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Tuesday, October 29, 2019

Boxing Turtles VS Fighting Chickens

B in T Faked Out Sports

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

FOS notes ’bout Nuthin!!

Man in Tulsa has been Arrested for Smuggling Box Turtles!!

B in T has not covered the sport of boxing but now that I know that there is an illegal sport where actual turtles box I am glad to state I will not cover this sport!!  Smuggling turtles to other states for the purpose of gambling on these poor innocent slow creatures is awful!!  I will admit that when I first started B in T, I covered chicken fighting in Kay County, Oklahoma!!  But I refuse to cover any sport with boxing abuse to Turtles!!
Poor little turtle paws!

Dallas Super Scoop Reporter Finds List of Top 5 Replacements for New Coach for the Cowboys!!  

This scribbled note in Jerry Jones own handwriting (documented by Duey, Forgem, and Howe) gives B in T the following finalists to replace Howdy Doody Coach Garrett:

Jerry’s note read:

Possible new coach for my America’s Team:
  1. Bob Stoops -  I could get him cheap
  2. God - He might give me eternal life so I might get to see my Boys in the Super Bowl!
  3. Lincoln Riley - he might be too expensive!
  4. Jennifer Lopez - She would not make any decisions unless approved by me!!  Just like our current Garrett dude but much prettier!
  5. My son, Steven - put him on the list to make him feel good only!  No chance!
  6. Donald Trump - he knows everything about dealing with alien countries, so dealing with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell, Satan or myself should not be an issue!!
  7. Me- who else?



FOS/B in T Top 10 Scariest Movies!!!!

  1. Hocus Pocus- Bette Midler’s teeth are very scary!
  2. Jeepers Creepers - That dude still scares the shat out of me!  
  3. The Hills Have Eyes - Creepy looking folks that remained in the hills after an accident at a nuclear testing site!!  They remind us of Philly fans after losing to the Dallas Cowboys!  
  4. Wrong Turn - Some kids take a wrong turn en route to a Kid Rock Concert and end up dinner for some young cannibals!!  
  5. Chucky - A doll that looks like Howdy Doody with zits comes to life and stabs his victims with a knife bigger than he is!!
  6. Halloween - The very first scary movie with Jamie Lee Curtis and Michael Meyers!!  This was based on a true story that happened in Blackwell, Oklahoma in 1977 when a Halloween party turned a young man into a crazed slasher by simply shooting him in the butt with a BB Gun!!  True story!  Google it!!
  7. The Exorcist - I had a childhood crush on Linda Blair until this movie!!
  8. H20 Halloween - The Halloween crew gets together 25 years later and scares the crap out of Jamie Lee Curtis again!!  You would think JLC would realize this is just another movie!!
  9. Pumpkin Man Lives - ðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒðŸŽƒThis is a brand new horror movie filmed in Tulsa, Oklahoma by Tulsa's own movie maker, director and personal friend of B in T, John Swab!!  Marilyn Manson plays Pumpkin Man, Jamie Lee Curtis plays a possessed elderly lady named Mona, and Brad Pitt plays Tulsa Mayor Bynum!!  B in T is the movie advisor!!
  10. It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown - I now record this for my Grandkids, my how time goes by!

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻

At my age, I have a few things left on my bucket list!!  Going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras is one and staying in Costa Rica at a nice casa is another!!  Other than that I would l like to see my Golden Hurricane in a significant bowl someday!!  In fact after those accomplishments, you can change the ’b’ in bucket list to an ’f’!!!



BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! Charlie Brown!!

Whenever I see Dallas Cowboy Coach Howdy Doody Garrett talk at a post-game press conference I here the teachers talking on a Charlie Brown holiday special!!  BLAH BLAH BLAH!Whenever I here Owner Jerry Jones speaking I turn off the TV and go on my back patio and take a smoke!!

FOS Bobblehead Sports!!

Mr. and Mrs. B in T went to Houston to visit our relatives and watch the mighty Aggies lose to the Crimson Tide Machine!!  We watched the Astros, Cardinals, and TU lose that weekend but had tons of fun and tons of beer!!  The sports highlight was indeed going to watch Mrs. B in Ts cousin’s daughter participate in a high school cross country track meet before heading to College Station for mass quantities of beer and mayhem!
As Mrs. B in T’s cousin's daughter, Claire finished in the top 5 of the Junior Varsity 2 mile run I noticed many similarities between the Houston and Tulsa sports parents!!
Both Tulsa and Houston parents bring orange slices to all events; both parents know nothing about the sport their youngster is playing in, but act like they do, and both Tulsa and Houston parents party too much for morning sporting events on a Saturday!!  Finally B in T or any distant relative showing at a quiet morning child sporting event should not curse during the event!!  Wouldn't be prudent!  I know!!



B, in T
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1 comment:

  1. a possessed elderly lady named Mona? Is this the one I dated in H.S.? Help me out here bro...

    ReplyDelete