Faked Out Sports/B in T!!
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FOS Notes ’bout nuthin:
Has UCLA Football Hit Rock Bottom With Chip Kelly??
Harry Trotter (2-10) was the coach for UCLA in the 1920s and is the only UCLA football coach to have a worse record than current coach Chip Kelly (3-9)!!! Coach Trotter was also a stunt double in Hollywood Westerns such as Bat Masterson and The Rifleman!! He was known to leave sideline passes for Tom Mix and Charlton Heston!! Roy Rogers and Dale Evans were were huge donors to the UCLA program (donated numerous horses and lassos to the program back in the day) and frequently were seen in Coach Trotters office discussing recruiting!!! Coach Chip has a one week reprieve after the team in baby blue defeated Washington State 68-65 with a 3-pointer at the buzzer!!
B in T Top Oklahoma High School Underclassmen for 2021 Plus!
Jalin Orange, Shawnee DB - 2022
6 interceptions as a Freshman
Gentry Williams, BTW QB, DB - 2022
Offers from Oklahoma and Michigan
Ethan Downs, Weatherford DE - 2021
Offers from Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Tulsa
Kendall Daniels, Beggs, Safety - 2021
Javion Hunt, Carl Albert, Running Back - 2021
AJ Green, Union, Defensive Back, - 2021
Collin Oliver, Edmond Sate Fe Outside Linebacker - 2021
Mason Williams, Bixby, Quarterback- 2021 TU lost Mason Fine, not this Mason though!
Owasso’s entire freshman squad should be on the watch list! Everyone wants coach Blankenship!
Any Bobbleheads playing youth football down to kindergarten with the last name of: Calmus, McWharters, Lehman, Sims, or Largent - Automatically put on FOS watch list!!
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Sightings of Pumpkin Man Have Already Started As Halloween Approaches at Target and Yuppy Houses All Over Tulsa!
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B in T and Faked Out Sports is reporting that Pumpkin Man may or may not have appeared at the following places:
- The patio at Queenies, Utica Square!
- Lockerroom at a Blackwell Football game, weird!
- The Hexx House Terror Night!!
- Eating edibles at the Gathering Place!
- Doing a routine with Cascia Hall cheerleaders!!
- Drinking wine spritzers with numerous unknown youth at Woodward Park!!
- On top of the Admiral Twin Drive-in Movie Theatre!
- The ’Outsiders’ home in the restroom!
- He might be moonwalking in front of the BOK Center!
- Noodling in Kingfisher with KOTV’s Tess Maune!!
- Under Donny Boy’s hair!
FOS Bobblehead Sports:
Bicycle Kick By a Five Year Old?
B in T was at his grandsons game and watch him do what Gus called a bicycle kick!! He did the so-called Brazilian Bicycle kick by sliding on the ground and kicking the ball! This is followed by his dad who is from Brazil offering to get him a bicycle for Christmas if he sticks with soccer all year!! The Brazillian Bicycle Kick bribe!!
2nd Grade Jenks Maroon 30 Sapulpa 12
The Jenks Maroon team had a great time at Chucky Cheese after the Sapulpa victory!! The parents were upset when they found out there was no bar in Chuck E Cheese!!
3rd Grade Pryor 25 Catoosa 0
Pryor had numerous players get great play stickers on their helmets for the game!! Even the team play counter, the snack list mom, the team Doctor, the team photographer, and the team nutritionist all received football stickers for their cheeks!!
4th Grade Union Silver 23 Bixby White 16
Union Silver upset Bixby White in a Bobblehead slobber knocker of a game at Tuttle Stadium!! The Bixby White dads got in a small skirmish with some Union dads, but it did not rate enough to get on 48 Hours or even preppy John Holcomb of Channel 6, Tulsa!! Parents, if your gonna fight at a kids game bring your A-game or just be quiet!!
FOS College Picks:
Oklahoma 56 Texas Tech 31
Oklahoma's defense continues to quietly improve under Coach the Grinch who stole Mike Stoops job!! Texas Tech coach Mark Wells earned some offensive coaching skills at TU doing crazy plays such as triple reverses, hook and the lateral, hidden man on the sideline in a body cast play, and Air Raid plays which are all in his family coaching tree!! QB Jalen Hurts runs and passes for 4 touchdowns!! OU wideouts Cee Dee Lamb and Lee Morris catch 5 passes for 205 yards!! Tremendous YAC efforts by both!! YAC is not a long-haired Bison from Norway, it simply stands for Yards After Catch!! The Red Raider mascot, who looks a little bit like Zoro on crack, hitches an unwelcome ride on the Sooner Schooner and is unmasked by the the Sooner RUF/NECKS!! Numerous folks swear that Donald Trump was under the mask!!
