Faked Out Sports: June 2019

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Oklahoma State Season W/L Projections/ Rocklahoma With the Grandkids!

Football only 62 days away!

’Till TU Shocks the world in East, Lansing!!

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FOS/B in T

Sports Notes ’bout Nuthin!

Pistols Firing at OK Corral Shootout Looking For Doc Holiday to Find a Quarterback in Stillwater!!

Spencer Sanders seems to be driving the 1st team offensive Cadillac after the so-call meet and greet spring touch football practice. My amateur insight into OSU football tells me that Grad transfer from Hawaii, Dru Brown is the real deal!! His heady leadership will eventually catch coach Mullet Gundy’s eye!! With a Grad Transfer leader or a young Spencer Sanders at Quarterback, here is a FOS projection of the Oklahoma State 2019 season!

at Oregon State-- W by 4

McNeese State-- W by 29

at Tulsa-- W by 8 (as a TU alumnus this was tuff!)

at Texas-- L by 5

Kansas State-- W by 13

at Texas Tech-- W by 2

Baylor-- W by 11

at Iowa State-- L by 11

Texas Christian-- W by 3

Kansas-- W by 20

at West Virginia-- L by 8

Oklahoma-- L by 5

OSU -- 8 WINS 4 LOSSES

Academy Sports and Outdoor Texas Bowl:

Oklahoma State 37 Texas A&M 31

Shinedown REALLY Shined Down on the Rocklahoma Crowd in Pryor, Oklahoma!!

A few weeks ago among the tornados and flooding, B in T took his grandkids to their first Mosh Pit at Rocklahoma in Pryor, Oklahoma! Papa was hoping for Godsmack, Shinedown and other heavy metal, bands to wear out all of us by 9:30 PM!! As we left Rocklahoma in our Chevy Equinox with 2 car seats, the Shinedown toddlers were fast asleep before we left the mud caked parking lot!! Mimi was not happy about the mud covered Equinox!! We survived another Rocklahoma!!

New OU QB Reminds Some Sooner Brainiacs/Nostalgiacs of Thomas Lott!!

OU’s Justin Hurt is bigger and faster than Lott but his running style, as Lott’s, is to run through the defender......not around!! Hurt has better arm strength and both QBs like to wind up when they throw!

WHOOPSIE, B in T Projected Rod Thompson to be Tulsa’s Next Assistant Coach, But No!!

For reasons unknown, Rod will not be an assistant on TU!!

Evidently, an alum from TU (not me I swear) offered to take Rod and his 5-star son, Bryce, to Coney Island on 11th street!! This was a huge NO, NO according to NCAA investigators!! You never know where the NCAA mafia will be hiding!! He could be in the chili of Coney Islander near the TU campus!!

Local Softball Cheer Grades!!

Since covering more softball this year I have noticed that there is a game within a game for the girls! Softball benches seem to battle each other in cheer routines and it is an art to know just where the ESPN cameras are located!

B in T Softball Bench Cheer ratings!!

Oklahoma State- they can find the cameras better than any Big 12 team so their presentations are usually choreographed the best!! A certain young lady has a special knack of knowing the exact locations of ESPN camerapersons because she can do all the popular dances while her coach is being interviewed between innings!!

9.87 Score

Oklahoma- the young ladies are very talented and their bench routines are very fly and creative!! They are just a tad bit more regimented with their hand gestures which cost them some artistic points! Plus they are not allowed to flip the bird to their opponent!!

9.85 Score

Tulsa - B in T is very much a homer with these young student-athletes, and has been promised an autographed poster for the man cave!! Shhhhh! Their cute routine of the Old Town Road song has gone viral and some of the Seniors will be appearing on the Voice next year!!

9.97 Score (missed perfect 10 due to one of the short Senior infielder's lack of tone)

Arkansas - Razorback girls were disqualified for hiring Hollywood Choreographers!!

DQ Score

This happened, I swear.........trust me.......😃

FOS/MLB

Cardinals - trying to find and establish their identity, pitching, and batting! Hope they will let us know when they have found it!!

Astro’s - minor leagues would give the NL Central a run for their money!

Royals - Brian Flynn from Owasso (friend of B in T and FOS-not sure he knows it) is the lone bright spot for the KC pitching staff!!

Cubs - if the Cubby Bears could play all their games at home their 2019 record would be 140 Ws- 22 Ls!!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one: I still believe in long walks on the beach, the Easter Bunny and pure cocaine!!

Have a great sports week!!

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Soonerpolitics.org

Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills

Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank

Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III

Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx

Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson

Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc.

Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL)

Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK)

MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO)

Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas

T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK

Dr. Richard Stephens DDS

Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

B, in T

Monday, June 17, 2019

Cow Tipping and Concuss Protocols/Area Sideline Reporters

Faked Out Sports B in T

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NOTES ’BOUT NUTHIN!!

