylor-Tatsuji, and his maternal grandfather, Tatsuji Enokida, still lives in Higashi-Matsuyama!!  The Nootbaar Candybar will soon be on Shark Tank!  

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*He is currently on the 10-day IL


Taylor Swift's nightmare release with Ticketmaster was supplanted only by the Oklahoma spring game in 2023!!  With the debut if the Kylar Murray Heisman bust debut Ticketmaster was overrun by millions of Sooner fans to get this 15$ ticket!!  Crying Sooner fans all over the world were devastated to learn that Ticketmaster had oversold 200,000 tickets to the Sooner spring fling game!!  Taylor Swift fans at OU can't shake off bad blood with Ticketmaster!!

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My NCAA Bracket was so bad that my final score was defeated by the following:


*Mrs. B in T - didn't know she was in the frickin contest

*Three of my grandsons - baby Hans has not even been born!

*My Uncle Fred who passed away 37 years ago, not funny fam

*2345168espnbracketnerd

*7639214espncocainehead

*Mrs B in T’s old boyfriend from Blackwell, not sure how in the heck he entered into the contest!!


I have done my last bracket!

Ever!


Center News:

Boccia Ball update:

First of all thanks for all of those superstars who gave to help the team with their tournament trip costs!!  You have directly helped the Center for Individuals with Handicaps in Tulsa!!  Any complaints about the popcorn should be sent to P.O. Box ITSFORCHARITYBRO

RR 1, Blackwell, Ok

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Bobbleheads:

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B in T MLB


Cardinals

With the Redbirds farm system ranked in the top MLB 5, a number of local Post Dispatch folks are picking 20-year-old Jordan Walker to be the NL Rookie of the Year!!  The next 6’6” 250 lb Dave Winfield was seen using a bat as a toothpick during a spring game in early March!!  

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Cubs

Third baseman Patrick Wisdom as a cleanup hitter sparks little fire in AAA baseball and none in the majors!!  


Astros

Second baseman David Hensley is no Altuve cuddle doll but will be serviceable until the All-star break!!  Prayers for the tiniest thumb in Houston!


Dodgers 

The Dodgers are only the 10th highest payroll in 2023 at 179.1 million!  Astros and Rangers at 9th and 8th highest payrolls!! At the upper end of the spectrum with the big dog media markets of the Yankees and inthe Mets spending around 300 mil on payroll!!  


Royals 

The Royals' payroll has been the smallest in baseball but with the new injection of owner John Sherman in 2019 the spending sprockets have moved them up 10 spots!!


Rangers

Arlington, Texas can be hellishly hot in August, and that is when the Rangers start sweltering and tanking!!  


Brewers

Abner Uribe (named after Abner Doubleday) throws 103 MPH, and is destined for AA ball until he masters the strike zone!!



Have a great sports week:

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org





B, in T

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