Texas A&M 41 at Arkansas 24
The Aggies QB Kellen Mond made the Hog defense look average!! His talented offensive line kept him unscathed and barely touched all-day!! Mond did have some serious red-stained jersey pants when an overexuberant team manager spilled some cherry Gatorade on his crotch!!
Oklahoma State 38 Kansas State 24
The Oklahoma State Cowboys, not to be confused with The Ohio State Buckeyes, showed the Cats known sometimes to be Wild, a thing or two about football!! Wildcat Coach Kliemer was quiet at his postgame media interviews and stated he was served some bad chili cheese fries at Eskimo Joes Friday night and his tum-tum hurts!!
******FOS UPSET SPECIAL**********
Nebraska 36 Ohio State 27
B in T learned from History Channel executives that crop circles were formed the night before game day showing the words ’BUCKEYES SUCK CORN SHUCKS’!! Numerous nerds from Area 51 (B in T included ) took over some of the Ohio State tailgating areas and claimed that Coach Ryan Day was indeed an ALIEN!! Nebraska Quarterback Martinez was definitely an alien to the Buckeye tacklers, running for 115 yards and passing for 232 yards and 3 touchdowns!!
Iowa State 38 at Baylor 35
The ’Clones pick up a huge road win in Waco, the city that Chip and JoAnne rebuilt!! The Chip and Joanna Gaines ’keys to the city of Baylor’ ceremony erased the Iowa State Cyclone Pep Band 100 routine before the game!! The Cyclone football team was incensed by the lack of respect shown their Pep Band and took it out on the Bears!!
Clemson 48 at North Carolina 23
Welcome to Dabo land, coach Mac Brown! Mac Brown’s defense could not slow down Clemson’s hair model QB Trevor Lawrence!! Trevor has announced he is no longer dating his high school sweetheart and will concentrate on his football career while working on his celibacy for monkhood!! Coach Mac was visibly upset with the poor play of his Tar Heels and cried on coach Dabo’s shoulder as they walked off the field!!
Washington 41 USC 18
Washington’s 6’6” 230-pound tall timber QB, Jacob Eason made the Trojan’s defense look simple and soft!! Southern Cal coach Helton actually sent out resumes on Linkedin at halftime!! This was reported TMZ as well!!
Washington State 38 at Utah 30
Cougar coach Leach was on the Ferrell on the Bench radio show Thursday night and predicted a super game at Ogden against the Utes Saturday night!! Furthermore, he predicted a huge discovery at Area 51!! Coach Leach stated that an alien creature was discovered to run as a Democratic presidential opponent for Donnie Boy to beat up!! WSU QB Anthony Gordon completed sharp accurate passes when he needed to and preserved the victory!!
Auburn 35 Mississippi State 24
The Bulldogs just received 3 years probation for academic misconduct or basically, a smart person took a test or plagiarized a paper for a dumb person!! The freshman QB for State had trouble finding the right colored jersey!!
FOS High School Picks:
Bixby 46 Sapulpa 22
Bixby QB Mason Williams threw for 305 yards and 4 touchdown!! This kid is dope!! He can play a mean QB and his size should not scare D1 recruiters!! Just ask North Texas QB 5’11” Mason Fine from Locust Grove, Oklahoma who is on the Heisman Trophy watch list!!
Bishop Kelley 51 Hale 12
Oklahoma State commits, Bishop Kelley’s Zac Middleton made the offense click like a well-oiled machine and had 1 interception on defense!! BK Wide receiver Cori Lewis has some wheels and made my alma mater look like they were smudging through quicksand!!
BTW 38 at Bartlesville 24
Sophomore BTW quarterback Gentry Williams threw for 2 touchdowns, ran for 2 touchdowns, intercepted 1 pass, high fived Clemson’s Dabo Sweeney and Alabama’s Nick Saban on the way to the restroom!! True Story!! Dilly Dilly!!
