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FOS Top College Football Folks Affected By Small Crowds or Empty Stadiums:
- Boy Scouts of America income from football program sales will drop drastically! Possible bankruptcy again and may have to get into the mint cookie business!
- Coke and Pepsi sales will drop like the Dow Jones if Biden becomes President!
- All folks that rely on work through the sale of concessions to supplement their income!!
- Numerous folks that cannot watch college football live and will be forced to watch football on the TV According to my Grandma Audoo, ’too much TV will put your eyes out, Bryan in Tulsa!’ Whence I received the nickname Bryan in Tulsa!
- Campaign managers for Trumpy and Mumbles Biden will lay off the folks that hand out the political pamphlets at games!
FOS College Football Picks:
Jami and I went to the Haunted Crescent Hotel last week and after a late night hunt and no personal paranormal encounters I was fixed on the late night news!! There I saw possibly the scariest thing ever on the Fayetville sports channel!! A local newscast showed the ex-motorcycle riding / hot 25-year-old blonde on the back, Bobby Petrino coaching Mizzou State!! Very fricking scary! Watch out, cheerleaders! At first glimpse, I thought Channel 9 of Fayetteville was showing a Union or Owasso warm-up but I then recognized it was OU’s first opponent!! The Sooners will hang a half a hundred on the Bears by half time in front of 19,567!! Heisman poses from Snake Rattler should be minimized! Reportedly seen on the sidelines were cardboard cutouts of Billy Sims and Toby Keith!!
Clemson 48 at Wake Forest 17
A number of preseason polls have Clemson and Coach Dabo as the projected #1 choice in college football!! Really, there are so many polls that if you do some serious research you will find the Rutgers Scarlets #1!! Clemson’s QB Lawrence has an arm that the NFL scouts love and can wing the football vet far!! Just wait till he gets some muscle tone in those little pistols!!
Number One Ranked
Notre Dame 41 Duke 13
Notre Dame 41 Duke 13
The Blue Devils were not welcome in the Catholic football field of Notre Dame!! The Devils and the Catholics fought early and often but the big boys recruited from every St. Something school in America dominated late!
Kansas State 42 Akansas State 20
The Red Wolves were close at halftime but the Mildcats of Manhattan covered the Vegas spread in the second half!!
TCU 52 SMU 32 (canceled but not on FOS!)
Texas Christian has the home-field advantage plus their head coach Gary Patterson has a country-western label song and more record sales than the number of Coronavirus fans in the stands! SMU is good and should battle in the AAC but the Horny Frogs are fast times fast!
FOS High School Picks:
Owasso 42 at Broken Arrow 34
The Ram parents had a small pregame party at Snorky’s bar and grill at the new yupster area in old downtown Broken Arrow! The parents were slightly snockered and arrived late where they sat on the BA side till halftime! At one point they realized they were on the wrong side of the field!! The Rams Football Club put the parents on clean up duty for two games AND took away their Ram Hats and Horns for one year!!
Blackwell 27 at Oklahoma Bible 24
The Maroons pulled off a huge upset against the Oklahoma Bible Thumpers in Enid, Oklahoma!! After the game the team stopped at a local Enid Sonic and decided to streak the Main Street in celebration!! The immature fun lasted two blocks when a few Blackwell parents saw the disturbing sight!! Thus endeth the streaking funeth!! True story!! I have Blackwell relatives and they never fib!!
Bishop McGinnis 31 Bishop Kelly 30
The BK Comet’s missed a 42-yard field goal by Yourgi Smirnoff, a transfer from Ukraine!! The Ginnis Irish carried the confused kicker off the field on their shoulders!!
Jenks 41 Union 37 at Chapman Stadium
Numerous Jenks linemen were accused of steroid usage by a local south Tulsa tabloid over the Coronavirus summer!! An immediate retraction was made by the tabloid when the height and girth of the Jenks dads were discovered!! Seriously Jenks and Union are stud programs!!
Berryhill 31 Cascia Hall 22
Over the last 10 years, the Commandos winning percentage on the road is .683 while at home in the same 10 years the percentage was .939!! The Cascia home field can be intimidating with mansions east, west, and south and Utica Square just 2 blocks north!! Hangouts such as Queenies and Starbucks are looming for visiting opponents!!
