Save your pet's ears this 4th of July!

Fourth of July- please play music for your pets during the fireworks!!  It should be very soothing, like Cat Stevens!!  Below are six of B in T top dog songs to play during the fireworks!

Play these six songs on auto-repeat during the 4th of July and your 🐕 dogs will sleep like puppies!

1.Whose That Doggie in the Window - The Archies- that is believable, right?

2.Who Let the Dogs Out - Bahaha Men - has been played in approximately 14 billion sports scenarios over the last 25 years!!  

3.Theme from ‘Lassie’- Pink Floyd - must be on acid trip for full effect, not recommended for pet listening!

4.Hound Dog - Elvis Presley

Probably would be number one but hound dogs don't cry all the time according to my veterinarian!!

5.Gypsy, Joe, and me - Dolly Pardon - which is the dog, Joe or Gypsy?  The story goes: Gypsy, Joe’s dog, was hit by a car and killed!  Joe then caught Pneumonia and died, and Dolly is the girlfriend!  All of Dolly’s songs require a grief psychiatrist!!

6. I Love This Dog - Cat Stevens - actually Henry and Kodak both howl at Cat’s music!

ESPY Awards for best Team:

🥎👀🥎👀🥎👀🥎👀🥎👀🥎👀

•OU Softball

• Kansas City Chiefs

• Denver Nuggets

• Vegas Golden Knights

• Vegas Aces

• Georgia Bulldogs

• LSU women’s hoops

Sooner girls were the most dominant team in any sport!!

Bryan in Tulsa

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

BOBBLEHEAD FAMILY SPORTS

Hot Wheels during Electricity Outage in Tulsa!!

Air Conditioned Hot Wheels for 7 days last week!!  God loves our kids and grand kids!!

B in T Rants:

B in T Prediction:  A/I will interrupt the 2024 Presidential Election!! Artificial Intelligence will raise its ugly face as a cyborg Trump attempts to take over the Governments of America, Russia, North Korea, and Jamaica!  The Cyborg Trump with Lazor bean eyes stinks out numerous Democratic leaders before being stopped by Glade Potpourri-scented missiles released by Sleepy Biden!!  True Story!!  More to come!

This commercial was paid for by anyone but Biden or Trump for President!

I love ❤️ Omaha!!

LSU 48k jello shots are 10 times the previous Rocco’s Bar College World Series record!!  Also 10 times more shots of the Florida Gators, their finals opponent!!  ORU held their own in 5th place, 3000 ahead of TCU!!  Texas Christian, in last, donated all 778 shots to Dallas Christian Church for Communion!!  True story, Zod!!

TU - TV Games announced!!

And Vvveeeerrryy Interesting!

8/31 vs. -University of Arkansas Pine Bluff ESPN+, 7 pm- debut of Coach Wilson at TU, don't miss it!!

9/9 at Washington, Pac 12 Network  4 pm.   Oh God, homer announcers from PAC and will turn the TV down, listen to Ron Howard and Rick Couri!!

9/16 vs. Oklahoma, ESPN or ESPN2, 2:30 pm at Tulsa but the Sooner crowd will outnumber us and be more voicestrus!!

9/28 vs. Temple, ESPN, 6:30 pm. Grand lake party with old frat farts after the game!!

10/19 vs. Rice, ESPN or ESPN2, 6 pm- Ok, just watch and hit the sack!!

College Football Programs with the Most Wins All Time:

**I can't believe Tulsa and App. State are this frickin high❗

Of course TU has had a team since the 1920s! 

#1 Navy 733

#2 Army 720

#3 Miami OH 713

#4 Cincinnati 658

***5  Appalachian State 654-you can get very high at this altitude location according to App State Campus Police!

***at 3,333 feet (1,016 m)****

#6 Central Michigan 643

#6 Tulsa 643

#8 Louisiana Tech 638

#9 Fresno State 636

#10 Marshall 623

Five-Star Defensive End EDGE Colin Simmons and Livvy Dunne at the On3 NIL Elite Series👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 

‘Bama and Nick Saban know how to recruit!!

After some toilet accidents while watching Gus and Ana - I am proud to announce a new pristine toilet at the kids and Papi's assigned bathroom!!

Thank you, Andre, my new favorite son-in-law!!  Haha, JK!

MLB

Pick the right team with the correct cartoon, and get a large bag of brownies!

                                      

1.Cardinals - swing and a miss the entire team for the entire season!

                                         

                                   2 Blackwell Flycatchers

Two young men on this team are engaged to the daughters of two  Blackwell families!!

