Bryan in Tulsa
FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM
New to B in T:
The Center Scoop:
Nude Pickleball is highly recommended for folks like myself who are disabled physically! The feeling of freedom flows through you as you hit the ball with this massive paddle! Nude Pickleball has become a massive hit to all the retirement communities in Florida!! A full-fledged proposal for Nude Pickleball will be completed and presented to the Center Board in 10 days!! We are prepared for some sass from the board regarding nudity and are prepared to wear undergarments, tidy whites, thongs, or speedos! Stay tuned for the Center board and Wendy's counter-proposal!!
Dilly dilly!
B in T Rants bout nuthin’
Pac-12 commish George Kliavkoff visiting SMU Wednesday, sources say the Ponies are heading to the PAC-12!! San Diego State & SMU are the top Pac-12 expansion candidates! As a TU alum, I will miss the SMU rivalry!! But they will never take away my memories of puking in the SMU Lamba Chi attic two years in a row!! Oh, those were da days!! Bye-bye SMU!! π₯²π₯²
Can we get Jarred Hall, McDonald All American possible, TU signee for 2023, and the best high schooler in Tennessee, please do not sign with Wake Forest!!
Top 5 NCAA College Football
2022 Recruiting Budgets:
1. Georgia, $4.5 million
2. Texas A&M, $2.98 million
3. Tennessee, $2.92 million
4. Texas, $2.44 million
5. Alabama, $2.32 million
Others of interest:
- Oklahoma's $1.8 million
24. Oklahoma State $1.2 million
26. Arkansas $1.125 Million
89. Tulsa Union $189,000
98. Cascia Hall Tulsa $146,000
133. Tulsa University $99,000
Ozzie, Willie, and Vince!!
These 3 gentlemen made opposing pitchers shake in their booties while averaging 7.6 home runs a year!! “A walk to any of the 3 amigos below was as good as a triple” the late Jack Buck would say back a few decades ago!! How many know the last names of these St.Louis Cardinal stars?
..................times up Smith, McGee, and Coleman!
The Oklahoma City Thunder offense sucked last year, in fact, dead dog last, worst in the NBA or Mars!! Awwwww but wait: This this year, like sunshine and dew drops glimmering in the morning hours, the Thunder rank 11th (from 30th!) well above average!!! The Thunder’s stud 6th man, Isaiah Joe, leads the NBA in 3-point percent, is one reason the team is flourishing in 3s!! This is reminding me of an old Thunder team with Durant and Westbrook, and Harden off the bench for instant offense! Soon they may even start winning!
How many of my 16 readers are having Bacon-wrapped grasshoppers for the March Madness parties??
B in iT College Basketball
picks:
ORU 89 - any team bad enough to play 18-0 Summitt League king ORU in the first round - 52
Kentucky 78 at Arkansas 76
The Kentucky players were given a police escort after the controversial win!! The Kentucky coaches were on their own!! Don't worry, the coaches were later found at a local Fayetteville tavern!! The Tavern shall be nameless!!
TCU 74 at Oklahoma 71
Sooner Nation is reeling after the 6-7 football team and the 13-15 basketball team continues underachieving!! I have always said Oklahoma is a softball school!!
Oklahoma State 82 at Texas Tech 76
Oklahoma State and ORU are the shining stars of the once-prosperous college basketball state!! OSU plays with the Red Raiders for too long but won by 6 while leading by as many as 17!!
B in T MLB
Cardinals
New catcher Wilson Contreras, known as a powerful hitter with average defensive skills, is fitting in well with the Bird pitching staff!! Forty-something, future hall of famer Adam Wainwright, loves his grit and agility behind the plate for a big fella!! The Cardinal bats are a bit quiet in the spring after a week but it is early!
Cubs
Braves SS Dabny Swanson signed a big deal with the Cubbies and led all of the NL SSs with 27 home runs!! 177 million reasons for the Cubs to like this young man!
Rangers
A healthy utility player deluxe, Brad Miller will be crucial for the Rangers this year! Only playing sparingly after injuries in 2022 he should have a solid season after a new yoga/pilates workout in this off-season!
Royals
Time for Bobby Witt Jr. to flourish and be a leader for KC!!
Brewers
UCLA stud OF Garrett Miller hit two homers in his first spring game!! Watch out for this ie stud! 6’3” 228 lb Centerfielder is dope!
Dodgers
The Dodgers are loaded in the pitching department and have a hitting machine in OF Mookie Betts!! Belanger is gone and no longer a heartthrob to the young Dodger fans!! Male and female alike!
Astros
The Stros fans are having a ceremony to hang the 2022 World Championship Banner! The little train π in centerfield will raise the flag after each Stro homerun in 2023!
Have a great sports week:
B, in T |
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