Numerous events for the school's moms were scheduled for Thursday but the final champion came down to the wife-carrying contest!! Most of the Cascia dads are slight of build doctors, lawyers, and bankers but the Cascia moms are petite and have experience with the North American Women Carrying tournaments!! Berryhill won the game but the Cacsia moms won the five-inch B in T Mom-O-Meter trophy!!
FOS Diner of the week!
Freeway Cafe West -5849 S 49th West Ave. This Diner was once was visited by an actor who played in Freddie Kruger Horror movies!! John Depp played the first youth whose innards were thrashed by Freddy!!! Mr. Depp ordered a steak, extra rare and a Fresca! Freeway Cafe plays host to the Berryhill coaches show on Tuesdays and offers free peach cobbler to Chief fans who are in the audience!! Google it!
Hale 32 at Will Rogers College 31
The Hale Rangers which B in T named his dog from the pound after, have a new coach and a new attitude! (see picture) My Hale Rangers used the triple option to confuse the College of Rogers!! BTW my dogs name is Ranger, not Hale or Hell!!
Wagoner 36 Tahlequah 30
Two really tough football teams meet where the Bulldog paws on the road lead to W. L. Doom field!! Wagoner’s Isaac Smith is up to 6’6” and 240 pounds and is headed to Tulsa wreaked havoc on the Tiger offense with 10 tackles and a fumble recovery!
Tonkawa 30 Perry 18
Our cousin Kelly’s husband Charlie is a 50-year fan the Tonkawa Buccaneers!! He is President of the Buccaneer Booster Club, is the announcer for all football and basketball games, city counselor, firefighter and puts up with cousin Kelly!!
TONKAWA BUCS
FOS Pro Picks:
#########UPSET SPECIAL#########
Texans 34 at Cheifs 31
I was told by my publisher not to make fun of Chiefs QB Mahomes’ high pitched Mickey Mouse voice this year! Ok, I promise not to compare his voice to Mickey!! But he did not say, Minnie, Donald Duck, or Tiny Tim singing ’Tip Toe Through the Tulips’!! Texans defensive secondary picked off 3 passes and held WR Tyreeek Hill under 100 yards total offense! Muscle up Tyreeek at the line of scrimmage and the KC offense becomes average!!
Ravens 35 Browns 27
The comeback year for Cleveland QB Baker Mayfield was a decent 26-36, 289 yards, 3 TDs, and 1 interception. Overrated drama queen WR Odell Beckam Jr. was busy camera mugging and caught 3 passes for 52 yards and 1 touchdown! Mayfield took Odell to have a fatty and visit a strip joint after the game!! Afterward, the teammates worked out their mojo!!
Cowboys 38 at Rams 28
Ok, homer pick but if they lose I will reconsider my homerness!! After the game, Fox cameras spotted Jerry Jones chasing Dak Prescott with a 250-page contract with an ink bottle and a Quill pen!! His own bodyguards caught him and gave him an injection of an unknown substance!!
Lions 28 Bears 23
Da Bears have QBs Nick Noles, Mitch Trubinsky and Chase Daniels! All three can run the uncomplicated Bear offense! Again this year the Bears suck on offense! In 2019 the Bears ranked 29th out of 31 NFL teams!! Last year the Bears were at 279 yards per game give or take a foot and some inches!! So Trubinsky QBing sucked in 2019! Ex Missouri QB Chase Williams is a journeyman back-up that sucks thus leaving Nick Foles to beat 29th in total offense!! The only thing to do is to get Peyton Manning out of doing commercials!!
SATURDAY, SEP 12
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, SEP 19
CANCELED
SATURDAY, SEP 26 W
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, OCT 3 L
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, OCT 17
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
FRIDAY, OCT 23 W
Time TBA ET | ESPN network
FRIDAY, OCT 30
Time TBA ET | ESPN network
SATURDAY, NOV 7
atNavy L
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, NOV 14
SMU W
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, NOV 21
Tulane W
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, NOV 28
Time TBA ET | TV TBA
SATURDAY, DEC 5
American Championship
Time TBA ET | TV TB
FOS Tulsa Projected Record: 6-4
B in T’s words of wisdom from the unwise one: Scotch and pickle juice does not help a hangover as I was instructed by my late great uncle Jeff!
Have A great sports week!
B in T/FOS
B, in T
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