                                        

                                      3 Cubs 

Surprisingly, still average but at least ahead of the Cards!

1	Brewers	35-34	.507	-	W1
2	Reds	35-35	.500	0.5	W6
3	Pirates	34-34	.500	0.5	L4
4	Cubs	32-37	.464	3.0	W4
5	Cardinals	27-43	.386	8.5

                                          

There is no way that the Rangers can be this hi....                                    

in the AL Central!

4 Rangers

                                         

                                       5 Royals

The Royals are rumored to be moving to Blackwell, Oklahoma for the 2025 season!!

                                       

                                   

6 Astros-playing like aliens that drank too much bong stuff!

                                         

7 Brewers

The Brewers are sneaking up to the NL Central pack of rats!!!

Have a great sports week!

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org

B, in T

Sponsors: Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson & Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc. Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL) Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK) MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO) Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK Dr. Richard Stephens DDS Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

Golden Eagles in Omaha!

At this time in the universe, OU Softball is the rallying point for all Oklahoma University sports!!  Not football!  Write this down, B in T called it!!

ORU gear vs the Oregon Nike Lulu Lemon gear🍋!!

Ritsy Oregon fans have matching Nike ✔️ outfits while all the ORU folks have garage sale tattered Richard Fuqua T-shirts!  Hey Nike Duckies, have fun watching ORU on ESPN in the College World Series!!  Put that shat in your bong pipe and smoke it, Ducks!!

Although trite sounding, I write this blog for myself, to keep thestroke-aftermath Bryan in Tulsa-SANE!!  And of course notes from one of my frat brothers makes these sports rants so very worthwhile!!  

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I received this note a couple of weeks ago:

‘Bryan,

 

Whether I read the whole thing or just peruse, your posts always put a smile on my face – thanks for that.  And you’re right on – life is so fragile and unpredictable; we never know- especially the older we get.  So just in case, I want you to know I am grateful to be on your mailing list and to call you my Brother!’

 

In ZAX,

Here is our pledge class with the members looking over us!

B in Ts Lambda Chi Tulsa Pledge class, third from the left, second row from the bottom, standing with a large forehead you will find a young B in T!

Thanks brother Dan the Man!!  Love these guys!❤️

JK bros!  The above pictures are actually OLDER!!  HA!

Bryan in Tulsa

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

A few weeks aga Bill Haistens did a great article that really got me fired up to Oklahoma high school football!!  He, Barry Lewis, Guerin Emig, and Jimmy Trammel have always been encouraging to me about my shatty writing after my stroke 10 years ago!!  Taking time after their 12-hour, or more, work day to work with me has always meant so much!!  I always admired the Tulsa pigskin pickers and have never missed a day since I could read in the 1940s!!  Ha!  Bill even thought some of my writing was on par with the picker!!  Thanks, Bill but you are kind!

Ok, enough reminiscing!  

🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈🏈

Bill’s article talked about a recent Bixby football camp attended by nationally ranked Bixby, super prep number 1 ranked East St.Louis High, Bentonville, Arkansas, Bentonville West, Union Tulsa, and Edmond among others!!  It seemed as though East St. Louis players at the camp were 6’8” inches and over, from wideouts to placekickers!!  But the mighty Bixby Spartans could keep up with the East St Louis Space Jam Monstars!!  See pic of the East St. Louis team below:

The Bixby Spartans have a young freshman nose guard 5’10” and 245lb that literally can go from sideline to sideline with the Monstar’s wide receivers and make the tackle!!

CAN’T WAIT FOR HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL AND THE PICKER WHOEVER THE FUDGE HE IS!!  PS I would love to be the guest picker just to say I finally know who he is!!  Hehehehe!

Bobblehead Family Sports

Women’s golf is the only college sport with extra scholarships every year!  With 5 granddaughters and an ex-pro golfer/Southern Hills Assistant Pro in the family, I vote for WOMENS GOLF SCHOLARSHIPS!!  Many of the schools unused girls scholarships are in non-power 5 conferences, DII, DIII and Junior College!!  Lots of great colleges in those levels!!  You're welcome!

B in T Sports Rants:

There are times when local folks in Tonkawa and Blackwell OK, swear that wild turkeys walk Main Street each Friday night!  If you check the counters of the local liquor store you will notice Wild Turkey Bourbon is empty!  This will explain the sighting of Wild Turkeys on Friday Night Lights season!

Let me get this straight, the National Security Advisor dude, albeit in charge of national security for the entire nation and the Sectert , had his house broken into!!  Armed CIA dudes were on ‘watch’ while watching the Lakers beat the snot out of the Warriors!!  WTF!!  The gentleman was drunk and a pissed off Warriors fan!  That REALLLLLLY scares the shat out of me!  Our next Prez should be Jason Bourne in 2024!  

