B in T Crossfit/2020 OU Spring Game Entertainmwnt

May 2

Faked Out Sports / B in T

FOS Notes ’bout nothin!

Cross fit at the Center!!

I will be starting a customized CrossFit regiment at the Center!!

  1.  Bocce Ball practice for 30 minutes!    

       Then followed by a fruity smoothie!

2. New sauna room in Hardesty Sports Complex with lava rocks and lava lamps heated at 139.50 degrees for thirty minutes!  Then followed up with a ShirleyTemple frozen daiquiri with 2 pink umbrellas!!

3. Finally, the last leg of my 1 and a half hour cross fit ends up at the new Hardesty Tanning bed for fifteen minutes on each side!!  Upon finishing the cross fit workout I will head to local Sonic for 2 double cheeseburgers and a diet Coke!!

WARNING:  THIS WORKOUT MUST HAVE SPOUSAL APPROVAL!

First Kids Control the Remote Control, Then the WORLD!!

In Papa B in T’s house and the second influx of children/toddler into my man cave, there are odd things happening!!  Numerous saved items have replaced replays of OSU, OU, and TU football games!!  Items such as Paw Patrol, Marsha Bear, Moana, and Simba Pride Lion King have mysteriously infiltrated my man cave!!  Help!!  The scary part is that when the little rug rats leave the cave, Papa B in T subconsciously continues to watch episodes of Paw Patrol!!  Dear Lord, please let football season get here QUICK!!

At the Sooner Spring Game Oklahoma University Spent One Hundred and Fifty Smackers for Forty Fricking Minutes of Country Music From Who?

I thought Lee Brice was my insurance dude!

Next year spring game FOS suggestions:

1. For 50k and Bud Light keg, Branson’s Legendary Ballknobbers!
2. For 15k Elvis Presley impersonators dressed as OU cheerleaders!!
3. For 40k Late Boxcar Willy’s son, Cabcar Chillin, rapping Boomer Sooner!!
4. For the same 150k, country western megastar Garth Brooks will sing 3 stanzas of I’ve Got Friends in Low Places’!!  
5. For 150k Earth, Wind and Fire will play Boogie Wonderland in red Sooner Speedos!!
6. For 125k Tulsa’s GAP Band will play their hit single: ’You Dropped a Bomb On Me Baby’!!  They will be accompanied by the Booker T Washington High School Drumline band!!  This is B in T’s pick!!
7. For 150k Justin Bieber will sing one hit song ’Baby, Baby’ while wearing Kid Gap Sooner Wear for 10 minutes!!
8. For 100 dollars and a keg of gummy bears B in T's grandkids will sing the famous ’Baby Shark’ song using ’Boooomer Sooner’ da da da da da!!

FOS MLB

Cardinals look like they did last year —very average!  

Cubs look like they did last year— ugly but winning!!

Astros look like they did last year— good but this year much gooder!!

Royals look like they did last year--  slightly less suckier!!

Red Sox look nothing like they did last year--  record number of losses 

Brewers look like they did last year-- STEROID CHEATERS!

Yankees look like last year --  best team money can buy!!

Dodgers look like last year-- same!  Large payroll, great talent all through the farm system!  Keep Magic Johnson as far away from decision making for the team as humanly possible!

Words of Wisdom from the Unwise One: 

Never eat 7 deviled eggs at a family holiday function!!  

Have a great sports week!!

B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B, in T

Sargent Carter VS. Bruce Pearl.

Faked Out Sports/B in T

FOS Notes ’bout nothin!

Big 12 Basketball Coaches are Hot Items!

OU Coach Lon Krueger possible candidate for UCLA coaching job?  He says no but the sources say yes!!  What happened to TCUs Jamie Eddie Munster hair Dixon?  UCLA did not want to pay a 100 million dollar buyout for young Munster hair!!  B in T is also hearing that ex Longhorn coach Rick Barnes is also being courted by the Bruins!!  What's up with the Big 12 basketball coaches in the fray for numerous basketball jobs!!  Frank Haith to UCLA?  Luke Walton to UCLA?  Bill Walton to UCLA?  Cheater Desperate Housewives mom to UCLA?  Seriously!?