OUT OF THE 134 READERS OF B IN T, I HAVE RECEIVED NO REQUESTS FOR FREE SPONSORSHIP. SO I EITHER HAVE NUMEROUS FANS WITHOUT JOBS OR YOU ARE READING THE TULSA WORLD COMIC SECTION FOR HUMOR!! HEHEHE!

👀NEW SECTION COMING TO FAKED OUT SPORTS IN AUGUST!!👀

👀👀FOS BOBBLEHEAD SPORTS👀👀

This will be funny stuff regarding kids sports from an old farts perspective!(B in T) Stay tuned!!!!

This was grandson Gustavo’s last soccer game for the season! He scored 2 goals and received the first participation trophy of his career!! We will discuss participation trophies another day!! The treats that day, were CUPCAKES and fruit drinks with SUGAR!! I really wanted to hug this cute mom but I was told to behave by my daughter or no more games for Papa!! No sugarless, tofu smelling, cardboard tasting snacks at this soccer game!!! I thanked God that I survived a stroke and would be around for more bobblehead stuff to write about!! Enough of the serious stuff, Dilly Dilly!!

Cow Tipping in Oklahoma and Texas is as Popular as Surfing at the California Beaches (In Thong Bikinis!)

Cow tipping in certain counties of Oklahoma has become legalized!! All counties in Texas have legalized cow tipping since prohibition in the 1920’s!! Cow tipping officially became a sport in ’70s when rival ranchers began tipping each other's cows over the night before the big FFA Kay County Fair!! This story has been documented by my wife who was the 1977 Kay County Fair FFA Queen!! This IS a very true story! Back in the ’70s cow tipping was very unsafe and numerous cow concussions were reported by cow veterinarians! Currently, cow tipping is very safe and protected by cow helmets which are worn at night!! Cow hip displacement is currently being addressed by cow veterinarians and could be an injury issue with the increased cow tipping sports popularity!! Veterinarian journals on cow tipping and medical concerns, can be found in the following:

The National Cow Weekly Journal
Future Farmers of America Journal ”We Take Cow Tipping Serious”
The Cow Institute Journal ”What Is So Wrong About a World Without Cow Tipping?”

We at Faked Out Sports Do not Condone or Support Cow Tipping.

The Over/Under For Wins in Razorback Football This Year Is 5.5!!! B IN T WILL TAKE THE OVER!! WHY?? READ!!

Coach Morris is putting together a defense to match his offense in 2019!! Do not underestimate Morris ability to recruit speed in Arkansas and the surrounding states!! Defensive Coordinator, John Chavous who was DC at Tennessee, LSU and Texas A&M from 2002 to 2017!! A very impressive resume even for the high and mighty at Hog world!! At Arkansas, his total defense ended ranking 78th and his turnover categories were improved from 2017!! His ability to recruit at each of his stops has made him an elite DC and has warranted a 1.5 million dollar 2019 contract!! This is the largest ever for a Coordinator at the University of Arkansas!! So Chavous is a better recruit and coach as well and FOS will be watching and so will the Hog big donors!!! Whoooo Pig Sooooey Razorbacks!!

Area Football Sideline Reporters Come in Different Shapes and Sizes!!

Oklahoma University- Chris Plank 5’9” 175 lbs (he will play scatback on our all sideline team!) Plank is an 8 year veteran of the OU sideline and is one of the top sideline dwellers of all college football! His part-time gig on FOX radio and as an announcer for the Superpower OU Softball team has given him nationwide accreditation!! Teddy Lehman 6’3” 225lbs (he will play linebacker and running back or where ever he wants, on the all sideline reporter team!) Lehman was a former OU All-American linebacker and NFL 5 year veteran!! Lehman's in-depth knowledge of the college football game has made his transition to the intense Sooner sideline amazing!!

Rating A

Oklahoma State- Robert Allen- 6’0” 300+ ( he will play OL, DL and snapper on the sideline reporter team!) Allen is a twenty year veteran of roaming the Cowboy sidelines!! If you were to look up the definition of ‘Homer’ in the Webster Dictionary you would find a picture of Robert Allen in OSU colors down to his Pistol Pete underwear! Allen graduated from OSU, met his wife at OSU, his son played at OSU and his daughter is running for Homecoming queen, at you guessed it, OSU!! His knowledge of he Poke sports range from an injury report on the volleyball team’s back up spikers Achilles tendon to the availability of the scout team’s second string deep snapper for fall practice!! He is the God of Oklahoma State sports stuff!!

