Sunday, June 2, 2019

TU Homies in Somewhere, Indiana/B in T Next OU President Prediction



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Soonerpolitics.org

Notes ‘Bout Nuthin’:

Bryan in Tulsa On Vacation in Indiana to Fish and Drink!!!

I am going vacationing for a few days to fish with my college buddies from Tulsa University!!  Yes, there will be farting of erroneous gasses, belching through the nose, drinking till we puke and smoking till it comes out the ears like smoke signals!!  We will get up every morning in a fog and get into a small paddle boat and fish in my Frat Bros private Lake in Somewhere, Indiana!!. Thus this episode can be officially included in the Faked Out Sports Fishing category!!  

The following may or may not happen in a lake in Somewhere, Indiana:

  1. Eating a bunch of fried fish caught and cooked by the TU men on the final day in Somewhere, Indiana!. MAY HAPPEN!!
  2. Catching a 14 lb catfish while intoxicated!!  MAY NOT HAPPEN (only 3 lbs and it was at the local market!)
  3. Numerous fibs regarding how we almost made the TU football team but did not and became dominant Intermural Football League players!!  VERY MUCH MAY HAPPEN!!
  4. Smoking Fatties MAY NOT HAPPEN!  (That we will remember)
  5. A giant ALLIGATOR Garfish that is named ’Nessy’ will be spotted by 4 dudes in a small boat!!  While celebrating the discovery the boat is capsized and the 4 slightly inebriated TU alums fall into the lake as Nessy scurries away!!  THIS MAY HAVE HAPPENED!!
  6. Somewhere in Somewhere, Indiana, an 8-foot bear entered the cabin looking for food scraps!!  Upon entering the cabin the giant 800-pound bear smells an awful aroma that made his eyes water and forced the big visitor to head for the hills!!  It was likely a lingering stench from a medical marijuana substance or gastric urges lingering throughout the cabin!!  THIS MAY HAVE HAPPENED!!
  7. A giant aircraft hovered over the small lake!!  None of us recognized the hovercraft-like vehicle but no aliens were spotted!!  Disappointed, we all took off our aluminum hats and had another drink of Wellers!!  THIS MAY NOT HAPPEN!
  8. Drinking mass quantities of Indiana moonshine!!  THIS WILL HAPPEN!!

What happens in Somewhere, Indiana stays in Somewhere, Indiana!!!

Bedlam Softball in Super Regional in OKC!!  late deadline pick

OU 2 OSU 0

OU has lost 1 of its last 164 games!  Blonde pitcher Samantha Show for State hit two home runs and pitched a complete game to beat the Gators!!  She also drove the Cowboy bus from Stillwater!!  Also cooked the team’s pre-game chili with beans meal!!!  I would be remiss if I did not mention that she braided the entire team's hair!!  Sam could not beat the Sooner!!!

Ex-Baylor Head Coach Hired as Offensive Analyst for Alabama Football Coach Grumpy!!

After ex-Coach Art Briles of Baylor was hired and fired at a high school football team in Plano Texas, he was hired as Offensive Analyst at Alabama!!  Briles was fired by Plano one week after he was hired due to a disagreement in the definition of student-athlete!!  Briles was more concerned about increasing the high school practice time to 6 hours daily and decreasing the classroom time to 3 hours per day, year round!!  True poop!!  Once Coach Grumpy Saban heard of this injustices he hired Briles and made him a Offensive Analyst with a salary of 60k a year!!  Coach Briles immediately called for a kegger with the Tri Delta Sorority!!

Top 10 Candidates to be Next OU President!!

  1. Toby Keith (OU football sideline analyst with Chris Plank)
  2. Bob Stoops (XFL coach who at one time coached the Football Sooners)
  3. Drake (back masseuse for Toronto Raptors)
  4. Bernie Sanders (political old fart)
  5. Donald Trump (older politic old fart)
  6. Thirty of the thirty-one Democratic Presidential candidates that did not run against Donald Trump in the 2020 Presidential election!
  7. Patti Gasso (OU softball head coach and leading candidate for OU Presidency.......and 2020 U.S. Presidential Candidacy!)
  8. Any Oil Company CEO in Oklahoma that likes Sooner Nation or Sooner Politics!!
  9. Barry Switzer (the man knows anyone that has worn Crimson)
  10. Ted Nugent (NRA kingpin-campus would be VERY safe)






Soonerpolics.org

FOS MLB

Brewers could replace the Basketball Bucks as the 2019 fan favorite team!!
But not the Packers!!

The Hockey Blues are definitely the new preppy St. Louis fans favorite!!
Cardinal baseball.........who?

The Astros have no sports replacement in Houston!!  They are the Gods of that town!!  Texas A&M football might be the closest, but they must beat Alabama at Kyle Field!!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one:  A wise woman once said (Not B in T’s wife........... nope never, not her) that even though the oven is broke the pilot light is still glowing and hot!!

Have a great sports week!!

B in T/Faked Out Sports

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Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL)
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B, in T

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