The Sargent vs The Car Salesman!

Sargent Carter and Bruce Pearl are very similar in appearance when yelling!

                

Arkansas is Tops in the Southeastern Conference in one item!! 

Southern Living Magazine has named Fayetteville, Arkansas as the number 1 place to live in the SEC!!  Beautiful rolling hills and a college campus right smack dab in a picture from Campus Life!!  The Razorback fans and alums are thrilled to be tops in one SEC category!  Hopefully, the basketball and football fans will move up in the standings as far as their hometown Fayetteville!!

Which Do You Like- Godsmack or Korn?

I was hoping Godsmack would replace Ozzie Osborne at the famous Rocklahoma on May 24th!!  B in T has attended Rocklahoma thirteen years in a row!!  I was on the mosh pit committee for 5 of those years!!  Korn has been agreed to fill in for Ozzie if they were allowed to also play in the Bixby Green Corn Festival!!  What a deal, no Godsmack, but I can hear Korn twice within weeks!!

NFL Draft 

How serious are the Las Vegas Raiders about OU QB Cuyler Murray?  B in T says they are damn serious!!  Coach Jon Gruden will give away all his 2020 and 2021 draft picks to get a shot at coaching a QB shorter than he is!!

Ed Oliver is a 6’2” 280lb defensive tackle from Houston that ran the 40-yard shuffle faster than some wideouts!!  FOS projected 1st round Buffalo Bills!

The New England Patriots have offered pictures of Mr. Kraft at a massage parlor, purchased from TMZ, to move up in the first round!!

MLB

The Redbirds look fairly average.  The Redbirds are hitting .225 and are hitting the long ball but nothing else!!  The Cards relief pitchers do not put kerosene on the fire when they enter the game.  The Card pitchers set off a nuclear warhead inside of an atom bomb!!!  The Cubs look fairly bad and their superstar GM Theo Epstein takes the blame for the Cubs sucking!  Their super stud Krissy Bryant is very quiet since blabbing about the Cardinals and their fans!!  The Astros with Altuve and Corria starting to hit the ball hard and Verlander is the most feared pitcher with the hottest wife in the Majors!!  

Words of wisdom from the unwise one:

Never diet during the Holidays 🎄!!  Never stop smoking Jamaican cigarettes during the Holidays!!

Have a great sports week!

B in T/FOS

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM 

B, in T

Tulsa Center Bocce Team May Be Best in USA!!

Faked Out Sports/ B in T

FOS Notes!

******16 DAYS TILL BOCCE MID AMERICA TOURNAMENT IN OVERLAND PARK,KANSAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!******

Twelve of the Center for Physically Limited’s Motley Crew are headed to match skills with some of the best bocce ball players in the Midwestern United States!!  Our bocce coaches are George ‘Of the Jungle’ and David ’Go Cheifs’.   B in T has made the trip as a team manager and was saved by not having to take any Kansas drug test!!  As a team manager, I will be responsible for making sure that each bocce player has his or her correct balls and their balls are clean and shiny!  I am responsible for building team morale on the bus!! Two years ago B in T was also removed from bocce competition for simply calling the queen judge an ’old hag’!!  This year the Tulsa bocce board has allowed me to return to Overland Park as long as 2 staff members (Vickie and Kelly) are with me in the gym at all times!!  I have not received a board ruling on potty breaks!!??  Two returning Midwest champions from the Center will be headed to Kansas as well!!  Janice nicknamed ’Thunder Boomer’ for her explosive throws that have a radioactive effect on her opponent!!  The other superstar bocce player is Sherri nicknamed ’Wonder Woman Witch’!!!  Sherri is known for being so nice at the start of each bocce match and giving her opponent the bird at the end!!  Sherri will put on the goody two shoe appearance then competitively rips their throat out!!  Don't let her fool you, as the song by Hall and Oats goes- ’She's a Man Eater’!!  Other Center Members who could win the Open Division Midwest Championship are Jeanie ’Frogetta’ Gary ’Weedman’, Ron ’Preacher Man’, Mamie ’Styling’  Pam ’My Apartment is on Fire Again’ Stephanie ’Headphones on---- Don't bother me’, Wheel Chair Division- Sean ’Always Smiling’, Spencer ’Ladies Man’, and Lee ‘Easy Breezy’!!  Any of these folks are capable of bringing the Gold Bocce Ball Back to Tulsa!!