Rating A-

Tulsa University- Jeremy Poplin 6’4” 191 lbs (recently lost 90 lbs, so he has been moved from lineman to wide receiver!) Jeremy is about to break Chris Planks record for staying with sports radio in Tulsa for 20 years!! His hard work and dedication to the local sports media in the Tulsa area is remarkable! I have listened to Pop all of those years!! He has been a one-man show on radio and his show on the Tulsa football sidelines is terrific!! When he took over the Tulsa sidelines for Plank I personally thought that this was Pop’s niche!! Pop has always been smooth and approachable to the TU football coaches and student-athletes when interviewing!!

Rating A

Arkansas University- Geno Bell 6’4” 275 lbs (defensive lineman for the the Razorbacks in the mid-90s thus he is automatically a lineman for the sideline reporter team!) Geno replaced Quinn Grovey as sideline reporter in 2017, when Grovey moved to the Razorback color analyst position in the air-conditioned booth!

Rating B+

Words of wisdom from the unwise one: Never go to your grandson's morning soccer game after having a bran muffin and a fiber bar for breakfast!!

Have a great sports week!!

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

Soonerpolitics.org

Sponsors:

Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills

Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank

Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III

Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx

Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson

Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc.

Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL)

Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK)

MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO)

Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas

T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK

Dr. Richard Stephens DDS

Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

B, in T

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

Twentieth Anniversary Noodling Tournament in Kingfisher June 14th/ Coach Grinch’s Players Must Buy In

Faked Out Sports/B in T

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FOS/B in T

Notes ’bout nuttin!!!

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The 20th Anniversary of the Oklahoma Noodling Club Tournament will be held in Kingfisher, Ok on June 14th and 15th!!

Numerous noodling superstars will be there and FOS will send a correspondent there for interviews and catfish grabbing action!! Noodling stars such as Colleen ’Grabber” Johnson, Dobber ”Jaw Hooker” Davis and the Noodling King of Kingfisher Corona ”Big Mouth” Blunthead!! The Fox Sports Noodling Channel will cover the final round Saturday with the commentators from the Fox Ice Fishing Channel out of Fargo, North Dakota!!

Oklahoma Defensive Players MUST Buy Into Coach Grinch!!

The 2019 OU defensive version has athleticism, size (although new DC Grinch has required his version of D to look sleeker) and speed but lacks in other categories!! Veterans and newcomers must agree internally with their heart and soul that Coach Grinch is their Messiah to lead them to the top 25 of defenses in the nation!! Veterans and newcomers alike must agree externally in Coach Grinch by running the extra mile of conditioning this summer, by setting a new personal record in weightlifting for each assignment and finally know every inch of every assigned playbook frontwards and backward before the start of fall camp in Norman on August 1, 2019!! They must get rid of all Grinch Christmas jokes before fall practices start!!

FOS High School Football

Gentry Williams 2019 Sophomore QB at Booker T Washington, Tulsa, has been offered a scholarship by Oklahoma!! Other scholarship offers from Memphis, Iowa State and Baylor! He may be the fastest athlete in the state of Oklahoma!! BTW will be loaded in 2019 with Linebacker J.J. Hester who has recently received offers from Ole Miss and Georgia Tech!! Broken Arrow’s Safety Myles Slusher has already signed with Oregon!! Myles and his super mom, Blanca, are friends of FOS and Bryan in Tulsa!! BTW is the preseason Faked Out Sports and Lindy’s Magazine pick Broken Arrow to win the Conference USA championship!! True story!!

Sooner Nation 2019 B in T Predictions:

Sooners will lead the nation in Total Offense!!
Baker Mayfield will be on the Sooner sideline for the OU/Texas game!! He and Country Western star Toby Keith will do a double moon to the Texas bench and their overrated coach!!
Bevo will attack one of the Sooner Schooner ponies and will be put into an induced Bull coma at a local Dallas Animal Hospital where he survives the attack by the mean ole Sooner Schooner pony!!
Sooner Coach Riley will beat three rival coaches with mullets in 2019!!
OU will have two more new Presidents before the end of the football season!! I promise!!
New Defensive Coordinator Grinch will not steal Christmas but will instead steal the ball away from the opponent’s offenses at a rate of +2.8 per game!!!! Rated 11th in the nation!!
The Sooners will recruit and sign 6 players from the state of Oklahoma for the first time since 2004!!
A Sooner coach will wear Crimson colored skinny jeans and was told never to wear those jeans outside of his home by Oklahoma Sooner AD Joe Castiglione!!
An Oklahoma player will be a finalist for the Heisman Trophy award but will not win!!
The Texas Longhorns and Coach Herman and his 15 million dollar home, with a mote in Austin, will NOT, NO WAY make the final four playoffs in 2019-20!! So all of Shorthorn lovers put your crack pipes down and smell the Crimson roses!!