Faked Out Sports

Sunday, February 2, 2020

Thunder and Grammy Notes

FOS/-B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

soonerpolitics.org

FOS Notes ’bout Nuthin’

FOS Thunder Rumble!

The three-headed point guard of Chris Paul, Dennis Schroeder, and Shae Gilgeous - Alexander is ruling the NBA and has led the Thunder to be the surprise team of the league!! The Thunder defense is known for its length and speed! Nerlens Noel is a super big man and a dunking, alley-oop machine and backing up big Sasquatch Steven Adams!! Good team ball sharing for the Thunder!! So different from past Thunder teams!!

FOS Grammy notes ‘bout Nuthin:

Jonas Brothers need to use floss before singing performance!!

The first TV special I have seen without Opra trying to sell me a diet plan!!

Blake Shelton and friend Gwen Stefani sang a beautiful new hit by Blake!! Gwen looks like an older version of Barbie gone rogue!! Blake looks more like her father than her mate!!

Megan and Harry Tour America:

The Royal couple will spend a weekend at Branson this Spring!!

Megan and Harry will attend Dolly World as front row guests to a Michael Buble concert ’Tribute to Andy Williams White Christmas’!! They will be staying at the Hampton Inn Branson, with a free breakfast buffet!! The Royal family will have the Branson Ballknobbers as security detail for the concert!!

FOS Bobbleheads:

See Thunder Notes Above

FOS College Basketball Picks:

Tulsa 82 UConn 70

Tulsa, who was the AAC preseason 10th best team per the media brain dorks are currently in FIRST PLACE!! The same brainiacs evidently are picking Sarah Palin to be the 2020 Presidential winner!!!

UConn is leaving the American Athletic Conference to possibly join Conference USA or maybe dump football and join the Big East in basketball!! La de da! Good riddance! Tulsa guard, Darian Jackson has discovered a 3-point shot and scored 21 against the Huskies!! Good riddance Huskies, we will miss the trip to Connecticut..........not!

ORU 78 at North Dakota 76

ORU plays in the Dakotas so much that each player has Nike shoes that double as snowshoes!! See picture! No shat! ORU pulls out a super road win and guard Max Ambas sank a last-second 3 pointer to win in the -2 degree Daktas frozen tundra!!

Kansas 73 at TCU 68

Before the game coach Self and coach Dixon compared hair product tips! Kansas big man Azubuike had so many dunks the he had to put Neosporin rub on his wrists!!

Kentucky 82 at Tennessee 75

Kentucky Coach Calipari signed autographs after the game with some of the Wildcat faithful that made the trip to Knoxville!! Calipari signed balls, programs, t-shirts, dogs, babies, and women's blouses with them in ’em!! EJ Montgomery and Immanuel Quickly led Kentucky with 20 and 19 points respectively!!

Oklahoma 69 West Virginia 66

The Sooners and newly found NCAA comeback mascot of the year Top Daug entertained the crowd by shooting out popcorn to the upper deck crowd at Lloyd Noble arena!! Very messy but the kids loved it!! This was not approved by AD Castiglione!! Mr. Daug was given a 1-week suspension! Oklahoma power forward Brady Mannix had 16 points and 12 rebounds!!

Missouri 76 Arkansas 74

The famed Antler student section was in rare form against the Razorbacks!! The Antlers were created in 1976 and came from the Lilly Tomlin’s skit of Antler dancing on Saturday Night Live!! No shat!! Very true!! The Antlers have been kicked out of 11 games in the last 10 years!! This year they brought a hog carcass to the game a tried to cook piggy on the hot dog 🌭grill!! The Antler students were immediately removed from Hearn Arena and PETA was summoned to Columbia to investigate the hog carcass!!

Baylor 85 Oklahoma State 69

Baylor is no longer the best-kept secret in the Big 12 Conference or the nation!! The Cowboys have young talent and more young folks coming for 2020, including Cade Cunningham who is considered the best player in the country!! Hurry, young man!!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one!! Never wear a Dallas Cowboy cap to a Superbowl Party between the 49ers and the Chiefs! Just saying........not smart.........folks feel sorry for ya!!

Have a great sports week!

FOS/B in T

B, in T

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Sunday, January 26, 2020

College Football Coaching Shuffle!

FOS/B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

FOS Notes ’bout Nuthin!

College Coaching Caravan Shuffle is No Icky Shuffle but INTERESTING!!

The latest shuffles:

The wild dude shuffle- Coach Mike Leach left ho-hum Washington State to Mississippi State of the big stoic SEC!!

The preppy shuffle- Coach Lane Kiffin and his hot wife left Florida Atlantic to coach the Ole Miss Rebels of the nonpreppy SEC world!!

The Carolina connection shuffle- The new hot coach in college football, Matt Ruhle from Baylor, is headed to the NFL Carolina Panthers!! Fast lane for coach Ruhle!!

The Huskie re-shuffle- Defensive Coordinator Jimmy Lake replaces Washington’s Peterson who resigned!

The Seminole Shuffle- Florida State hired Mike Novell from Memphis of the AAC coach grooming conference!

