Bryan in Tulsa
FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM
Bobblehead Sports:
Over the last few years, my grandson Gus and I have dared TU football to win a miracle game!! After a long discussion with Gus, we have agreed to run in our underwear (we both have matching Avenger undies, boys medium, and size 52 5XL) Saturday night if TU beats the mighty Buckeyes!! The location is TBD, to be determined!! Go, Cane!
B in T Notes:
Fantasy Football Draft Notes:
I slept through my once every 3 years Fantasy Draft with my son Lance and my inlaws! Ouch, Wednesday I had a day from hell at the Center and then a two-hour nap put me late to the fantasy football frolic!! Then a miracle happened and my team was on auto-draft and my QB is Dak Prescott!!! I'm in first place and I did not fricking know I had a team!! I love football 🏈 and the autumn 🍂 season!!
Sports interest at the Center is average with around 25 views a month
I occasionally like to look at the number of views to our Center Facebook each month to see what the trends and interests may be. Here are last months Top 3:
- Commander and Cheif - Wendi updates on Coronavirus- 51 views
- Sherri (controversy queen) issues with the new giant rock garden around the building!! - 43 views
- Bryan’s pedicure with giant toe painted TU blue and gold!! - 42 views
I am very bored today!
Do I need a brownie? Hehe he!!
New Nickname:
I like Redhawks as the new Union high school logo!! This stands out more than Union Pipeliners 798 or the Union Train Stations!
B in T to cover more high school girls wrestling!!
The fastest-growing sport in Tulsa high schools is women's wrestling!!!
B in T NCAA Football Top 4:
- Alabama
- Alabama
- Alabama
- Georgia
More Bobblehead Sports:
Pass it On!!
My brother Tre is very good about not cussing! The phrase he would use to replace a bad word was ‘punch a bunny’!! While hanging with my grandson Gus I became angered and used the ‘70s slang ‘that makes me want to punch a bunny’ while watching the OU - Tulane game!! Gus heard this term and loved it!! The phrase was uttered a few times in front of mother Maddie that afternoon and was immediately nixed!! I had no idea that my daughter was a bunny advocate!! Geeeeeeeeesh!!
Pumpkin Man Sighting!
Pumpkin Man was seen at a Canibus Store next to my Center home on 7th and Utica!! He purchased a U-Haul full of edible candy and brownies for good high schoolers at Halloween!! 🎃 🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭Can't wait for Halloween!!!
College Picks:
Illinois 30 Maryland 24
Maryland is a stepping stone for Illinois to be bowl-bound for the first time since George Washington chopped down the stupid cherry tree!! Why do you need an ax to chop down a 4-foot tall cherry tree?! The Illini had 265 yards rushing and needs to continue to lean on the rushing game! If a Bret Belima coached D gives up 37 points to a directional school again he will perform spontaneous human combustion on the practice field!! True shat!
Oklahoma 56 Nebraska 3
Oklahoma defense finally gets its balls 🏈 back in hand!! Rumor has it the Nebraska coach Frosty’s computer outbox has 322 resumes sent!! Also when Dallas coach McCarthy is fired midseason, Coach Riley’s resume update computer folder will be full!!
Texas A&M 69 New Mexico 17
A very, very unknown fact regarding the Lobos of New Mexico is that they were named after Lobos Tequilla 1707!! Google it!! I swear!! The new gig for the Aggie fans is after each point, not touchdown they must kiss their spouse, date or person sitting to their left!!
Cincinnati 36 at Indiana 28
Reportedly Cincinnati has refused the Big 12 offer and has applied to the NFC East!!
Alabama 38 at Florida 21
Bama QB Bryce Young has a NIL deal that will pay for his grandkid's college tuition!! True shat!! He also just shot a commercial with Coach Grumpy Saban's new Chevrolet dealership!! Three hours after the commercial aired, the NCAA investigators and the FBI were at Nick’s office doorstep!!
Ohio State 31 Tulsa 17
If you bring those Buckeye dudes to Tulsa and play in front of 11k fans at Chapman we will show those 4 and 5-star OSU players the meaning of fear!! Really folks, let's just take the 1.3 million for playing in Columbus and relax and watch the game on TV with a Margarita!! Quit talking about a return game at Chapman!! Several Tulsa fans visited BrewDog USA the top bar food in Columbus!! Correct Mr. York? Brewdog is known for its Shroom Burgers which can make you feel like you are on clouds high up in the air!! And we do mean high!! TU defense keeps them in the game but O was a no show!
**********Upset Special***********
Kansas 27 Baylor 24
The Jayhawks pulled off the greatest upset since Kansas and QB Nolan Cromwell led KU to a 23-3 victory over Oklahoma!! After this historic win, a Kansas Dean of colleges whose names are foreign to me, recommended closing school Monday AND making Monday a statewide holiday!! Thanks, Dr. Wehmeyer!! Who happens to be a friend of Faked Out Sports!!
Arkansas 52 Georgia Southern 13
The Razorback fans are in rare form as they call the hogs so rhythmically that actual hogs start coming to Don W. Reynolds Stadium! Google it!