Broken Arrow 34 at Jenks 25
Members of the Jenks Quarterback Club were told to bring their Club T-Shirts, Trojan Magnum sized cowbells (similar to the cowbells used on the SNL Will Ferrell skit) and finally make sure that they arrive at 5:45 so they can park their Tahoe SUVs all together!!
Owasso 33 Union 20
Owasso is ranked #1 in 6A1!! Jenks, Union, and Broken Arrow have been ranked #1 since dinosaurs roamed the high school football fields of Tulsa!! The coaching staff of Owasso is starting to get numerous calls from college coaches regarding employment!! The Ram Booster Rooster Club will start fundraising for bumping up the salaries of the Owasso assistant coaches!!!
Holland Hall 27 at Pacola 16
The Pocola Indians crowd was jam-packed and some of the Pocola faithful had to sit by the Hall fans and their polo shirts and skinny jeans! B in T lovingly calls this the battle of the skinny jeans versus the Wrangler jeans!! After the game, a group of parents from both teams got together to go for a Squatch hunt!! The parents found out they both had a hankering to find Bigfoot!!! Only in a high school football game in Oklahoma!
FOS Mom O Meter Pacola .956 Holland Hall .945 The Pocola moms and the Holland Hall moms were neck and neck with powder puff football, noodling, and psychedelic quilt making but the main difference was the experience of the Pocola moms with the Bigfoot mating calls!! The mating calls are made by hitting pine wood boards against trees!! The Dutch ladies simply made lip-smacking noises and were graded accordingly!!
FOS Diner of the Week
Jims Razorback Pizza 7.1 miles, Fort Smith, Arkansas Great pizza and vegan food options!! The owner who is named Jim, states that numerous celebrities have had veggie pizza at his establishment!! The actress who played Minnie Pearl by the name of Minnie Pearl once had veggie pizza there!! Jim once gave free coffee and garlic bread to a tour bus headed to Dolly World!! Google it!!
Kingfisher 42 at Blackwell 12
Blackwell played a tough game but deer season is close and the young Maroons could not get in the football mood!! The Kingfishers Noodlers had no problem putting deer season on the back burner and kicking Blackwell’s arse!!
Cushing 38 Madill 12
The Madill Wildcats have a special place in B in Ts heart ❤️because my Great Aunt Jewell Ramsey was very special to me and was a Trigonometry teacher a Madill High School!! Cushing Tiger BMOC QB Will Moyer passed to Keaton Crookes for 3 touchdowns in the first half!! QB Moyer was very appreciative of his O Line for not partying too much and took them all out for Sonic shakes!! My super nephews from Cushing had great games and were mobbed by all the girls at Cushing just to touch their mullet hair cuts!! Their dad Mike and uncle B in T also have mullets!!
Cascia Hall 33 at Verdigris 28
Verdigris Cardinals are a tough team to beat at their house and the Commandos found a way!! The Commando offense teased the Cardinal defense just enough to score one more touchdown!! The Cardinal and the Cascia Bulldog Mascot got into a slap fight during the second quarter with both young men being sent to Verdigris Police cars for warnings!! That really happened!!
FOS NFL Picks:
Chiefs 27 at Lions 20
The Chiefy Wiefys bested the very average Lions and their overrated QB!! Two touchdowns for over 50 yards to Tyreek Hill really helped B in T’s fantasy football team!!
Ravens 31 Browns 20
The Ravens bring the Browns boy wonder Baker back to earth with 5 sacks!!! Although Baker was in a body cast with ice covering his whole body he addressed the postgame press conference and insisted he will be at practice Monday!!
Seahawks 24 at Cardinals 13
Seahawks QB Wilson is married to someone famous, I think it is Holly Berry!! If my hunch is accurate and they normally are, Kyler Murray should be married to a Kardashian by the end of the year!!
Cowboys 24 at New Orleans 21
Jerry Jones is locking up all his stud players by simply selling off all his G 6 Lear Jets or parts of his island and the product he sells in Jamaica!! True story, Google that shat!! Cowboys win with field goal as time expires!! Dilly Dilly!
Words of wisdom from the unwise one!! Never, ever, ever tell your toddler grandkids that there really is a Great Pumpkin!! Pumpkin patches are hard to find in Oklahoma!
Have a great sports week!!
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| B, in T |