The Razorback Shuffle-The Hogs hired Sam Pittman who was the highest-paid offensive line coach in college football from Georgia!! Top-notch recruiter!!

The Florida Atlantic Shuffle- FAU hired Willie Taggert and will be looking for another coach in two years!!

The Big Bad Baylor Bears Shuffle- David Aranda who was the LSU National Champion defensive coordinator, will put his signature on the Big 12 Conference!!

The Aloha Shuffle- Todd Graham, former TU coach, will go to Hawaii and bark out orders there!! The Tasmanian devil is BACK!

Special B in T Announcement:

Megan and Harry will be spending a weekend this summer at the B in T home!! The Royal family will be going to a Driller baseball game and having Mrs. B in T's famous hamburgers on the Hasty-Bake!! Their security detail (Coweta Sherriffs Department) will sleep in the kid's room with the X-box!!

Super Bowl Pick:

Chiefs 31 49ers 27

The Chiefs and the Mahomes to Kelce 2 touchdowns defeated the 49ers Garoppollo to Kittle 1 touchdown!! The half time show of Jennifer Lopez and Shakira was so hot the men over 60 years of age had to use protective eyewear!! JLo's hubby, Alex Rodriguez was a background dancer for the halftime gig!! Rodriguez went unnoticed by the pumped-up crowd; which is a good thing!! Upon receiving the Super Bowl MVP Trophy, Mahomes looked at the camera and said ’Let's go to Dolly World!’ in his Mickey Mouse voice!!

FOS College Basketball Picks!

Texas Tech 77 at Kansas 75 2OTs

Kansas goes down at home as numerous students in the Allen Field House were left crying from the exhaustion of a double-overtime game!! The KU professor section was able to take a short nap and go outside and smoke a cigar due to the length of the game!! The Tech nobodies were able to beat the Kansas 5 star some bodies!!

Auburn 84 Kentucky 81

Coach Calipari has requested highway patrolman to escort him to and from his seat at the Auburn arena!! This is a new trend to keep up with the popular SEC football coaching arrangements!! Highway patrolmen are now being discussed for the Kentucky Volleyball, Softball and Rowing coaches!! Google it!

Oklahoma 74 Oklahoma State 70

Top Dog, the OU mascot returns after 12 years and gets the into a skirmish with Pistol Pete before tipoff!! Both mascots were embarrassed about the amount of ESPN TV coverage they were not getting! OU’s Top Dog is handled by a professional dancer from New York named Tongavillarial who played in Cats, Hamilton and Peter Pan on Broadway! OU Top Dog mascot is always the Top Dog at the Norman Lloyd Noble Arena!! But when Pistol Petey arrived with his big head and the big pistol the mascot rumble was on!! Too Dog took a water pistol and started shooting at the giant paper mache head until it softened to a Burger King 🍔man face! Scary!!

Tulsa 71 Wichita State 59

Tulsa again is lethal at home and the Shockers were ranked 27th nationally until their trip to the Reynolds Center!! Mrs. B in T is a Shocker alum and must cook me breakfast for a week if my ’Cane win!! Pop-Tarts for the victor!!

Arkansas 67 at Alabama 62

The Razorback fans are already looking at NCAA tournament projections with the Hogs all the way up to a 5th seed by Jerry Palm!! This road win can catapult the team that wins to a solid upper-tier finish in the SEC!!

Oral Roberts 77 Denver 61

The Denver Pioneers, not the Nuggets, are at the bottom of the Summit League and should be a solid pick to lose to ORU!! ORU big man Nzekiwese pulled down 13 rebounds and Sophomore big man Obanor continues to improve his inside scoring!! Easy win!

Arkansas 80 Auburn 75

The Bud Walton Arena will be packed with the entire student section wearing plaid jackets in honor of Auburn coach Bruce Pearl!! Coach Pearl is the only Division 1 coach that can coach a game and 1 hour later sell a 2012 Ford Taurus with 200,000 miles on the speedometer!! True that!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one!! The term snizzle is a meteorologist’s made-up word for rain drizzle and snow!! For rizzle!

Have a great sports week!

Soonerpolitics.com

B, in T

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Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Get Back Coaches! and Big 12-SEC Picks

FOS/B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

FOS Notes ’bout Nuthin:

GET BACK COACHES??!! Are you joking?? COACHES hired to pull back other coaches from getting a penalty flag?!

I would think that the coaches at Clemson, Georgia and the Los Angeles Rams could simply wield a certain bit of restraint rather than create another coaching position!! There is always a chance that a Get Back Coach could accidentally pull down the coach's pants or disconnect a headphone cable and cause mass confusion!! The Get Back coach is mainly responsible for keeping the main coach or dude who thinks he is important enough to have a Get Back Coach by grabbing him throughout the game to make sure

he does not do one of the following:

Get flagged for being on the field of play!
Spit on the Referee!
Make sure he is hydrated!
Make sure he does not trip over electric cords hanging on his head!
Make sure the over-exaggerated coach does not try to get in the field to make a jarring tackle!!