They won't get in his house and he don't need no CIA dudes!  Bourne only needs a fish guttin knife and a shotgun!

Forbes Advisor picks Oklahoma as the 4th worstest drivers in the USA!!  High level of deadly accidents, most turtles smashed per capita and a high level of texting while adjusting makeup accidents (number 1 in the nation)!  Geeeesh what a shock!

Downtown Tulsa rush hour!!

MLB - One word to describe the season thus far!

Cardinals:  Cardinal Manager MUST BE FIRED IMMEDIATELY!!!  

Yo yo- down then up!  Then way down again!!  Currently Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy 

DOWN!!

Cardinal Yoyo in B in T 

Man Cave!

Blackwell Flycatchers

Inaugural - 1st season of pro baseball in Blackwell since 1849!!  Abner Doubleday visits Blackwell!

After the first couple of weeks, the Flycatchers have won 2, lost 7 to another team, and lost 5 to the weather!!  With a home record of 0 and 3, the Blackwell folks brought out the secret weapon to appease the fan base!!  Two for one Aunt Maybelle Cherry Pies!!  The crowd was enormous and fans from Kay County Fair to the McCurtain County Fair went crazy for Aunt Maybelle and her Cherry pies!!  The games have been fairly decent but the farm town USA atmosphere is second to none! 

Cubs

Repeat- no not the repeat of the 2016 Cubs World Series but the repeat of many, many, many sub-.500 seasons since 2016!  Sorry Cub fans but here we go again!!

Astros

Savior - In late May the Savior, aka Jose Altuve, returned from injured reserve to carry the Stros to the Promise Land!

Rangers

Heat -In the past, the hotter the weather the more the Rangers suck, not the year, at 18 games over .500 bring on da heat!!

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Royals

Dejavu- 16-36 is the same exact record the Royals had this time last year!

Have a great sports week!

Bryan in Tulsa

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicatedSoonerPolitics.org

B, in T

Sponsors: Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson & Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc. Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL) Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK) MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO) Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK Dr. Richard Stephens DDS Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU

Love me some ORU Baseball

 GUYS!!  GUYS!!  GUYS!! Actor Ethan Hawk, who is visiting Tulsa and possibly the Center for The Physically Limited, stopped by Saint Francis Hospital to visit me last weekend!!!!  NO SHAT!!  I dressed up in my room, fixed my hair, cleaned out my catheter, and gave him my best lines from Bryan in Tulsa!!!!!!  He actually did some great fake laughs!!  Great guy and he promised me a part in his next movie!

Where is Waldo Ethan's next stop?????

         Where's Waldo Ethan

          Next?????????????

Only two area teams left in ⚾️and🥎are left!!  WOW!!

-I can claim ORU becuz my lovely daughter-in-law Keli went to ORU!

-I can claim OU because my lovely daughter Jordan and suave and Deboner's son-in-law Clark went there!!

ORU Baseball vs Oregon Ducks in the Oregon Super Regional.  AGAIN, NO respect for the Golden Eagles!

OU Softball vs Florida State

AND THEN THERE WERE TWO!

Oklahoma softballer Jayda Coleman made a statement that made my stroke-banged-up brain ponder and should make EVERYONE think more about double standards in sports!  Her point was basically - we see Major Leaguers showing competitive swagger by flipping bats after home runs, college baseball players throwing helmets after bad calls, and football players staging fake photo ops celebrations after touchdowns!  Although Ms. Coleman thought ‘Well eff this shat’ she did not say it out loud but should have!!  The OU girls still do cheers and songs every second of every frickin game while adding the bat flip after a homerun and were criticized by their peers!  So a bat flip after an intentional walk by a meek, mild OU player (I loved the creativity) incensed a few who should consider getting a life!  Girls keep bat tossing like the men!  Perhaps the girls should take an idea from NFLer Randy Moss and show their backside!!

Come on OU girls do it to the critics!!

75 Days till College Football Kickoff!!

*Brownies optional.......or not!

Bryan in Tulsa

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

Bobblehead Family Sports

Gussy’s team won the league championship game, 4 to 2 against a team from Mizzou!  His team has their own nutritionists so the post-game snacks are the following:

*Sugar-free Oranges - wtf!

*Cinnamon Rice cakes 

*Sugar-free water by Dansi

*No Salt Pretzels

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Don't tell the team parents but Gussy’s Papi had double jalapeno with cheese sausage rolls in the trunk of the Mimi-mobile!!  The day was saved by Mimi and Papi!

