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Monday, March 11, 2019

Tulsa Football Brings in Money? Put Down the Fatty!’/ Ex NFL Players USA Curlers!?!?


Faked Out Sports/B in T

FOS Notes

Is the University of Tulsa Football Program Really a Drain Financially on the Overall Athletics??

The Tulsa Football team will be traveling to Michigan State, in 2019, to Oklahoma State in 2020, to Oklahoma State and to Ohio State in 2021, to Ole Miss in 2022, to Washington in 2023 and to LSU in 2028!!  These trips will bring in an average of 1.2 million dollars in gross income per trip!!  No TU athletic team will sniff this gross income number!!  TU basketball made some small monies when making the NCAA tournament 9 times in 1981 through the early 2000s but have just played in 1 game in 2016 until now!!  Thus no cash flow from basketball in almost twenty years!!  So the next time I hear some dufus tell me how costly the football team is and why do they keep playing 2 for 1 against the Power 5 teams, I will drop some ”f” bombs!!  As a friend of mine often says “smokem if you gottem”!


Very Large Curling Team!!??

Would you believe that former NFL football players are striving to be in the Olympics in 2022 in the sport of Curling!!  No, I did not mix up my daily pill tray!!  True stuff!!  Ex NFL players Jared Allen, Mark Bulger, Keith Bullock and Michael Roos are all All-pros and are on the team!!  Former Olympian John Benton has agreed to Coach the team for free Viking tickets and an ice fishing out house of his choosing!!

Padres Spend A Half Billion for Mediocrity!

The San Diego Padres signed Manny Machado for 300 Billion dollars and he refuses to run out grounders!!  Great example for all little leaguers in the San Diego area!!  The Padres forgot to spend a little cashola on pitching!!  With starters such as Joey Lucchesi, Robbie Erin and Bryan Mitchell I feel comfortable stating that the team that spent a little under a half a bill for Muchada and Hosmer will break seventy wins if lucky!!  La de frickin da!

Zion’s Parents are Making the Call fo Play or no Play!!??

FOS conspiracy theory:  Zion Williamson's parents have told Coach K that he will not play the rest of the year!!  Coach K is sandbagging ESPN and the Dukey Nation!!  Never trust the beady-eyed Duke Coach!!  

FOS College Basketball Conference Tournament Picks!

Big 12 First Round Wednesday Kansas City

Oklahoma 80 West Virginia 71
Sooner superstar athletic director Joe Castiglione attempted to get permission from the Kansas City Kemper Arena to allow a miniature OU Boomer Sooner Schooner on the basketball court!!  The OU Schooner were to be pulled by miniature ponies before the game and at halftime!!  The Sooners were denied, even when they offered to use special miniature poop baggies!!


Oklahoma State 72 TCU 71
The Horny Frog players complained of stomach issues after eating at Arthur Bryant's BBQ!!  The coaching staff for the OSU Cowboys did eat at A-B's about an two hours prior to the Froggy team arrival!!  Three players for the Frogs were forced to miss the game due to excessive renal fluctuates!!  Both teams only had 6 scholarship players available!!  The horny toad mascot was also forced to miss the game!!  Awful publicity for Kansas City BBQ folks!!

American Athletic Conference Thursday Memphis Fed Ex Forum

Tulsa 77 SMU 70 
The Golden Hurricane win game for the opportunity to play the Houston Cougars who are arguably the hottest team in all of College Basketball!!  TU defense clamped down on the SMU team that led by 8 at half!!  Tulsa big man Martins Inagba had a big game with twenty points and eight rebounds!!  The TU and SMU AARP alums had another almost rhubarb at their pre-party before tip-off!  The SMU elders notice that their buffet did not have the same amount of starch that the TU buffet did!  Just as the TU and SMU Happy Timer ladies began to come to blows,  the Fed Ex arena staff brought out some mashed cauliflower casserole to save the day!!  The men exchanged their personal party flasks



FOS MLB

Cardinals
Pitcher Carlos Martinez has been shelved for the first two weeks of Spring ball!  Look for the Cardinals to take a hard look at Carlos in the back end of the bullpen this year!!  His stamina and arm strength are more suitable for relief roles and his ERA was almost a point better in relief last year!!

Cubs 
First baseman Anthony Rizzo has taken over the leadership role for the Cubs in spring training.  He has recently stated that the intensity must start the first game of regular season and continue until they win the world series!!  Dreams do come true in Disney World Rizzo?!?!

FOS Thunder Nation

As I attended the Thunder vs Grizzlies game last week I noticed the crowd in my area was very frustrated in Mr Westbrook continued shooting and missing shots from beyond the 3 point line!!  With 5 minutes left and behind by by eleven points Westbrook this time backed up 5 more feet behind the 3 point line and as the crowd around me screamed ’no’ he swished the next shot THROUGH the hoop!!  He then rallied the Thunder for a win and B in T and his wife left the Chesapeake happy that Westbrook was on their side!!  Dilly frickin Dilly!!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one!!
Never drink Jaeger then use a cane to walk!!

Have a great sports week!!

FOS/B in T


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