Time for Change With OKC Thunder?

Billy Donovan, frustration is starting to show in post-game conferences!  The struggling Russell Westbrook Thunder seems to be a rogue battleship with a skipper in the galley doing Jaeger shots!!  Looks like they will be playing the Blazers!!

Who is Going Where in College Basketball!?

Muscleman from Nevada to Arkansas?

Jamie Dixon (Ernie Munster) from TCU to UCLA?  Or not!  100 million dollar buyout?!

Sorry no go!

Coach Calamari at Kentucky signs a lifetime contract with Kentucky to recruit players for one year of college!!

Texas Tech Chris Beard to Arkansas?

Rick Pitino and his coaching baggage to Arkansas?

Cincinnati Coach to UCLA?  Did not see that coming?!  After 9 other offers were rejected then the 10th one is a charm!!

Eric Muscleman of Nevada is the winner of the Arkansas Basketball coaching job  

Coach Eddie Sutton Again Not Allowed Into the College Basketball Hall of Fame!

DON'T FORGET THE EDDIE SUTTON SHOOT FOR THE CENTER MAY 18TH 9 TO 5!!  WATCH MEDIA SPORTS FOLKS SHOOT AIRBALLS FOR FREE!

This is the most disgusting, egregious lack of respect for a coaching legend in the history of sports!!  Joe Paterno making the College Football Hall of Fame in 2006 and Coach Sutton, not in this Hall of Fame makes me want to hurl some chunks of groceries into the decision makers laps!!  I was very close to my great aunt Jewel who taught Algebra and Trigonometry at Central High School in downtown Tulsa for 25 years.  She was the also the chaperone for bus road trips for numerous Central Basketball games!  The coach on the bus that she loved and said was so handsome was Eddie Sutton!!  So at an early age I was a huge Mr. Sutton fan after learning how good he was to his players and my great aunt Jewell!!  

FOS MLB

Cardinals (10-9)

Cardinals bullpen is starting to look really sharp!!   Brebbia and Gant have a .53 ERA in the bullpen with three wins and a save between them!!   Pitching coach Maddox I starting to smile every time he looks out at the bullpen!!  

Cubs (7-9)

The Cubbies are starting to play up to there potential of being average!!

Astros (11-7)

With confidence booming the Astros are beginning to get their starting pitching lined up for the first round of the playoffs!!  Seriously......just kidding!

Words of wisdom from the unwise one:

Never, ever let your wife hide your meds, especially the Viagra!!  Haha!

Have a great sports week!!

B in T

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B, in T

Bill Self Heading to OKC Thunder? Close to His Hometown and Away from Mean Ole FBI!

FOS/B in T

FOS Notes!

Billy Self to Coach the OKC Thunder in 2019-2020?!?!

It would be a bold move by the Thunder but having Coach Self back close to Stillwater or Edmond where he grew up might be the missing ingredient to bring him back to Oklahoma!!  You heard it here first!!

What will Rod Thompson do for TU as an assistant coach?  Do you have a couple of hours?

1. 2019-2020 TU free throw percentage will increase from 70.5 to 78.5!  Field goal percentage up 5% and 3 point percentage up 3.5%!

2. The University of Tulsa Basketball Recruiting in Oklahoma will increase drastically through Coach Thompson relationships with his PWP AAU nationally known basketball teams!!

