Sports and Politics/ College Basketball Picks

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Sports VS Politics

I owe a ton of gratitude to Dave from Sooner Politics Org for publishing my stuff!!  I ask myself ’What in the shack crap do sports and politics have in common’????!!!!!!   They both have a team or individuals opposed and trying to get another entity to move by brawn or brain to a defeated status!!  Sports has 4 to 41-year-olds trying to move or kick a ball made of pigskin over a line for the most points to win!!!  In politics, you have some youth and some shriveled up old farts in the Senate or House on one side arguing with the same staunch looking, suit wearing, windbags on the other side!!!  The Senate or House side with the most votes is the winner!!!  The same for football and all sports!!  Thus, there is little difference in sports and politics other than one is a lot more fun to write crap about than the other and I will leave that choice to you!!

NEXT WEEK WILL BE THE THE FOS TOP TEN THINGS SEEN AT LIGHTS ON AT UTICA SQUARE ON THANKSGIVING!!

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Faked Out College Basketball Picks!

Arkansas 72  Indiana 67

Is Bobby Knight still the coach at Indiana??  About 7 coaches ago bro!!  Razorbacks supporters are feeling good about the season!!  Which means it is time for Hog nation to panic!!

Florida 78 Oklahoma 70

Oklahoma announcer Toby Roland is one of the best play by play announcers in the nation but he cannot make Sooner Basketball be better than they are!!  

Oklahoma State 66 Charleston 64

The Cowboys pulled off an amazing win in the Old Spicy Guacamole after shave tournament!!

Tulsa 73 UALR 68

TU plays in the Continental Tire Holiday Las Vegas Wayne Newton Facial Product Tournament!!!  

NFL Picks!

Falcons 26 Cowboys 20

Dallas Cowchips lost their bid to get over .500 when the Dallas did not request a review on an obvious out of bounds throw by Atlana!!   A Lynch mob of close to 150,000 folks took the streets of Dallas looking for Jason Garrett!!!!

Chargers 29  Broncos  17

Broncos Quarterbacks Case Keenum and Oz Brockweiler are showing no consistency!!  Charger QB Phillip Rivers threw three touchdown passes over twenty-five yards and his 10 children were all at the game and delivered kisses to his little chubby chipmunk cheeks after each touchdown!!!

Steelers  27  Jaguars 13

Steelers defense is starting to play like the Steel Curtain of the old days!!  Maybe we should call them the new Platinum Curtain defense!!

Words of Wisdom from those who are damn old enough to give it:

”Never mix Armor bacon soda with powdered sugar and snort it”!!

B in T

Faked Out Sports

B, in T

First Dispensary and Prep 2nd Round Picks

First Hooch Dispensary!!

I visited my first Marijuana Dispensary last week and as I put down my Discover Card, my Banc First Card, my Target Card and my Spiegel Card for my 1 pound purchase the long-haired young man told me I needed a Medical Hooch Card!!!  I then said What the Fuuuurrrrriiiick are you talking about hippie dude????   He explained that I need to go to a person that will issue you a medical card because of your stroke neuropathy pain!!  I said Dilly Dilly dude, and went my way!!  I will need to follow up!!

Second Round Prep Picks

Jenks 48 Union 42 at Chapman Stadium

Jenks Trojans jazz band loses a halftime jazz band off to Union but the Trojans won the big game............to some.

Broken Arrow 45 Owasso 31 at Chapman Stadium

Miles Slusher recovered a fumble and intercepted a pass as the TIGERS defeated the Blankenship led Rams!!! BA Running Back Cortez has set numerous records while being recruited by numerous college football giants!!!

Bixby 38 Midwest City 31 at Owasso Stadium

Bixby Spartans defeats the West side preppy school by a touchdown while looking for another opportunity to beat the Hornets in the finals!!

BTWashington 41 Stillwater 33 at Jenks Stadium
Stillwater is good but not Dax Hill good!!  BTW can play with some Division II College teams on a good day but is still scary on an average day!!!

Bishop Kelley 36 Bishop McGinness 24
Catholic Clergy from Rome are in attendance for this mammoth game between to Bishop jogger not teams!  QB Zach Middleton of BK is small but tough, which is the BK motto!!

Tonkawa 34 Wayne 20
Tonkawa and their football stud named Simion put away an Oklahoma team named John Wayne!!  John Wayne's last movie scene was filmed on what is now called John Wayne Field Turf!!  True story, google it!

Wagoner 38 Bethany 28
This will be the 122nd playoff game in Wagoner this century!  Wagoner will have one million Christmas Lights turned on one hour before playoff game time!!!  The town folks will have shots of Peppermint Schnapps and stumble over to watch Wagoner defeat Bethany!!

