Sunday, March 22, 2020

Tulsa Target Store Toilet Paper Thief is Caught!!



FOS/B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

soonerpolitics.org

FOS Notes ’bout Nuthin:

”Humor in stressful times can be difficult but a necessity” - Red Skelton

Trump Toilet Paper Thieves at Tulsa Super Target!!
A good friend of ours works at Target and was asked by a rather large woman if there was toilet paper in the stock room since the shelves were empty!?  Our friend the Target Rep explained that they are usually gone before they hit the shelf and the Target toilet paper truck will be here in two days but will be gone in two minutes!!  The lady simply went into the ladies restroom at Target and jacked 5 rolls of Trump toilet paper and used her electric handicap cart to knock over a few displays and a security guard on her way out of the store!!  She was arrested by the Tulsa Police on 81st and Memorial with the toilet paper and the electric cart!!  Shat happens!!

Coronavirus is Badass! 

No Sports?  Take this time to get to know your partner!!
Hashtag/flowersdinnerspecialbrownies

FOS is projecting a ton of newborns around the Holiday Season this year!!  Hashtag/nosportsmakewoopie

No toilet paper?!!  Ration you TP starting today!
Hashtag/S.S.D.D.  (same shat different day)

Tulsa Mayor states no crowd gatherings of more than 10!
Hashtag/boccetourneycancelledworldwide

Wash your hands for 15 minutes at least!
Hashtag/feettoo 
All restaurants and bars are closing!!
Hashtag/stripjointsaliveandkicking


FOS Rumors:

*Rumor has it that New England QB Tom Brady is heading to Dallas to join forces with Bob Stoops and the Dallas Renegades of the XFL!!  Dana White, XFL and UFC mogul, has Tommy boy on speed dial!!  Looks like Tampa Bay is now in the XFL!!!

*Rumor has it that TU Basketball Coach Haith will be next coach at Lehigh University and Tulsa is putting together a package for Bill Self that includes a Southern Hills membership and a Yacht at Keystone Lake!!  No shat!!  I promise!!

*Rumor has it for all of my FOS Chicago Bears readers, the Halas family trust representatives had breakfast with supposedly retired Eli Manning!!  Mr. Manning could back up Mitch Trubinsky and mentor this square-jawed Robo QB!!

*Rumor has it that Texas Tech coach Chris Beard hires two more assistant coaches and becomes the first division 1 basketball team with 20 assistant coaches in Harold's suits on the bench!!  True stuff Maynard!

*Rumor has it that the Center sponsored Boccia Travel Team will not be traveling on any cruise ships or airline flights due to the Coronavirus threat this summer!!  We have canceled the South Korean and Iraq trip!!  No shat!

*Rumor has it that the 26th Annual Rocklahoma Festival has changed it’s name to Canibaslahoma Festival!!  The creators of the Pryor Fest are very high on the name change!!  Really high!!

FOS Bubblehead Stuff:

Tulsa Schools are closed so the kids are taking over the CITY!!  Help!!  

There are numerous board games and card games to play!!  Crayons, finger paint, and pastel-colored chalk have kept the grandkids of Mr. and Mrs. B in T occupied for hours!!  Make a game out of picking up the backyard doggy dooky!  Footballs, Basketballs, Frisbees and yard darts can be fun!!  Lemonade stand!  My granddaughters like to put bows in what little hair I have, make-up and eye shadow and paint Papa B in T toenails TU blue and gold!!  

FOS NCAA Tournament Picks!

FOS NIT Picks!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one!!
If someone says something you disagree with, just eat a brownie and things will get better!!

Have a great sports less week!!

FOS/B in T





B, in T
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