Faked Out Sports/B in T
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Notes ’Bout Nuttin’!
NASCAR Fans Can Be Found with Brazilian Ancestry!!
A few weeks ago on a Sunday, I decided to watch the Monster Talladega 500 (B in T not a huge fan) and my grandson Gus decided this looked pretty cool!! We would cheer for the green car, number 22 driven by Joey Logano!! Number 22 car would be in first and then dropped to 8th!! Back and forth Gus’ favorite car would go until a caution flag or a pit stop!! He stayed focused on the race for almost one hour which is 45 minutes longer than Papa’s NASCAR attention span!! Fortunately or unfortunately I recorded the race for Gus, at his request!! So every morning between 5:30 and 6:00 AM before school we get up and look for our number 22 car!! Next, I will check his pulse for the Indy 500!!
Beaver, Oklahoma Can Really Throw Some Chips!!
A small town in Oklahoma is known as the Cow Chip Throwing Capital of the World!! In 1969 this event started and in 1994 the event was seen on ABC’s Wide World of Sports!! This year is the 50th anniversary and Faked Out Sports sent correspondents at the end of April to the small town of Beaver!! The competition was fierce and the contestants were trying to beat the 2015 record throw of 185 feet!! Smiley Jones from New Lima had a throw of 183 feet 7 inches had the lead for most of the day!! A newcomer from Tishomingo, OK, by the name of Shorty Beefeater blew away everyone by a throw of 194 feet 5 inches!!. The Judges decided to investigate the Cow Chips used by the Tishomingo folks due to the odd shape and smell of the Cow Chip!! A Toxicology expert from Mayes County reviewed the cow poop and discovered that this was indeed buffalo poop mixed with fudge and nuts!! Mr. Beefeater was disqualified and asked to never bring his crap to Beaver again!! Stay tuned to more Faked Out Sports Noodling in Kingfisher reports!!
Faked Outs Sports Ranking Big 12’s Way to Early 100 Days till Football Ranking:
- Oklahoma - lots of hoopla about new Defensive Guru Grinch but we will see! First test against the Houston Cougar offense and Coach Dana will be interesting!! Early over/under on total offensive yards for Houston is 575 total yards!! Go with the under!!
- Texas - Coach Tom Herman could do absolutely nothing and still have football recruits pop up in Austin like dandelions in my back yard!!
- Iowa State - Coach Matt Campbell did not flee Cyclone Nation and will be there in 2019!! He has rejected numerous XFL head coaching possibilities!!
- Oklahoma State - Coach Mullet is very secretive with the local media!! Thus I had my 2-year old granddaughter pick a number between 1 and 10, and she picked fo!! This the Pokes will be 4th in 2019!!
- Texas Christian University - With the Tasmanian Devil as
your football coach, Gary Patterson should spin to another nice record in the Big 12!! - West Virginia - Neal Brown from Troy is the new head coach and expect some offense from this Mike Leach disciple!!
- Kansas State -Chris Klieman from North Dakota State is the new head coach at Kansas State.. The new balmy climate of Manhattan will make recruiting better for Coach Klieman and his new hire assistants!!
- Baylor - Coach Ruhle was seen on the final episode of HGTV’S Fixer Upper but the show was canceled when Coach Ruhle allowed the Linemen to do the home destruction scene instead of Skip!! This is a violation NCAA rule 2378CG!!
- Texas Tech - Matt Wells from Utah State will lead the Red Raiders! He was also an ex TU Co-Offensive Coordinator!!
- Kansas - Les Miles goes from Mayor of Dr. Pepper Commercial’s, Fansville to Head Coach of the Kansas Jayhawks football team!! He will not like playing second fiddle to Billy Self!!
- Sapulpa Blue 3rd Grade- returning twenty-two underclassmen!!!
- Cushing High School Tigers- returning two of Jami in Tulsa and B in T’s nephews who have recently received FFA student awards!!!
Finally, the Big 12 has 12 members!!
FOS MLB
Cardinals: the redbirds are flying under radar!!
Cubs: the cubbies are above the redbird radar!!
Brewers: The Brewers AND Brewries are veeery hot and beer sales are way up!! I expect park pics Mr Zinck!!
Astro: Altuve lovers will be saddened by his strained hip flexor and groin aggravation for 2 months!!
Words of Wisdom from the unwise one: Never drive a golf cart at Southern Hills Country Club stoned!!
Have a great sports week!
FOS/B in T
Sponsors:
Andre Tourihno, Golf and Fitness Expert, Southern Hills
Colin Magruder, Mtg Broker, Evolve Bank
Speedling Inc., Leon Zinc III
Uncle Thurston, Dallas, Tx
Steve’s Happy Dog Home, Sherri Watson
Christina Morrill, United Country Landrum Realty, Inc.
Chris Taylor, sports writer FanSided
Bob’s Bail Bonds and Car Wash (Chicago, IL)
Big Brother Bill’s Psychic Palm Reading and Bed & Breakfast (Tulsa, OK)
MR Bait, Fishing Tackle and Homemade Fudge Shop (Boulder, CO)
Weh’s Wiener Wagon and Dry Cleaners, Lawrence, Kansas
T-Brew’s Cockroach Farm and Pizza Palace, Tulsa, OK
Dr. Richard Stephens, DDS
Roy Thomason Retired Sigma Chi TU
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