3. His son Bryce, happens to be a 4-star recruit from Tulsa Booker T Washington!!  I have always said that Bryce would look mighty fine in TU blue and gold!.

FOS NFL TRANSACTIONS 2019

LB Clay Matthews Now a Ram!

QB Blake Bortles Now a Ram!

Cowboy’s Whitten Unretired!

DB Honey Badger signed by Chiefs!

WR Tyreek Hill may not play football for the  Chiefs or any NFL team for a while!

WR Odell Beckham Jr is now a Brown!

QB Kyler Murray is soon to be a Cardinal!

WR DeSean Jackson now Tampa Bay Buccaneers!

QB Ryan Tannehill now a Tennessee Titan!

WR Golden Tate now a New York Giant!

RB Mark Ingram now a Baltimore Racen!

RB Le’Veon Bell now a New York Jet!

LB Terrell Suggs now an Arizona Cardinal!!

FOS College Football 🏈 

Tulsa Spring Training game notes:

Overcast skies at Chapman Stadium did not overshadow the bright and savage play of the Tulsa defense and the QB play of Zach Smith (A-)  completed 2 long touchdown passes of sixty yards to Junior Keylon Stokes (A-) No passes of that length were completed by TUs offense or against TUs defense last year!!  TU Linebacker Zaven Collins (A-) looked like he could play right now for the Chicago Bears!!  He stands 6’5” and weighs 255 and B in T is protecting him to be AP 2nd team All American 2019!!  The defense was very sharp!  QB Seth Boomer ( B) showed more leadership and maturity and had 1 bad pass for an interception.  Overall nice performance for Seth!  O- Line (B-) looked good at times and looked youthful confused at times!!  The running game (C+)was limited but effective with an average of 4 yards per carry not including sack yards!  

B in T is protecting the TU defense to be in the top forty the next 2 years!!

American Athletic Conference Makes Forbes Billionaires List!!

American Athletic Conference signs a 1 billion dollars, twelve-year agreement with ESPN!!  This will give each team including the University of Tulsa 6.8 million per year beginning in 2020!!  The current contract pays 2 million, this a huge increase for all the AAC participants!!  Indoor sports facility as nice as Union High School’s may be in the future for TU!!!

Is Barry Trammel getting under Russy Poos skin?!?!  

Class act Barry Trammel, who will be in the Oklahoma Sportswriter hall of fame (hopefully reads B in T some) seems to agitate the Thunders Westbrook when he simply asks how he is doing!!  Our athletes seem to like to treat the Media bad when they have bad games!!  Go to your 5 million dollar home, order take out food and shut the front door!!!  Go get' em Barry!

MLS

Cardinals   6-5

In two back to back games in early April, the Cardinals struck out thirty-two times against the Brewers and Pirates!!  That is 3 times more than I struck out at my Senior Prom!!!  The Birds need to resurrect the contact side of their hitting eye!!  They can hit dingers for distance with anyone in the National League but make some contact Birdies!!

Cubs  3-9

Cubs are off to a 1 and 9 start and little cubbies fans are not worried!!  The ghost of Harry Carrey has been seen numerous times by hammered fans around Wrigley Field!!  Famed super ghost detectives The Ghost Hunters have been hired by Cub executives in search to see if the late Cubs broadcaster can turn around the Cubs woes!!

Astros 6-5

The Stros pitching seems to be lost without Bishop Kelley’s Dallas Keuchel!!  Once Altuve starts hitting above his weight or height then the Astros will rock!!

Royals 2-7

The Royals are continuing to look for a catcher!  Numerous Royals scouts were seen in the Oklahoma high schools looking for prospects!  

Words of wisdom from the unwise one:

If you are at a party and find yourself very thirsty, DO NOT DRINK BONG WATER!  just saying....

Have a great sports week!

B in T FOS

FAKEDOUTSPORTS.BLOGSPOT.COM

B, in T