Bryan in Tulsa
FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM
Family Bobbleheads:
Behind the Scenes 2022 PGA Championship, Southern Hills, Tulsa, Oklahoma:
My son and son-in-law, Lance and Andre both work at Southern Hills and work extremely hard!! I am very proud of the young men!! They were tucked away like secret agents during preparation for the 2021 Senior PGA Championship last year!! Crowds of 8,000ish roamed the hills of Southern Hills in 2021 and this year the crowds will be around 45,000 per day (pandemic aside)!! The work and sacrifice that is demonstrated by the Southern Hills staff were amazing last year and I feel confident that it will be even more remarkable this year!! Numerous roadblocks can appear before an event like a sanctioned PGA golf tournament may start!!
Crabgrass, moles, Coronavirus, tornado destruction, locust infestation, murder hornets, and rabid vampire bats have threatened major golf events over the last 10 years!! True shat, Google it!! Both of these young men have spent numerous hours studying the causes of murder hornets, moles, and crabgrass among other deadly items that may affect the 2022 PGA Championship at Southern Hills!! These are the items that my kinfolk put their backbone into getting the sterling results for the 2022 PGA Championship, at Southern Hills, Tulsa Oklahoma!! The Southern Hills board last week added a couple of concerns for the SH crew to be aware of:
1 - alien invasion where the alien’s head blows up when golf commentator Jim Nance speaks into a certain microphone, very messy and a nightmare for the Horticulture crew!! 2- an acute fungus gets into the Par Aide ball washer machines causing all the white balls to turn a ghastly blue-green color!! True shat, Augusta club members hired 70 folks to do nothing but clean blue balls all day! Stay tuned!!
B in T notes:
Is Harbaugh taking his Khakis to the Chicago Bears?
Why Harbaugh stays at Michigan-
Harbaugh has lived this long in Ann Arbor, so why leave!!
He has 134 pairs of Khaki pants with a Wolverine symbol on the left buttocks!!
Michigan QB J.J. McCarthy is the real deal and seems to be more advanced than the current Bear's QBs!!
If Harbaugh leaves, Bob Stoops is the early favorite to get the Michigan job!! Ha!
Why Harbaugh goes to da Bears-
Harbaugh would be an improvement for the reeling Bears for the first time since DITKA!
Harbaugh has great teeth and they would shine in dull Soldier Field!!
QB Justin Fields would benefit from Harbaugh but would the Bears or Harbaugh benefit from Fields?? I say NO!
Harbaugh will bring a great staff and a great collection of tuck-in-your-pants sweatshirts for the cold days at Soldier!!
B in T’s first visit to the Boot Barn!
My ‘WTF is she doing with him’ wife took my urban preppy brother and myself out hunting for a Gentlemen’s Brim Cowboy Hat!! Also known as an LBJ Hat!
I was a little bored when I jokingly asked the Hat Specialist if they had size 56 Wrangler Skinny Jeans? After I helped her up from laughing she told me I looked like a 54 normal fit!! Ha, nice humor from the young lady hat helper!! My brother got the Gentlemen's brim he wanted and a few laughs!
College Basketball picks:
ORU 78 North Dakota 72
The Golden Eagles have fun beating the slow logger men from the North with future NBA superstar Max Abmas running circles around them for 29 points, 10 assists, and 7 rebounds!! The new and improved ORU Mabee Center is looking the part of its basketball team!!
Texas 77 Oklahoma State 66
The Longhorns and the Cowboys have more talent than many in the Big 12! The Cowboys won by 13 at home and will lose by 11 on the road, this a 2 point win for OSU on a neutral court at Big 12 Tourney time!
Oklahoma 81 Baylor 77
Huge game! Bigger than big!! Students were sitting in tents all week to get into the smaller student section!! The overflow section learned that Bob Stoops purchased 2,000 more seats for the students to get in free!! True shat ladies and gentlemen!!
Freshman crowd favorite Bijan Cortez from Kingfisher, Oklahoma scored 6 points and had 11 assists and poked a Baylor defender in the eye with his long brunette hair follicles!!
Kansas 67 Kansas State 65
The Mildcats played their rivals from Lawrence close and fell short. C.B. Ochai Is the man for the Coach Self to lean on this year! The Jayhawks seem to play at their competition’s level which in the Big 12 that would be a good thing!!
Tulsa 70 Memphis 67
B in T makes a cameo appearance with courtside seats, thanks to his son-in-law!! I accidentally called Tigers head coach Penny Hardaway an overrated piece of shat and was given a yellow card by the TU security mall cops!! The game was seen on ESPN2 and also by Mrs. B in T who jacked me with a steel cast skillet when I walked in the door for cussing in front of the kids!!
NFL Playoff Picks:
Titans 31 Bengals 21
The Titans QB Ryan Tannehill 2 TD passes and the return of Jim Brown, uh, Derrick Henry gave the Titans enough to tame the Bengal!!
Packers 34 49ers 24
In true sportsmanship, during -12 degrees wind chill and a foot of falling snow the Packer equipment team shared their seat warming contraptions!! The Packer’s heated seats had green velvet cushions, a sound system, a minibar, and a fridge!! The visiting 49ers had metal seats borrowed from the local Y, hand warmers with SF stitched on, and earmuffs!! The above may or may not be true but allows me to
derive the Packers -10 degrees!
Bills 27 at Chiefs 21
Bills QB Josh Allen completed 24 of 27 passes for 3 touchdowns and Kermit Mahomes completed 24 of 30 with 3 thrown to the wrong team!!
Buccaneers 38 Rams 24
I constantly bet against Tom Brady and I constantly lose tralalala 🎶!! Now I am picking the Bucs to win whereas the Cardinals will win!! Makes sense!!
Have a great sports week!!
Bryan in Tulsa
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B, in T |
YOU, Mr. B in T are such a hoot! I've laughed out loud at your most recent report as well as the others. I read what happens to a fellow who yells overly enthusiastically at the Y games...HA!🤣 Also, how your brother's react to your news. Way to go Mr. B in T
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