B, in T

Opera Preparty VS Football Preparty

Opera Tailgate VS. Football Tailgate

Football tailgate is before the actual game, at a parking lot close by and usually has mass quantities of food and boos!! The Opera Tailgate is usually before the Opera and at a bar with food!’  Recently my wife and I had a tailgate party for the Opera and a football game!!  We actually skipped the game near 11th and Harvard and the Dracula Opera at the PAC and continued our night on the town!!  Dilly, Dilly!!!  We did use UBER!!

Faked Out College Picks!!

  



himself for a touchdown!!!  Unbelievable athlete is Heisman Murray, so much that numerous NFL teams are considering drafting his speedy butt in the first round!!!  His agent, speedy Gonzalez Scott Boros, is trying to get the contract with the Oakland A’s redone to include an NFL team, an NBA (Golden State, why not, they have everyone else) and a BocciBall team in Tulsa!!!   True story!!  

West Virginia 42 Oklahoma State 31

Ok State is a solid team with numerous players are anxious to
play next year and start the season over!!!  OSU would not mind another invitation to the Alamo Bowl but numerous Braums Alamode Pie Bowl representatives have been seen handing out
sample Almode Pies in Stillwater!!

        Sooners QB Heisman Murray threw a pass forty yards to

OU 62    KANSAS 13

                            Chicago Bears
                            Oakland As
                            Golden State
                            Palo Alto Bocce

Kansas State 35 Texas Tech 31

The young stud, skinny jeans, Ax gelled hair coach was defeated by the old fart, pleated purple slacks, Old Spice gelled coach!!  The Wildcats super surprised everyone by doing an end-around call which gained 3 yards and sent the crowd in a frenzy!!!





Mississippi State 38 Arkansas 27

Arkansas coach Guy Morris is hoping for better players in 2019 but his wish for an easier conference was a no go for the Jeanie in a Lamp!!!

Tulsa 30 Navy 27

Tulsa players cried tears of joy as they won their first road game since Drew Pearson was a baby QB at Tulsa!!!  (yes, he was a quarterback at TU, GOOGLE IT!)  Navy is not the same Navy team that has cheated Tulsa out of numerous games over the past few years!!!  

Texas 33 Iowa State 28

Freshman ’Clone Quarterback has not turned 18 yet and cannot drive a tractor in the state of Iowa or work as an air traffic controller over Iowa skies!!  He can control the high technically sophisticated Matt Campbell offense but not clear a jet through the Iowa skies!!

California 34 Stanford 27

Stanford stud running back Bryce Love is trying to put the whole team on his shoulders!!!  Unfortunately, Cal’s Freshman QB Chase Garber was extremely hot and threw for 3 touchdowns!!

Va Tech 37  Miami 30

Hokie Pokie head coach Justin Fuente, with Tulsa ties, upset the Hurricanes and may be the next coach at numerous top 5 conference teams!!

Wisconsin 35  Purdue  27

The Badgers kicked the Boilermakers butts!!

Central Florida 45  Cincinnati  32

CFU coach Josh Heupel has their offense running like a Mercedes Benz engine!!  Cincinnati is looking for a strong bowl!!  The Kale Salad Bowl representatives have attended 4 of the Bearcats games!!  

B, in T

Dallas Coach Should Try Coaching Not Playing on Off Week!!

Coach Garrett- No Time to Relax Dude

Dallas Cowgirls coach Jason Garrett was caught in camera at the World Series in Los Angeles while he was on his off week!!!  The 3-4 coach was also seen at some Laker and Clipper games while not studying film with his team!!  He was seen at an LA Kings hockey game eating pretzels with nacho cheese while his team was in their 5th hour of practice and wind sprints!!  He was also seen at the LA Galaxy soccer match talking with LeBron James while eating fried butter!!!  At the same time, his Cowgirls were having an all-night game film review!!!  True stories folks!!

Fake College Basketball Picks!!

TCU  91  ORU 68

ORU has tough road trip with the Horny Frogs but looks forward to this year with guard R.J. Fuqua and power forward Emmanuel Nzekwesi!!  

Tulsa 88.  S. Carolina State 80

Tulsa seems strong to follow up with a fourth place finish in the powerful AAC this year as they cruised past S. C. State!!

Arkansas 84  Texas 77

Love my Hogs this year and my ex TU classmate Coach Mikey Anderson!!  Tough test at the first of the season with the Longhorns and coach Shaka!!

Kansas 94  Vermont 74  NIT Classic

Kansas defeats the Vermont White Christmas Lodge team while playing with 4 FBI agents in disguised as fans behind the KU bench!!!

  

NFL Picks!

Chiefs 41 Cardinals 20

The Chiefs controlled the line of scrimmage, controlled the offenses, controlled the defenses, controlled the beer sales, controlled the cheerleaders, and even controlled the traffic in the air and on the streets!!  The Chiefs were dominant!!

Falcons 27  Browns 20

The Browns have officially been hosed by 3 wrong or no calls according to the head of Referees for the NFL!!!  This game had no bad calls but the Falcons QB, Matt Ryan, outperformed Baker Mayfield and later took him to McDonald's for a Happy meal when he finally quit crying!!  

Eagles 31  Cowboys 24

Eagles Quarterback Wentz picks apart the Cowboy defense again and leaves the coaching staff of Dallas wondering when the ax is to fall!!  Coach Howdy Dooty is more clueless than ever and needs to resign so Lincoln Riley can have a smooth transition to Dallas!!

lWords of wisdom from the staff of Faked OutSports:

A wise sports dude once said never put opioid pills in place of Optima 1 pills in your weekly pill box!!!!!

Have a blessed and wonderful weekend!!

B in T, Faked Out Sports

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B, in T

Is Cow Tipping a Sport!??

Cow Tipping is Now a Sport

The National Cow Tipping Team is located Coweta, Oklahoma and is just now getting the media exposure it needs by the journalists at Faked Out Sports!!  Urban legend insists that this is just a bunch of drunk frat boys messing with cow in a pasture!!  Wrong, there is a team of 7 that actually, sings or plays music to the cow for serenity, a  team that gently nudged Daisy to the ground and a team of cow fall spotters who are in charge of moving a large mattress underneath Daisy to cushion the fall!!  A good Cow Tipping Team Time is around fifteen minutes!!  The Center is putting together a Cow Tipping team!!

Faked Out Sports is reeeaaaallly a different type or writing!! 

Folks call it satire writing, humorous writing, not really writing, silly writing, or a pinch of sports writing!!  As long as one person reads and chuckles, and deciding this is going to be a great day, I have succeeded!!

Prep Playoff Picks!!

First Round!!

Bixby 48 Lawton 12

Bixby rips Lawton a new one!!  The Bixby youth football teams were rewarded with 9 championships this year and received their trophies at halftime!!  The 2-3 years old Tough Toddler trophies were the cutest and the league sponsor, Pampers, gave each team member a 48 count triple ply box!!!

Bishop Kelley 42 Skiatook 17

BK smashes the Skiatook Bulldogs at Prassa Field in front of crazed students before they headed into the night for hundreds of parties at unsuspected parent homes!!

Union 55 Edmond Sante Fe 12

Union and playoffs are terms that are side by side in the dictionary of high school sports!!

Broken Arrow 59 Moore 16

The Tigers offensive team weighs more than the entire Moore student body!!!  Only by 22 pounds!!!  I'm never wrong about my picks or weight statistics!!

Tonkawa 52 Concord 20

Buccaneer superstar known only as Simeon led the playoff pep rally by playing the bohemian rhapsody on his flute!!  The town of Concord is known for their grapes and wine, not for their football!!  This was very evident!

Jenks 42 Ponca City North 18

The Trojans use their athletic running backs and wideouts to dispose of an average west side team!!

Owasso 38 Norman 24

Owasso QB destined for North Texas is trying to get another gold ball for Coach Blankenship!!  It would be great for a coach to have 2 gold balls in Owasso!!

Wagoner 48  Ft. Gibson 12
There were 2,345 banners along main street of Wagoner wishing the team good luck against the mighty Ft Gibson hoot owls!!

BTW 38. Del City 22

The Hornets zonk Del City out of the playoffs!!  Michigan recruit Dax Hill was signing autographs in the third quarter!!  He also has a brand new Escalade with Michigan tags!!  Interesting!!

Stillwater 38 Muskogee 27

Stillwater QB Gunner Gundy will be leaving numerous young ladies at Stillwater High for T Boone State in one year!!!

Clinton 42 Cushing 24

I planned on attending this game to see my stud nephews but found that Clinton is closer to Wichita than Tulsa!!  

Plus the stands on the visitor side were used for the National Cow Chip throwing contest and reeked of cow poop!!!

B, in T

Top Ten Cowboy’s Next Coach Candidates

Calling for New Coach in Dallas

Every fuuurrrrricking year for the past umpteen years the Dallas    Cowboys football team has been average at best and really sucky at worst!!  Coach Howdy Doody looks totally clueless and has the    personality of a sloth on acid!!Time to make a change Jerry!!  Here are a few suggestions from Faked Out Sports for your next coach!!

1. Barry Switzer, he is younger than Bill Snyder!!
2. Lincoln Riley, would look good in Cowboy blue!!  He is numero uno pick!!
3. Mike Leach, best one-liners in college football!
4. Les Miles,  he has beaten Alabama! 
5. Mike Vrabel, Tennessee Titans, very hot commodity and great with the players, but stern!!
6. John DeFilippo, Offensive Coordinator Vikings, likes Italian food!!
7. Robert Saleh, Defensive Coordinator 49ers, long shot!!
8. Dabo Swinney, Clemson, greatest name in the history of coaching names!
9. Any of the four Tulsa area High School Stud Coaches at Union, Owasso, Jenks or Broken Arrow!!  David Alexander of Broken Arrow and former INFC 5th grade coach of the year seems to be the front runner!! 
10. Bob Stoops, Jerry Jones is having him and his wife over for some home cooking by their kitchen staff!

Long shot----- a young Cliff Kingsbury!!

Faked Out College Picks! 

Oklahoma 48 Oklahoma State 28

Bedlam is not nearly as Bedlamish as usual thanks to OU’s advantage at Quarterback!!  Both defenses combined, cannot stop any in-state NAIA, or Junior College offenses!!!  The OSU and OU cheerleaders had a cheer-off to the Drake challenge KeKe!!!  The Sooner female students started singing the song to ex Sooner wide-out DeDe Westbrook!!  ‘DeDe do you love me, thinking of me,’?!

Memphis 33 Tulsa  31

Road trips to Memphis are always eventful and the Tigers may have found another way to show TU how to lose a last-minute battle!

LSU  42  Arkansas 30

Coach Ed is looking good for National Coach of the Year!!  If LSU wins out he should be a lock as long as he doesn't have to speak!!  His voice can make babies cry and toddlers run!!

Texas Tech 42  Texas 34

Coach Kingsbury also known as Coach 9-lives seems to pull rabbits out of a magicians hat and move them straight to the starting Quarterback at Texas Tech!!  Numerous Big 12 teams seem to have no problem making QB changes and possibly using a Freshman or a Grad Transfer while some coaches are afraid to go out on a limb and make a switch!!  Coach Mullet???

West Virginia 45 TCU 27

TCU is trending towards a Poinsettia Hydra-lift Bowl in Billings, Montana!!  West Virginia Quarterback Will Grier is pretty cocky, his Heisman candidacy cannot be carried by his good looks alone!!  TCU coach Patterson is the new Tasmanian Devil, replacing ex-TU coach Todd Graham!!  When the 5’8” 230 pounds Patterson’s face turns red and he slams his headphones on the football turf it usually means that a player or a coordinator is about to get an earful jack shittocci mushrooms!!

Texas A&M 38 Ole Miss 31

The Aggies are working on a nice season under coach Jimbo Fisher!!

Nebraska 34 Illinois 24

Nebraska coach Frosted is no longer on the coaching lukewarm seat, with a couple of wins!!  Lovie Smith is feeling the heat so much that he has bought a moving company in Champaign to assist in his move back to the Mapleridge area of Tulsa a la Coach Pat Jones!!

Alabama 44 Mississippi State 31

Mississippi State Bulldogs kept somewhat close to the Alabama until the Tide’s defense started to dominate the line of scrimmage!!  Sour puss Saban even cracked a smile when their 5th sack was recorded in the third quarter!!

Georgia 42  Auburn 34

Georgia seems to have the Auburn Tigers number!  Coach Malzhan’s fly sweep, triple reverse, and hidden man gimmick plays are starting to backfire on he and his 70 million dollar contract!!

Washington State 45  Colorado 38

An improved Colorado Buffalo team puts a scare into Leach’s Cougar team but they prevail in the end thanks to their QB, 6th year Senior Gardner Minshew!!

***************Upset Special************

Michigan State 34  Ohio State 27

The Spartans snuck up on the Buckeyes and won a decisive Big Ten game!!  Coach Meyer is heading towards a two-year sabbatical after a season of high drama and losses!!

Penn State 34 Wisconsin 31

Wisconsin has a Freshman Right Tackle that is 6’9” and weighs 407 pounds soaking wet!!  He has not played yet but had a lot of fans in the Badger student section!!  Numerous female students have befriended him to keep the creepy looking fraternity dudes away!!! 

B, in T