Oklahoma State 31 at Boise State 30
Boise State players hugged the Cowboy players as they entered the stadium to show solidarity for their entry into the Big 12 Conference!! Bronco fans wept!! Oklahoma State running back La’Darren Brown ran over two tacklers and a Cowboy cheerleader to score the winning touchdown as time expired!!
Penn State 42 Auburn 22
The Nittanies will defeat the Tigers whose new coach Bryan Harsin thinks the vaccines for Covid are made out of Alien piss is not liked by many and liked by Less than Zero!!
High School Picks:
Bixby 38 Stillwater 31
Stillwater super star nose guard Daeson Simpkins, you guessed it, is related to Mrs. B in T's relatives in Blackwell!! The 5’11” 280-pound nose guard once ate an entire roadkill Armadillo at a dare from another Stillwater lineman!! Bixby has kids being recruited by several Power 5 conferences and some NFL teams!! No shat, Google it! Go Stillwater!
Cushing 34 at Berryhill 13
Downtown Berryhill was very hoppin as the big Cushing game and the Quilt Festival was the same weekend!!
Cushing LB and B in T nephew Caleb wanted to get his team fired 🔥 up at the Thursday dinner so he had two super burritos from Mi Casa Mexican Grill!! He followed with a fried ghost pepper flown in from Guadalupe!! He made 11 tackles against Berryhill!! I shat you not!!
Holland Hall 38 at Metro Christian 28
This is known as the battle of southside hot moms!! The Holland Hall moms are ranked 23rd in the USA Today national hot moms poll!!
Owasso 41 Broken Arrow 28
The Ram Booster Club organized a pancake flip-off breakfast and invited Tiger fans on gameday morning!! Lots of laughs as Owasso Coach Blankenship had three hot pancakes land on his head!! A hot batter pancake fight broke out between the Assistant Coaches at Owasso!! At this point Coach B put three assistants in timeout! The talent on the Ram defense is so talented that they can almost coach themselves!! In fact, defensive coaches during pregame warmups let the players coach while they smoke stogies! Just kidding!
BTW 62 Edison 14
Booker T all-everything back Micah Tease had his projected NIL money reportedly at 100k if he attends Alabama and 125k if he attends Oklahoma with a 25k National Imaging Likeness (NIL) bonus if sponsor Charlies Chicken sells 50k of their new spicy chicken gizzards!
Tonkawa 34 at Blackwell 27
********** BREAKING NEWS**********
ANOTHER PUMPKIN MAN SIGHTING AT BLACKWELL VS TONKAWA!UNBELIEVABLE!!
Numerous folks at the Blackwell Stadium swore they saw a helicopter but instead, it was a flying Pumpkin man throwing out edibles to the Blackwell student section!! Tight game but Tonkawa ruins Blackwell’s homecoming!!
Wagoner 38 Sperry 6
Wagoner takes out Sperry with a solid running game!! The Bulldog defense has been resurrected since the loss in the opener!!
Mom-O-Meter Sperry .979 Wagoner .970
These moms are so competitive that during the three-legged potato sack race Sperry moms requested a retake of the Wagoner mom's drug tests!! Truth!!
B in T Diner of the week-
Smoke Sisters BBQ on Main -
Best BBQ this side of Kansas City and you guessed it, on Main street Wagoner!!
The restaurant is known for its smoked bologna which uses wood flown in from the Red Wood Forest!! Folks in Wagoner say that former President George W. Bush’s security team once ordered 20lbs of bologna!! The entire security staff and George W. were full of bologna!! Hahaha!!
Pro Picks:
Browns 31 Texans 21
Texas backup QB Josh McCown has played for 12 different teams in over 19 years in the NFL!! McCown was pressed into service when Tyrod Taylor pulled a hamstring getting Gatorade! A month ago McCown was selling Progressive Insurance in Queens, and received a call from his agent that the Texans need a quarterback! Baker’s team was way too good today and the king of gab completed 21 of 31 for 345 yards and 2 touchdowns!!
Cowboys 34 at Chargers 27
Dak was on schedule to throw 60 passes against the Chargers until teammate Ezekiel Elliott started fighting Dak for the pigskin at the snap!! True deal!! I promise!! Before the incident, Eze had 2 caries for -1 yards, after - 9 carries for 89 yards!!
Ravens 28 Chiefs 24
The Ravens are at home and if the Chiefies were at home the score would be the opposite!! Make note this pick strategy is the why B in T is 99.8 percent accurate!!
Bears 34 Bengals 21
The rumor mill is swirling that da Bears are attempting to sign Mitch Trubinsky back and bring Mike Dikta in again as head coach!! Dikta is 89 and feels like a spring chicken when he is regular!! Mr. Bob Curran, Lambda Chi EY 31 from TU, was instrumental in getting Mr. Dikta hired by simply marrying his daughter Syfullis Jane in 1991!! Bears defeat the Bengals in a foot of snow!!
Have a great sports week!!
Bryan in Tulsa
|
|
|
B, in T |
No comments:
Post a Comment