Top Get Back Coaches in 2019:

Brent Venables- Defensive Coordinator Clemson- he once jumped on the field and ate a division III player!
Sean McVay- Head Coach Los Angeles Rams. This seems to be just for show since this little fellow is not very scary looking!

FOS Fun Facts:

-England's First Family has entered the famous transfer portal!! Hehehehe!

-Mike Leach is the new coach of Mississippi State! I love this man! He believes in UFOs, crop circles and can turn an interview into a comedy club!! Having Coach Leach will offset grumpy Saban in the SEC! Coach Leach and preppy Lane Kiffon coaching in the same state and SEC could be dangerous!

-Get Back Coaches are needed in youth sports for all parent coaches who exaggerate the significance of a bad call in a 3rd-grade football game!! Get Back Coaches should be get a life coaches!!

-The Texas Tech basketball team is having great success with Chris Beard as their coach. The team has almost 16 men suited up for each game, plus the trainers!! The Texas Tech suit allowance for assistant coaches is $1,000 a month between 16 coaches!! A poultry $62.50 dollars a month per coach!! Coach Beards girlfriend Randi Trew agreed to do the sewing for $150,000 a year!! Umm interesting..........

FOS Bobbleheads:

My OKC 18 month old granddaughter, Frankie, whom I am personally training basketball crossover, around the back, no look and Euro Step moves is on a 3-year-old AAU team!!

This team is sponsored by Kimberly/Clark (Pull-Ups Division) and Huggies Wipes!! I just made that up so don't send letters!

FOS College Basketball Picks:

BIG 12 - SEC CHALLENGE PICK:

Auburn 88 Iowa State 74

Auburn coach Bruce Pearl who is well known for his animated reactions to referee calls!! The Pearl was a more red-faced used car salesman than ever!! The Tigers kept the Clones one step behind throughout the game!! As long as Coach Pearl stays one step ahead of the NCAA probation police things will be just fine for Pearl and the Auburn Tigers!!

Texas 74 LSU 69

The Big 12 finally found a team that can beat the LSU Tigers in something!! Texas has jacked up some wins against teams like the High Point Dryers so their NET rankings are weak!! Home win against a reasonable Tiger team should help!!

Oklahoma 77 Mississippi State 65

The Sooners take the Bulldogs to task with power forward Brady Mannix hitting more 3s than a 3 for one happy hour at O’Connells Irish Pub in Norman!! Lately as Brady goes so do the Sooners!! Stay healthy and make your grades young man!!

Kansas 81 Tennessee 68

The Jayhawks have hung around the top 3 all year long and should he there at tournament time!! Tennessee no longer has Bruce Pearl to pick on and current coach Rick Barnes is to nice and successful as a Volunteer to abuse!! Still, playing Kansas at Allen Fieldhouse is like General Custer playing at the Little Bighorn Battlefield!

Oklahoma State 74 at Texas A&M 66

Texas A&M took care of the Cowboys in football at the Hooters 👀Bowl in December!! So, the Cowboys return the favor in Stillwater’s, Iba Arena! The SEC is looking weak in the basketball world and will have to refer to coach Saban for revamping the whole SEC basketball 🏀 scene!!

Arkansas 89 TCU 86

Coach Musselman defeats his old adversary Jamie Dixon in a close game at the Schollmeier Arena in Fort Worth! Numerous hog fans have jumped on the Muscleman/Arkansas bandwagon!! The Tyson Frozen Foods stock has skyrocketed since the basketball team has reached the top 25!!

************Upset Special************

Texas Tech 81 Kentucky 77

Tech coach Chris Beard knows exactly how to get transfers over to beautiful Lubbock, Texas!! First of all, have at least 10 cheerleaders with each prospect at all times his Senior high school year!! Secondly, Texas Tech’s United Supermarkets Arena gives each transfer free hot dogs for his or her life during each home game!

Kansas State 68 Alabama 64

K State Wildcats are on a 4 game winning streak and look like the Wildcats of the days of Jack Hartman!!

West Virginia 78 Missouri 77

Missouri’s small contingency of upper-middle-class fans in black and gold sweater vests were very intimidated by the Ma and Pa fans from Morgantown!! One Tiger fan was wearing a fur coat that was punched by a Mountaineer fan sitting on the next row!!

The rest of the FOS picks picked by the picker!

South Dakota 74 ORU 70

The Dakota Coyotes are no relation to the Wylie E. Coyotes of Looney Tune fame but they do have the imagination and trickery to beat the Golden Eagles!! ORU plays tough but the igloo accommodations of the town called Vermillion were not very hospitable!!

UConn 67 Tulsa 61

The Tulsa fans are getting restless and the restaurants on 11th Street are starting to close during TU events since restaurant ownership seems to save money by not opening on game day!!

Kansas 81 at Oklahoma State 71

Coach Self returns to Stillwater where he learned how to play basketball and flirt with cheerleaders!! Oklahoma State coach Mike Boynton is fast becoming a really good and well-respected man about town!! The OSU big men are no match for the KU hosses!!

Words of Wisdom from the unwise one! Never ever leave your favorite TU hat on the floor for your favorite dog to chew up!!

Have a great sports week!

B in T/ FOS