Congrats to the future Tulsa Metro All-Star team!  

Side note:

Nowhere was Where’s Waldo Ethan found to the dismay of the crying 10 and under soccer kids!! 😪😪😪😪😪😪😪😪😪

B in T Rants:

When is the Quick Trip on steroids coming to Oklahoma?

When will, Bu-cees the cute varmint, put a massive Woodland Hills Mall smack dab in the middle of the Turner Turnpike in Oklahoma??  Not never according to Michael T., a former QT high-level executive, who appeared on 60 Minutes discussing why Bucees is not in Oklahoma!  He is stating varmint laws in Oklahoma and gambling/weed laws are the main culprits holding back Bucees in Oklahoma!

Stay tuned for more protests pro-Buc-ees in Oklahoma 2023!! 

Bryan in Tulsa 2023 Top 10 College Quarterbacks:

1.Caleb Williams, USC- who else, stolen from OU to SC but this future NFL #1 pick could QB Friends University and win the Heisman!

2.Drake Mayne, North Carolina big kid who could play for 3 years under-bumbling coach Mack Brown and still be a first-round draft choice!!

3.KJ Jefferson, Arkansas has the nation's best RPO QB who at the same time can run over linebackers with a stiff arm pinky!!

4.Bo Nix, Oregon - He must be good, he has been in college 11 years, through three pandemics, a Trump election and legalized maryjane in 32 states!

5. Michael Pratt, Tulane, tough kid and a serious gamer!  Saw him knocked unconscious against OU 2 years ago, come back the next series, and almost derailed the Lincoln Riley machine!

6.Jayden Daniels, Kansas another RPO QB with a gun arm!!

7.JJ McCarthy, Michigan

8.Spencer Rattler, South Carolina- add another former OU QB on the list!

9.Braylin Braxton, Tulsa whatever, he will be the breakout player of the year in 2023 and will transfer to Oklahoma State next year!

10. Dillon Gabriel, Oklahoma

He runs the Jeff Lebby offense to perfection, the 5’11” lefty will take the Sooners to new heights this year!

Steroid supplier is making so much $$$ or bank thanks to the new Russian weight trainer at Bixby Spartan Athletics!  

               Bixby 2nd Grader

                           JK!!

Jimmy Dean Sausage are my favorite sausage just ahead of Blue and Gold Sausage!!  I remember Jimmy Dean as a country singer, but I still think he is alive every time I hear the sausage sizzle on today's Jimmy Dean commercials!

MLB

Cardinals

With Arenodo and Goldschmidt on fire we have failed to mention the other Nolan!!  Second baseman/DH OF/ 3B and emergency catcher Nolan Gorman is among the tops of the NL in HRs, RBIs and SLG!!  The pitching for the Birds is HORRENDOUS!  Worst ever in Cardinal history!!  Coach Marmoll needs to start packing NOW!!

Flycatchers

The Blackwell Flycatchers won their first professional game since Grandpa Tom was a baby!!  We miss u Grandpa Tom!!  The home opener in Garden City, Kansas was won by the Flycatchers over the Wind

9 to 2!!  The Flycatcher fans had a game-watching party at The Hideaway Bar in Tonkawa!

Can't wait to see a game and visit The Hideaway!!  I will buy the first 10 rounds at The Hideaway!!  I am very safe with this offer cuz none of our relatives read B in T!!  

Cubs

From 1st to last place is separated by 5 games!!  What a dog NL Central Division!!  Cubs are mired with a 2 games under .500 record and heading to the butt of the Division behind the Cards!

Astros

The Stros are 2 games behind the Rangers!!  20 years ago today Nolan Ryan put Robin Ventura in a headlock and pounded the top of poor Robin’s head like a Pinata!!  What does this have to do with the Astros?  Nolan did pitch for the Astros and most of his success was in Houston.   He learned to steal signs from the Astros.  Most of all he learned how to fight in the pubs in Houston!!

Rangers

The Rangers keep on keepin' on and will start selling playoff tickets July 1st!!

Royals

In late May the Royals swept the Cards, I binge-drank Diet Dr. Pepper for hours!  Very depressing, college football 

is only 75 days away!!

Brewers

The Brewers lead the sinking ship called the National League Central with a 2 over .500 record!  Powerhouse division bro!!  Haha!!

Have a great sports week!

Bryan in Tulsa

by B in T - FakedOutSports, syndicated in SoonerPolitics.org

B, in T

Sponsors: Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson & Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc. Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided

Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL) Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK) MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO) Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK Dr. Richard Stephens DDS Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU